[User] Oh, no, they can't. because as I did not predict it's raining on.

[Assistant] You know, my fear is swelling you up. Oh, why is your grandmother's depression ring so tight? Give me that butter.


[User] Let me help you with that. I got.

[Assistant] Oh my God, I'm so sorry, oh.


[User] No, he's a child and he's reaching out.

[Assistant] To you is yay, reach it out to me. I didn't hear my damn phone ringing. You know what? As far as I'm concerned, he's canceled. If he don't give a flip about this family and don't want to be a part of it, that's fine with me. What I do give a flip about is you not being honest with me?


[User] I know, can you even.

[Assistant] barman and I have been here foreverand have yet to see our dandelion chickpea fagua.he's hypoglycemic. and I'm Lila


[User] You're just using this as a way to distance yourself from me and your baby because you're scared and you don't know what to do.

[Assistant] How could I be distancing myself? I'm here every fucking night.


[User] With fresh milk soak.

[Assistant] No honey oil, oil. Okay, yeah, breast milk. Okay, no, it's not okay, Adam, it was fortifying. Okay, it is a big deal to me. Okay, I'm feeling insecure enough as it is. And to be mixed in with all these people and sleep and felt it.  I'm sorry, I just.


[User] Oh my God. Or counting?

[Assistant] You say nachos. All say chokes. One, two, three, nachos. See, I win. I win because I'm in charge.


[User] You say nachos. All say chokes. One, two, three, nachos. See, I win. I win because I'm in charge.

[Assistant] Fine, all right, What about beef notches? You want me to just say beef?


[User] Okay, put this in a safe place. It's for Rubin is one of those. How do you say again that the?

[Assistant] Is that the helicopter with a camera in it that you control with your phone? And when I ask for.


[User] Is that the helicopter with a camera in it that you control with your phone? And when I ask for.

[Assistant] Ok, when your house burned down, you get one of these. Now don't bring your house down.


[User] Ok, when your house burned down, you get one of these. Now don't bring your house down.

[Assistant] How lucky is Ruben? So lucky? You know what I say? We take this thing out and see how she flies. I don't know. My mom got it for Reuben. Oh, so now he won't even share his toys. He never does screw that guy. Your terrible influence. You need me.


[User] Let's go home, muddy.

[Assistant] Look, I don't know what you have against me. Hey, I'll even know you. So I was wondering, maybe, you know, maybe we can be cold and you even have to like, yeah, I know what you mean. Tell you what what?


[User] Not until today, even aligned to.

[Assistant] I don't understand who's they, Who would want to prevent you from getting this job? I can't get into. Oh, come on, Robert. I am your wife. Remember, remember, we promise we weren't going to keep any secrets from each other. Well, here I am in the middle of a campaign, and I want to know, is something going to come out All of a sudden something is gonna surprise. Is there going to be an investigation?


[User] I'm not taking anything until the cops get here.

[Assistant] Oh, I don't think that's necessary. I mean, the damage is minimal.


[User] Oh, I don't think that's necessary. I mean, the damage is minimal.

[Assistant] Minimal, oh, so now you're a mechanic as well as an irresponsible parent. Got it. One sec gurney, just call on the cops.


[User] Minimal, oh, so now you're a mechanic as well as an irresponsible parent. Got it. One sec gurney, just call on the cops.

[Assistant] First of all, I could very well be a mechanic, but I am a lawyer and I couldn't help but notice that you are in violation of Rule fifty seven of the highway codes.


[User] Well, then. Let's handle this on our own. Without insurance, No law enforcement need to get involved.

[Assistant] Keep your kid off the road. And I'll get my insurance. Gertie promise will be home soon and you'll get your one egg white. Okay, fine. You can have two.


[User] Probably, Joe. So what are we thinking? No play dates for a week.

[Assistant] I know it was you. You wanted them, God, and you frowned them out.


[User] I know it was you. You wanted them, God, and you frowned them out.

[Assistant] I'm admitting nothing. But you said one cousin would be here for one day and there were three here for a week.


[User] Why is Jerry still here?

[Assistant] I know something must be wrong. He's sitting in the car like a sad little man. We have to go and invite him in.


[User] I know something must be wrong. He's sitting in the car like a sad little man. We have to go and invite him in.

[Assistant] Oh no, he'll move off eventually. Great Street sweeping is Thursday.


[User] Jerry, just come inside.

[Assistant] No, I couldn't. That got to love a man with pride. That's the thing that will serve you well on the freeway.


[User] There is so much to keep track of.

[Assistant] Our entire lives are on these cards. Red is diet yellow as therapies green as meds, blue as aids and wrists and.


[User] Oh my God. Think, think is our sex life. If we didn't have a card for it, it would go straighten the cracker with everything that's going on.

[Assistant] Isn't it Tuesday?


[User] Forget the ice. Who are you sending this to?

[Assistant] We know family and friends. Oh, yeah. Put this broccoli on your head.


[User] Debris cooking is coming along someday. I might even consider her for a job at Shea Marie and. How about you considering me for a job in your?

[Assistant] It's not a real restaurant. It snake flees.


[User] It's not a real restaurant. It snake flees.

[Assistant] What about this? What about this? Deborah is outnumbered by the kids, three to one. So I've had to help out. So now it's. So you're saying that you are worth two of me?


[User] What about this? What about this? Deborah is outnumbered by the kids, three to one. So I've had to help out. So now it's. So you're saying that you are worth two of me?

[Assistant] No one's going to do the math. I'm just saying it's nice.


[User] No one's going to do the math. I'm just saying it's nice.

[Assistant] It's not nice. It's you having to help. Poor, pathetic, Deborah.


[User] Not like this. No way.

[Assistant] Well, I'm sorry, but this is my letter. And this is America.


[User] Come on. Hey, listen, man, She didn't want to disappoint you. Oh, you understand? And hey, hey, listen, I know I overdid it with a dinner. My fault. Okay, but I was trying to take your mind off of the other. Dad is a.

[Assistant] Not your job, Kevin. That's the point. It's not your job. Okay, she's going to be my wife. I am supposed to be her person. not you. All right. I'm the one who's supposed to cheer her up. I'm the one who's supposed to buy her birthday dinner.


[User] Not your job, Kevin. That's the point. It's not your job. Okay, she's going to be my wife. I am supposed to be her person. not you. All right. I'm the one who's supposed to cheer her up. I'm the one who's supposed to buy her birthday dinner.

[Assistant] Buy the dinner. I spent the dinner with me. Can't afford this crap.


[User] Buy the dinner. I spent the dinner with me. Can't afford this crap.

[Assistant] Karen, I hate that you pay for meals while we're out every time. What is that? You're not her father give, and you're not her.


[User] Karen, I hate that you pay for meals while we're out every time. What is that? You're not her father give, and you're not her.

[Assistant] Okay, stop right there. Do not tell me how to take care of my sister. I've been taking care of her for a really long time.


[User] Theo Mason.

[Assistant] Theo Preschool. Theo bubble bulbs when you were 3. Theo,


[User] I'm sorry. Are you waiting for me to say something? Because I have this weird recollection of being fired from all high foods?

[Assistant] I didn't fire you. Tommy fired you.


[User] Which is exactly why I will not speak with him.

[Assistant] Oh, come on. I defended you. Now I need you to help me come up with a response to it.


[User] Thanks, Miss Katinski.

[Assistant] Hardworking, smart, responsible. And is it weird that I a grown woman? I'm consistently jealous of your wardrobe.


[User] I don't wanna have this conversation.

[Assistant] yeah,because you know you're wrong.you you knowI tore that photograph and put the pieces on your face.that was the idea.that was the fuckingidea. I can't believe you would try and take credit for that.


[User] yeah,because you know you're wrong.you you knowI tore that photograph and put the pieces on your face.that was the idea.that was the fuckingidea. I can't believe you would try and take credit for that.

[Assistant] you tore up a picture.big fucking deal.I'm the one who told you to photograph it.I'm the one who saw the potential.


[User] Like you sent, uh.

[Assistant] So anyway, I, I was wondering if. I really need to talk to you and, um. I, I don't, I don't want to do it on the phone. Can we meet? do you think?


[User] that's me, Caroline.

[Assistant] why do you think I bought the gun?


[User] have a reason form right back here.

[Assistant] don't bring that over here. let's bin to your crack.


[User] don't think you don't have a problem.

[Assistant] Geez, where is it? is there a map or a tour guide?


[User] I didn't do anything to you.

[Assistant] I didn't back that goddamn list and I didn't turn you in.then why was I just suspended? Mike?


[User] it is all connected.why did I get the tape today?huh? I went to the moonmark because of my dream,because Ramon LED to me there.

[Assistant] page,this fixation with your patient, it's clouding everything.


[User] page,this fixation with your patient, it's clouding everything.

[Assistant] well, you're always nagging me about embracing this ritualand I'm fucking doing itthis time is not the only way.


[User] Ah, just thought that you might be too upset to enjoy the day.

[Assistant] But it's so perfect this way. It's so perfect. The only way that I get to get married in a long white gown is to have my dead baby leaking out of me all day. That's me. That's what I get for my wedding.


[User] I have three tests on Monday. If I don't get at least to be in all of them, I can pretty much kiss being a doctor goodbye. and if I'm lucky, I'll get to clean the doctor's pools. And you know what? I know? I know. how important is this wedding and engagement extravaganza is to you. But if you want me to be that little plastic guy on top of the cake, this isn't going to work for me.

[Assistant] What, wait, wait, wait, wait. So now this wedding is my idea. Are you serious? That is so unfair, Justin, If you don't think this is going to work, don't blaze me. I inform you.


[User] What, wait, wait, wait, wait. So now this wedding is my idea. Are you serious? That is so unfair, Justin, If you don't think this is going to work, don't blaze me. I inform you.

[Assistant] This is insane. I don't know what I.


[User] How much did I take and Nicholas Worth? Here. Here's a quarter. Keep your change.

[Assistant] Don't throw money at me.


[User] Don't throw money at me.

[Assistant] Oh yeah. What are you going to do?


[User] Let's go, dad.

[Assistant] Sorry, I'm real sorry. Hey, don't apologize for me. He's the one blowing a gasket over a handful of bird seed.


[User] Sorry, I'm real sorry. Hey, don't apologize for me. He's the one blowing a gasket over a handful of bird seed.

[Assistant] It's called stealing Cuba.


[User] It's called stealing Cuba.

[Assistant] Hey, pockey. Don't turn your back on me. I'm standing right here, but.


[User] did your old life of one of these

[Assistant] cataline. what is my No. 1 dino rule?


[User] cataline. what is my No. 1 dino rule?

[Assistant] don't tell anyone the meat isn't real.


[User] don't tell anyone the meat isn't real.

[Assistant] come on, if you can see it, it's real.


[User] don't tell anyoneyou buy the shrimp out of your friend's trunk.

[Assistant] he lays down a blanket. no,no phones.


[User] he lays down a blanket. no,no phones.

[Assistant] Max, he got us the reservation.I'm going to dinner at the new it place.


[User] Max, he got us the reservation.I'm going to dinner at the new it place.

[Assistant] ooh, the its place. let's have dinner at the its place.how come this isn't the its place?


[User] ooh, the its place. let's have dinner at the its place.how come this isn't the its place?

[Assistant] this isn't an it place. it's more of an it hole.


[User] But we haven't even left the parking spot.

[Assistant] Exactly, I mean, does a surgeon take up organs on the first day of med school well?


[User] He can't take out any organs if he can't drive to med school.

[Assistant] Well, then she can take the bus, or if she had a chill mom, really? Oh, the mother was chill. Suddenly, I'm not chill. I am chill.


[User] bays. put it down.

[Assistant] seriously. okay. okay. listen to this.I'm at a Bridal X but all day.but how does next Saturday sound for car shopping?he's buying her a new car. are you kidding me?she won't even let me give her driving lessons.I try to get her a car, he knocks me off of it.she didn't talk to me about boys.I mean, no wonder I can't get any traction.I'm being secretly undermined by Captain Jerk Sauce.


[User] whatever you're doing,don't,

[Assistant] what,what?what's single guy doesn't love bridle exposed.I mean, I'm just gonna goand I'm going to do a little drive by,take in the new tuxedo trends,perus, the new China pattern or two.and I'm going to show Ryanthat just because he punched me off of the cardoes not mean that he won the fight.


[User] Just lying there. What are we going to do now?

[Assistant] What, what are we going to do? He's got a shiny new license. Martin expires before his does not.


[User] What, what are we going to do? He's got a shiny new license. Martin expires before his does not.

[Assistant] Ok, well, just because he slipped through the crack, this incredibly huge crack doesn't mean he should be allowed to drive. We still have to talk to him.


[User] I see you've really thought this through what happens to your Nerf car when it rains.

[Assistant] You ring it out at the light. Rayne, the real problem is the wind. This is, yeah, my car.


[User] It's getting older, right?

[Assistant] Yeah. But he passed the test. And I got to tell you. I was, I was a little proud of them, you know, because. Maybe that means that. He's not really that old.


[User] Yeah. But he passed the test. And I got to tell you. I was, I was a little proud of them, you know, because. Maybe that means that. He's not really that old.

[Assistant] I know it's hard, you know? Especially when they live right across the street and. You see him every day. Sometimes two, three times a day. And, you know, you don't notice that they're getting older.


[User] They're making me give them a list of everyone who was there.

[Assistant] I didn't take nothing but f.y. You know, you could put on that list, your boy, Brandon.


[User] Maybe you're right. Maybe I'm worrying too much.

[Assistant] You are.


[User] Oh my God. He's going to kill everyone in the house.

[Assistant] The truck was here and there were so many boxes. And you know how excited I get about it as deduction.


[User] The truck was here and there were so many boxes. And you know how excited I get about it as deduction.

[Assistant] Listen to me. He is not going to believe that this was an accident. You can never, ever tell him.


[User] Four little douche bags with skinny ties, Cocker Spaniel haircuts. We're not opening for a twelve year old named Chad Love.

[Assistant] Your name is Oliver Rome. You're gonna be playing to more people than you could have ever possibly played to on your own and you're upset.


[User] Your name is Oliver Rome. You're gonna be playing to more people than you could have ever possibly played to on your own and you're upset.

[Assistant] So these are all seated shows, right? Yeah, butts in seats. That means they only show up for the headliner. So here we are, a bunch of toolboxes. play into an empty giant room with maybe a couple fan club kids going. Who are these guys? Yeah, I don't think.


[User] More money than you have to made in your life.

[Assistant] Okay, I don't want to sacrifice any sort of artistic credibility that we even have right now, which is very small. Just we don't say a little way on a big ship made out of money, hey?


[User] Okay, I don't want to sacrifice any sort of artistic credibility that we even have right now, which is very small. Just we don't say a little way on a big ship made out of money, hey?

[Assistant] Arcade fire. They didn't call radio Radiohead. They're not calling. Here's your option. and it's a damn good one.


[User] Arcade fire. They didn't call radio Radiohead. They're not calling. Here's your option. and it's a damn good one.

[Assistant] This is your big money cow that you guys wanna take in and just praise. We're not gonna make the dough for you. We're not doing this stuff.


[User] Put an offer in.

[Assistant] You have the money, pull it from Ohio and transfer it into your personal account and make an offer. Mom, the agent.


[User] I'm texting another war mother.

[Assistant] Since when do you text?


[User] thanks for the support.this is exactly what I'm fucking talking about.

[Assistant] oh,come on,this is ridiculous.you're driving up there allbecause there's some random snapshot I can't see with that.


[User] What story?

[Assistant] Story about how we found a blonde hair extension out of nowhere that night. Or he is.


[User] Story about how we found a blonde hair extension out of nowhere that night. Or he is.

[Assistant] Well, it's already funnier than most of your stories. Oh, look, there's another hilarious story.


[User] Do batters and give you depths?

[Assistant] I have to go and try and reattach these. These weaves are supposed to last. Is unbelievable.


[User] Should I call it fummer?

[Assistant] Yes, tell him it's an emergency. And don't let anybody use the bathroom.


[User] Years, I have to call David.

[Assistant] The boy you toss you aside on Valentine's Day, no. You deserve better. Haley, a dreamer, a poet. Wait for him. He may be closer than you think.


[User] Smart move. Meeting your X, You want to make a statement?

[Assistant] Uh huh. Don't flat here, so.


[User] Then why did you shoot me that? Look at school.

[Assistant] It was meant for Joe. I worry that he doesn't have your strong conscience. I worry that he has my family genes where we can lie and lie and lie and lie without feeling one ounce of guilt.


[User] I'll catch you the cup.

[Assistant] So I had a brain wave. Okay, so, um, if what you guys, you know, having a gay wave with the baby red, and I reckon you guys need some cute on. So you come with us. Don't waste, boss.


[User] You know, I wouldn't have been the worst thing that we've done, okay?

[Assistant] How can you even say that? I mean, he lied to you. He made you think buying that land was your idea. I'm sorry, but. You couldn't pay me to go to his arraignment. Not at all. Oh. Oh, great. It's my mom again, who's shown on answering that?


[User] Was the first time you ever saw snow?

[Assistant] Oh. So let's try it on.


[User] Oh. So let's try it on.

[Assistant] He said, daddy, why is the sky so dusty? She muttered. We laughed so hard. and you got angry. You said why? What's so funny? What is so funny?


[User] He said, daddy, why is the sky so dusty? She muttered. We laughed so hard. and you got angry. You said why? What's so funny? What is so funny?

[Assistant] You are. No, you remember laughing at me? It was a little rude, I think.


[User] Volumizer makes my hair louder.

[Assistant] All this stuff. deep, poor cleanser. Clarifying lotion. Do you even know what this stuff is for?


[User] Ah, they saw you come in, honey.

[Assistant] I didn't know. There are experts in there. They all have lab coats on. What? I thought all this stuff was for women, but they got a whole line of crap for men.


[User] I didn't know. There are experts in there. They all have lab coats on. What? I thought all this stuff was for women, but they got a whole line of crap for men.

[Assistant] Right, you are completely out of your mind. I say one thing about your brother and and you turn it to George Hamilton.


[User] Yeah, Ok. But I look better now. Still not as good as Robert, right?

[Assistant] As good as robber.


[User] You said that he was the handsome one.

[Assistant] Guess Robert's handsome, But he's not who I'm attracted to.


[User] Well, then who is it?

[Assistant] It used to be you, Ray. I mean, come on. What do you think all that this stuff makes you sexy? This, this stuff is not you, right? You know? And that's not what I want. I want my regular way of. That's the way I've always wanted.


[User] Gotta get pizza.

[Assistant] Ah, well. so it's seven thirty tonight, okay?


[User] I can't find your bunk pan. You still have.

[Assistant] So it's right there, right in front of your face right next to the yellow mold.


[User] And the worst.

[Assistant] You're not the worst. I don't want to hear that talk anymore. All you got to do is keep trying. Hey, remember the story of the tortoise and the hare and the tortoise was way behind in the race, But he kept saying, I think I can. I think I can.


[User] A train said that.

[Assistant] Okay, it doesn't matter who said it. What matters is that is a true story about. And all you gotta do is keep thinking you can and keep playing and you will win that.


[User] Do I have to?

[Assistant] Yes, yet, No, no. No, no, you don't have to. I don't want anyone to think that I'm making you. But I don't want you to miss out on the fun. That's the most important part. The fun.


[User] we did great.we want our bed on there. she blows.yes.how much do we get?

[Assistant] are we talking at Avocado Money?


[User] are we talking at Avocado Money?

[Assistant] well, we did do great and then we did not greatand then we did bad and then we did real bad.I've never been terrible.long story short, I'm out of Tums and we owe Nicky $3,000. oh,


[User] well, we did do great and then we did not greatand then we did bad and then we did real bad.I've never been terrible.long story short, I'm out of Tums and we owe Nicky $3,000. oh,

[Assistant] you? you owe Nicky what? I got addicted to pizza Pringles.I didn't make it your problem.


[User] you? you owe Nicky what? I got addicted to pizza Pringles.I didn't make it your problem.

[Assistant] your breath made it all our problems.Max, Nicky's not like dangerous, is he?


[User] your breath made it all our problems.Max, Nicky's not like dangerous, is he?

[Assistant] I bet he's not. but even if he is, don't worry,you can survive in the trunk of a Lincoln for 5, 6 days easy,


[User] But he deserves a goodbye.

[Assistant] What about what I deserve? What about what your granddaughter deserves? after I did exactly what you told me to do, which was to be patient and kind and loving and open and try to stand by him through everything. And I did that. And I know you have a weird military thing with him. but what about me?


[User] A mere hin. Sweetheart, do you love him?

[Assistant] I don't know why you would ask me a question like that. I don't know what you're trying to say, but I don't want to talk about this with you. It's, it's, it's not your business. It's just not.


[User] NSBA, op.

[Assistant] grandma got me into it.


[User] You know, sometimes when people say, I love you, the other person says.

[Assistant] Aye, thank you. And I bid you a fond farewell.


[User] Aye, thank you. And I bid you a fond farewell.

[Assistant] You didn't have to bite my head off.


[User] What are you doing? Close the refrigerator. Put that on a plate. I don't want to plate.

[Assistant] I want a couple of bite.


[User] Yeah, he's out. Need problems. Think the range has got a pretty good shot.

[Assistant] Yeah, no kidding. But thanks. Thanks, I feel like a baby's buck.


[User] We are.

[Assistant] Yes, we did. Okay, let's see the, the birth mom is from Missouri.


[User] That's not true. All right, it isn't.

[Assistant] Oh no. Who made Jeffrey cry at Christmas? Because Daddy had to try the toy airplane before anybody else.


[User] Oh no. Who made Jeffrey cry at Christmas? Because Daddy had to try the toy airplane before anybody else.

[Assistant] Hey, it took two hours to put the damn thing together. I can't get one throat.


[User] And who does the hysterical nursery rhymes for the kids? Little Jack Horner sat in the corner. Something, something poop and pee on.

[Assistant] You got to give the people what they want.


[User] I'm a great example. And yeah, I kid around, but when it's crunchtime, I'm right there.

[Assistant] Oh, yeah. Like the other day when Ali was asking you how babies get here and you suddenly had a sneeze attack and ran out of the roof and.


[User] In forty seven years of marriage, you've never sought in Madison.

[Assistant] Marie, it's bad enough. It needs it. You gotta remind me how long we've been.


[User] No, so if we were to go over your house right now, we wouldn't find any notes.

[Assistant] Absolutely not. And I would like to say, I can't believe that you're all ganging up on an elderly woman. Who hasn't been feeling very well lately? I need to lie down.


[User] we're not gonna get a dog from a breeder whenmillions of dogs are euthanized annually.

[Assistant] if I'm being forced to get a dog,I wanna get something that's big, that's strong,that's strapping like like a boxer named manslaughter oror rot namedbaby.get right.


[User] Oh my God.

[Assistant] Other guide? What is Grandpa died? Heads stop. Okay, these five, these five, the amber. Moss. Hello. Ha. No, oh, yeah, No, no, no. Of course, we didn't forget about Ieda's baptism dinner. Drew was late. He just got here. But we're gonna come right now, okay? Okay.


[User] Look, man, you got to set her straight. This is not right. What are you doing?

[Assistant] I know, but, but I really like her, and I don't want to blow this. You know, I just have to pick the right time to tell it. Got to lay the groundwork.


[User] sweetheartyou okay what

[Assistant] well， my dad learned how to textunfortunatelyhe willnot be coming to the weddingafter allwork emergencyi don't know why i even carei was dreading him comingyou knowi mean he would have nevereven knownif it wasn't for thatdamn magazinei think i let myself geta little excited that thejackass was comingoh my god i am so screwed up


[User] Supposed to be my partner on this? What are you talking about?

[Assistant] Yeah, sure, Go, go.


[User] well, I know she did. butthe fact remains that this is a New Jersey contract.

[Assistant] I know that.but,okay,here,the parties agree that the jurisdiction for resolution ofany custodial disputeshall vest in the court in the state of New Jersey,not New York,New Jersey.


[User] I asked him.

[Assistant] she's, I mean,that's New Jersey. it's right there. I could see it.


[User] I love that dress.

[Assistant] She was new to our school and she wore this princess dress every day for like a month. I use this to sell. Then one day she found the playground and ripped it.


[User] This may come as a shock, too. But what's happening with me has nothing to do with you.

[Assistant] Okay, fine. What does it have to do with I really?


[User] Ah, you can be honest, baby. But don't get mad. It's not worth it.

[Assistant] Ah, well, I'm having a hard time not getting mad way. She's acting stern pots and tells stories and fables that makes me so furious.


[User] Right? Well, okay, so what are we gonna do today?

[Assistant] Oh, this gal I met on the trip. She pinked me. She's at Moma for the Lucian Freud exhibit. I know it's bad timing, but she's only here for the one night and I wanted to see the show anyway, so. You know, I. It's okay with you.


[User] Hey, I paid four bucks for this cookie. I'm giving enough.

[Assistant] I'm sorry. You can have it back when you leave.


[User] we offered industries for people who can't afford to pay,but this is what we call a luxury operation.

[Assistant] luxury.how would judgin.it keeps having these kittens that can't sleep.wonder when the next lots come in.when me? a poor widow woman.


[User] No offense, but dating Kate Moss is like a law in England. Everyone has to do it when they turn twenty one.

[Assistant] His name was Roland Glass and he has two gold records. I can't believe I've never heard of him.


[User] I can your go to jams the soundtrack from Newsies.

[Assistant] Yesterday, a rock star. and today he's gone.


[User] You ordered from Magna cum latte.

[Assistant] Every day when I pass by it, I think two things. One, I wish I had a gun. And two, someday I'm going to order breakfast to be delivered with one of their fancy ass croissants. Who knows? Tonight, I could do too much heroin and die an unexpected death, but at least then I die doing something my mother loved.


[User] Ah, who's for museum?

[Assistant] Cleaning gives me sense of calm.


[User] Yes, of course. You want me to give him something to do? I got it.

[Assistant] I got it bit. Stuffing. Set them down on the ground, Set them down. We shouldn't. We do anything?


[User] yeah, and how's Robert?

[Assistant] that man couldn't handle anything real.they couldn't handle a strong intelligent woman.so he's black history.I'm so happy I ran into you, the legal department today.


[User] Yeah, what are you going to do for me next? right? Take away her naptime.

[Assistant] Look, when a kid misbehaves, you take away something that's important to her. What would you have done?


[User] Come on, look, we don't need classes with great parents. All right. You're a great parent and I'm your lovely assistant.

[Assistant] I don't feel like a great parent. Great parents don't find themselves in the supermarket going. we don't throw plums. I need a class. We need a class.


[User] And off, she's fine.

[Assistant] I think she was overly fine.


[User] I think she was overly fine.

[Assistant] Linnie.


[User] No, come on. This was a big incident.

[Assistant] You stop calling it the incident. It wasn't an incident. But Cuban missile crisis was an incident. My God, if you are this insane about not walking a girl with the door, how do you feel about it? What you do to me?


[User] You stop calling it the incident. It wasn't an incident. But Cuban missile crisis was an incident. My God, if you are this insane about not walking a girl with the door, how do you feel about it? What you do to me?

[Assistant] Look, what am I doing to you?


[User] Okay, but to a hobo, that's like a thousand.

[Assistant] So you gave Scott and walked her money after I asked you not to.


[User] No, no, no. I gave it to him before you ask me not to go.

[Assistant] You do that.


[User] You do that.

[Assistant] Hey, listen, I'm sorry. I'll get the money.


[User] Hey, listen, I'm sorry. I'll get the money.

[Assistant] It's not. Ah, the money.


[User] It's not. Ah, the money.

[Assistant] Then I really don't understand the hateful screaming.


[User] Then I really don't understand the hateful screaming.

[Assistant] You really have so little respect for me that you would do that without asking me.


[User] I respect you.

[Assistant] Obviously not because you wrote the check before you even talk to me about.


[User] Obviously not because you wrote the check before you even talk to me about.

[Assistant] It's because I thought you would say, yeah.


[User] It's because I thought you would say, yeah.

[Assistant] Well, I'm saying no.


[User] Okay, you change your mind. So you, you want to. Get back in the sheets where you look so nice.

[Assistant] I can't believe you did this.


[User] I can't believe you did this.

[Assistant] Okay. Listen, I screwed up. Okay, but I mean, it's my money to screw up with.


[User] We have coffee.

[Assistant] Oh, wow. So when did this become like a thing?


[User] Ah, you did. To be fair, it did work on doctor Lee, but not even a little on my hospital Ceo.

[Assistant] Because you never beat a big boss like that. When I said I use my martial arts training, I meant I focus on my breathing to center myself, so I don't get overwhelmed. That's how you in an argument that.


[User] So you saw that. Welcome inside, good. What happened?

[Assistant] There is an accident. Wait, oh, Ryan was in an accident. I have to go.


[User] You know, when I have to go out.

[Assistant] Okay, were you lindic call? You want to Linux? I want to like, call your mother just like if you can't try like. One second, take, Take a breath for a second. I do not have any time. I can drive you. You want me to drive you?


[User] Okay, were you lindic call? You want to Linux? I want to like, call your mother just like if you can't try like. One second, take, Take a breath for a second. I do not have any time. I can drive you. You want me to drive you?

[Assistant] You don't have to dry from the.


[User] You don't have to dry from the.

[Assistant] Is that to go? You're gonna drive? Give me the key. get open it. I gotta close up next.


[User] Well, you'll have a good twenty minutes when you take me to the airport.

[Assistant] Look, that's not even funny. Would you stop packing? please? come on. We're going to hang out today. We're going to hang out tomorrow, too. And we're going to hang out Sunday. I'm not even going to go to the Super Bowl. What, listen? I know it's hard for you to believe me, but I like spending time with you. And I mean it. I won't go. I won't. I will not go to the Superbowl.


[User] All right, I get what you're trying to.

[Assistant] I'm not trying. All right. I'm going to do it. I'm going to rip up the tickets. Where are they?


[User] No, you know, no, you don't get it. There you go. No, no, no. I don't stop it, baby. I keep going, see. Oh, you maybe you think I could just shake them back together?

[Assistant] So right, don't do it.


[User] Well, what, What exactly are you telling her? I mean, you're not saying that you're not enjoying it.

[Assistant] Why would I tell her that?


[User] I'm doing the father daughter dance.

[Assistant] may I cut in? oh, no. with her.


[User] Oh, you're just saying that to be nine, no.

[Assistant] Listen, why would any normal person put up with us for as long as you have? I don't know. That's, that's right. I was born into this family. I am stuck with them, but. What kind of weirdo I would choose to be one of us. There's something wrong with you.


[User] I just finished my residency. I'm in debt up to my app.

[Assistant] We had a deal. About what would happen if shit went down and when shit went down you?


[User] Sorry, it's just so good. I'm sorry.

[Assistant] Come on, I got, I'm trying to get the flow going. I can't. This is really hard for me and I'm, I'm not good at this.


[User] Who'll shop Aars?

[Assistant] That's right. Ok, I'm a freak. I was a freaking school. It was a freak in my marriage. I'm a freak in my family.


[User] All right, Raymond.

[Assistant] Um, pity. Jenny, I'm joking. You're not a freak.


[User] And a hybrid. So there was virtually no stopping us.

[Assistant] Do not see that movie. You will neither laugh nor cry.


[User] Beats in the city. Not even the best pizza on the streets.

[Assistant] They do not do the hair of the people on those pictures. Totally free checking.


[User] They do not do the hair of the people on those pictures. Totally free checking.

[Assistant] Don't back on it.


[User] Can we please stop talking about them?

[Assistant] You know, she's just going to flush it right down the toilet. Do you know what she got? the kids for Christmas. She got them. electric skateboards and Gopro. What the?


[User] I don't know. The point is that they don't need the top ten tech gadgets of the year, but they need is a college education and.

[Assistant] There is nothing that you could do about this. And I hate to say this, but you are starting to sound just a little bit petty.


[User] So you went and had our conversation with Miss Mckindo.

[Assistant] I ran into her. And can we talk about the real issue here? Our son is being yanked out of his class in the middle of the school year. And we need to figure out how to talk to them about.


[User] I know that's why I wanted to do it at the beginning of the school year.

[Assistant] Oh, so this is my fault. This is all on me. No, is that what you're saying? Can you? I am not doing that to him. I am not gonna do that to him. They'll find a private school. We'll find some sort of way to pay for it. We'll find somebody who knows what they're talking about.


[User] Oh, so this is my fault. This is all on me. No, is that what you're saying? Can you? I am not doing that to him. I am not gonna do that to him. They'll find a private school. We'll find some sort of way to pay for it. We'll find somebody who knows what they're talking about.

[Assistant] Sorry, what? I'm being practical. Let's look at our options. It's not an option.


[User] yes. shame on you.

[Assistant] he was stabbed.Daphne and Lesley were halfway up the aisle.look what happened to them.


[User] we're happily marrieddespite the thing he does with the, um,anyway, it does happen, you know?

[Assistant] well, it's all academic. anyway,Spiro may not love Demetra,but he's wedded to her in every sense. oh,


[User] I believe he's dating a twenty two year old.

[Assistant] What, what? What happened? Whatever makes him happy?


[User] What, what? What happened? Whatever makes him happy?

[Assistant] I was lying. Anyway, that's not real happiness.


[User] I don't know. I think it might be.

[Assistant] Mom, what could they possibly have to talk about?


[User] Max,since you guys are getting serious,why not go on the pillsso every night you won't have to play?what can we turn into a condom?

[Assistant] the pills, like 50 bucks a month.that's more than it cost to raise a damn baby


[User] while your boyfriend's rich, he can afford to pay for it.great. now I'm a white trash mom.

[Assistant] ah,no way. I'm saving deeks fortune for more important thingslike Doritos Dnamita,pretty much the flamen yawn of corn ships.


[User] I mean, I'd be on the pill right now,but the one man interested in me is married,so I guess that's more of a bitter pill.seriously, Max, think about it.

[Assistant] fine. why don't you guys have to take the pill?we have to take all the pills, birth control, midall roofies.


[User] What is that supposed to mean?

[Assistant] Just because my father surprised my mother with a new house and I catastrophically did the same thing. It doesn't make us the same personality.


[User] What's compared to you and me?

[Assistant] Whilst in the middle of a party celebrating my success, would you decide to announce in front of everybody that you bought me a house?


[User] Crazy, am I, yeah?

[Assistant] And when I was living in my car, you were more than willing to come to my rescue because you love being the big, successful man. But guess what? Things have changed.


[User] But no, Cam knows what I mean.

[Assistant] Cam knows that you are mean You are more effusive about tonight's menu than you were in my card. The molten chocolate cake looks slutty and delicious. Would it kill you to say that about me? What the hell? Amanda was here? This picture you post on Facebook. She's right behind. Why would she just leave? Tonight was supposed to be a romantic night. I don't want to watch Luke make his sweaty moves on his conquest of the week.


[User] A little disgusting.

[Assistant] Don't you think? I know that she was my chance to turn it around? Okay, you know what, collar? We'll get on the phone. We'll clear the whole thing up. I called her. She's not picking up. We're going through her apartment. We mess this up. We'll fix it.


[User] Well, it's. Kind of a big deal. I don't know if I want to go into it right now.

[Assistant] Crosbie, if you're back with that bimbo waitress Brandy or that pseudo activist, I don't know. What is the actress?


[User] What do you guys talk?

[Assistant] Who knows? That's why I asked you guys to come over. I need you to kind of. Absorb some of her.


[User] And someone else watched. Please, I suck. I'm going to strike out. Everyone's going to hate me.

[Assistant] Max, listen to me, Max. Max, listen to me. All right, now it it. Does it matter if you get a hit or not, okay? It's a game. It's all about having fun.


[User] Mom's not going with you.

[Assistant] why do you always have to complicate everything?I'm not making this trip twice. this is not a taxi.


[User] she needs care.

[Assistant] care. Louis needs care.Lois, the last person the planet needs care.the woman could survive a nuclear explosion.just Lois nakarcroches.Lois,


[User] He said help.

[Assistant] Really? Really, why didn't Grandpa say that?


[User] Listen, just cut those radishes. Okay, make them in the little roses.

[Assistant] Who am I, Merlin? Come on, give me something a man can do. Let me smash walnuts. Oh, that's the third quarter.


[User] We only split right here, and it doesn't get to watch the game.

[Assistant] Listen, just stir those onions, would you? That's too fast. That's too fast. You're brushing the skin's.


[User] Why didn't you tell me?

[Assistant] Because I haven't been on a date for forty years. And the feed cold.


[User] I could go blind if it keeps shining that thing in my eyes.

[Assistant] Sorry, we just scared me to death. Why we're creeping around back here?


[User] I was in the neighborhood.

[Assistant] The neighborhood you live in London.


[User] Crushing me.

[Assistant] Ah, job, good job, but. I'm a loser. I am such a loser.


[User] Ah, job, good job, but. I'm a loser. I am such a loser.

[Assistant] Come on over, look. no, listen, you're not so. Listen, I feel sorry for myself too sometimes.


[User] Come on over, look. no, listen, you're not so. Listen, I feel sorry for myself too sometimes.

[Assistant] Not like me. I got issues.


[User] Not like me. I got issues.

[Assistant] Moments.


[User] Moments.

[Assistant] Yeah, you like what?


[User] Yeah, you like what?

[Assistant] Like, okay, for instance, you know, I grew up in a nice, normal family. I was used to people being a certain way. And then I married your brother, which is.


[User] no, she was a little jealousI was hanging out with tiny Marge without her. butthe only thing my mom ever worried about was herself.she's selfish.she missed my birth cause she had a thing.

[Assistant] come on,she can't be that bad.turns out you're not that big of a high school dropoutand she's probably not that big of a monster. I mean,she raised you alone and you didn't die.


[User] here. I'll dial you. just leave the message here.

[Assistant] no, Max Farm monster.


[User] just do it.you'll be so happy when you see her there tomorrowif we live through the night.

[Assistant] hey,it's me.MaxBrown hairlived in you for seven and a/2 months due to yourinability to read the warnings of the size of cigarettes.listen,I'm graduating from high school tomorrow.so if you're not busy looking for pills under the stove orselling the neighbor's cat for beer money,watch.come,


[User] Uncle Cameron sent you over here, didn't he?

[Assistant] That's hilarious. Now, I love how you and me can joke like this.


[User] Oh, look, that's dangerous.

[Assistant] I know this is fun about it.


[User] There's a. Peggy is not attracted to me at all.

[Assistant] That's impossible. Um, telling you the things you do and the way you look and drive a woman crazy. Oh, wow. Like your shy little smile.


[User] so what are you eaten?

[Assistant] um, chocolate.but wait,now I'm thinking Red Velvet.10. put my ring in one. when he proposed.


[User] um, chocolate.but wait,now I'm thinking Red Velvet.10. put my ring in one. when he proposed.

[Assistant] oh,he proposed with one of our cupcakes.that's so sweet.


[User] He breaks your heart. You call it off. He does the bend minimum to get you back. And just when you think he's changed, he can breaks your heart again.

[Assistant] I know Hayden comfy, trusted. but what if Lauren comfy either? Chin.


[User] Sorry, but you at a whole people have no right to be angry with her.

[Assistant] I didn't know that she would disappear. Anna, look, we've done that right a million times, okay? I know. I thought I was going to wait, but it was lightning and it got driving and.


[User] I know.

[Assistant] Yeah, hey. Look at that big smile.


[User] I don't really know. I haven't talked to about.

[Assistant] So he was kind of maybe swept up in the just coming home and all the people there. That's how I picture it, right? Like, it's proud. I guess I was asking, did he was it? was it planned for that day? I'm just curious.


[User] So he was kind of maybe swept up in the just coming home and all the people there. That's how I picture it, right? Like, it's proud. I guess I was asking, did he was it? was it planned for that day? I'm just curious.

[Assistant] Was it planned? Um, you mean like, did he? Did he have it written in his calendar that he was going?


[User] It's not like you want to the movies, It's, you know, it's, I just.

[Assistant] Yes, yes, yes, yes. It was obviously planned.


[User] Drake. you really need to calm down, okay?I had no idea that our dogs would make you so angry.

[Assistant] no.you know what makes me angry?people giving more consideration to animals than people.this country was more upsetat Cecil the lion's death than it was about Mike Browns.


[User] So not a space heater.

[Assistant] No, to kill a Mockingbird. First edition.


[User] All right, dad, come on, come on.

[Assistant] Scale of one to ten.


[User] come on, you can do better than that.

[Assistant] bahbah.


[User] how about if we try calling this sheet?maybe they'll come to us,huh?

[Assistant] bah bah.


[User] So I couldn't help, but they fell asleep during Hawaii. Bing Bao.

[Assistant] You know? I know you did this for me. And and and I really appreciate you trying. What is this stuck to my nonstick pan?


[User] Oh no. Actually, I'm getting all the games, you know? And I like watching them without pants.

[Assistant] I know, but like I, I see all these distractions, you know, your mother and the kids, your father, your brother. Your mother. What I'm saying is, if you want to go back to the office, I will understand.


[User] what are you talking about?

[Assistant] terrorizing her with tales of your childhood misery?children are like tender seedlings.we have to protect themand nourish them before they're ready for the outside world.


[User] you went through a lot when you were Caroline's age.you were raped.we're not raped,Nikki.you were pushed into a marriage that wasforcibly consummated.it's only natural to seen Caroline go through adolescentshould freak you out,but she's just being a normal kidand you're just gonna scare her away.

[Assistant] I'm protective of Caroline.it's only because she isn't exactly surrounded by reliablefemale role models.all right,


[User] This is an Aurora sisterhood of the traveling tennis racket situation.

[Assistant] Isn't the whole point of this team to give everyone a chance?


[User] The point is to prove we're not losers by rejecting loser.

[Assistant] Doesn't make any sins. Don't you want to play tennis?


[User] Ah, considering and much he travels. this might be the longest he stayed anywhere.

[Assistant] Oh my goodness. Your little league trophies.


[User] I wasn't expecting to see you here.

[Assistant] That's why I said surprise, yeah.


[User] That sounds like yoga.

[Assistant] I, I realized that, yes, but still, I come on.


[User] I, I realized that, yes, but still, I come on.

[Assistant] I'm not going to do the club by myself. Okay, so let's go and get massages or there's a nail salon there.


[User] No, this is right.

[Assistant] You know, Dad once said that we are related to some famous pirates, so theoretically. We should have no troubles reading, reading this map.


[User] What were you thinking? I made mom file a police reports.

[Assistant] Be nice to me. I'm having a bad day.


[User] the Bill, Bill, Bill.

[Assistant] yes. see,you just pop them out one at a time. they like pens for sluts.


[User] Just came up with me either.

[Assistant] That is exactly why I didn't tell you knew you would be critical to try to talk me out of it. But it's too bad. You know what? I have to be really enjoying myself.


[User] Here. How?

[Assistant] T J, your pies are ready. Dj.


[User] I will do that, oh.

[Assistant] Consent. People live in this freaking house and no one is in the kitchen.


[User] about me, Nikki.about everything I do, about my responsibilities.

[Assistant] we'll try being second wife.you just saw what happened.do you ever considerI have no public life with Bill and you control everything?


[User] we'll try being second wife.you just saw what happened.do you ever considerI have no public life with Bill and you control everything?

[Assistant] well, I'msorry I didn't die.


[User] well, I'msorry I didn't die.

[Assistant] I'm. shut up. how can you say that?how can you say that to mewhen I'm the one that took care of you?


[User] Be cool. You just jangled across the yard like a big country, tambourine.

[Assistant] All right. Well, apparently the fire went out and I didn't notice. And now this pig is as cold as your family is going to be when they figure out I ruined another meal.


[User] she told me you and Marge were two worn out to go.

[Assistant] it's not true.I desperately wanted to go.she's lying her boots off,Bill.she'd rather lie than be honest andadmit that she's ashamed of me and Margineand you and all your animal urges.


[User] Yeah, he loves it, but had he would kill us?

[Assistant] Okay, how about, how about ice skating? ice skating? So I'm.


[User] Randall's college s. it's not that funny.

[Assistant] okay, then go ahead, read him the question. no,read it. all right. all right, I'm on.so the question is,so far, what person has most impacted your life?


[User] no,no.the question is anundermanted softball that you should clobber.

[Assistant] clobber Randall. it's so easy.the whole premise of the question is wrong.no one person can have the Grace I packed on your love.


[User] always women in the bathroom,no matter how many bathrooms.hang on to your garbage too long. you're remake poisoningeven worse.get me. failure.

[Assistant] stop. ping right now. Margie, say back.you filed,man. you don't belong in a house. you belong in a skull.


[User] There's nothing we can do.

[Assistant] Maybe she didn't like living here.


[User] Finish school. Let's stay in touch.

[Assistant] Since when do you have to know trigonometry to get killed for your country? You're going to send them out to do multiplication or guilt out of it. All right, Mom, you know, I wonder you can't win a fucking war.


[User] Yes, it is. There's no reason you shouldn't be attracted to burning, except for all the extra burning.

[Assistant] Even think he's that bad.


[User] Even think he's that bad.

[Assistant] Oh, yes, he is. What come? he knows it. We make fun of them all the time. Blinky, you move the Hinden Burney Mp. Fat boy. He doesn't care. He's, he's your friend. Our fatty fat.


[User] That why you picked him for me? so I wouldn't be attracted to him.

[Assistant] You see, you admit it. You are shallow.


[User] You see, you admit it. You are shallow.

[Assistant] Ah, shallow. I mentioned Linda's name two seconds later to have him sex with her.


[User] It's Dj's fortieth birthday.

[Assistant] I was prepping and I've got tissues, a bottle of wine. Her favorite ice cream? Another bottle of wine. And more ice cream in case she doesn't like the first ice cream.


[User] I really think we should shoot at the beach.

[Assistant] That's a bad idea. It's I, I come on. I told you this. You don't go to the beach for a corporate annual report. not because you're on a budget. You're on a deadline and you're not gonna get the shots.


[User] I just feel like I sold the guy, you know, I got the job because I, I had a vision and he loved the idea of shooting at the beach what? They're here on the.

[Assistant] Kinda well, you got a vision? Yeah, yeah. Okay, you had a vision, but also it. It helps that you. Sleeping with the tuxedo guy, right?


[User] And I say mono.

[Assistant] I didn't. That's not why I got the job. That's so insulting. Think about what you just said to me.


[User] I didn't. That's not why I got the job. That's so insulting. Think about what you just said to me.

[Assistant] Here's the thing. I don't get these jobs because. I don't have the personality they want, okay? but then they, they give it to somebody who has no experience. I don't know yet, no.


[User] Right, but Brandon is my Brandon, my fictional Brandon, well.

[Assistant] You just substituted Brandon for Martin, which doesn't make fiction all.


[User] Imitates life, life.

[Assistant] Okay, but that, that is not art.


[User] I'm talking about.

[Assistant] Our thing are not having sex thing.


[User] Are we still doing that?

[Assistant] Of course, we're still doing it. It's been twenty six days of doing it, not doing.


[User] Sorry, I totally forgot.

[Assistant] Yeah, right.


[User] I think the moment has passed, right?

[Assistant] Okay, that moment has, but. But look, here comes another, hey.


[User] Twenty dollars hard, hard cash for Christina Braberman vote. Presang.

[Assistant] Alright, look, you really want to do this? Yeah, you're not getting one vote. You're getting two votes plus one for Braverman, minus one for Bob Little, your one plus my one is two, Two votes is forty bucks.


[User] This is why this is why I became the captain to lead us through the playoff so we can win it, win.

[Assistant] What I mean, what are you actually winning?


[User] Don't children catch them?

[Assistant] Yeah, they, they catch the ones that come, oh, look, Bali. Oh, but this one came in right arrow.


[User] Yeah, they, they catch the ones that come, oh, look, Bali. Oh, but this one came in right arrow.

[Assistant] At the last minute, it's a drunken pay.


[User] That's just your interpretation, oh.

[Assistant] No, no, no, no, no. You should have seen him in this video. He was full of life, having fun, laughing, gorgeous women draped all over him. He's gotta miss that she.


[User] Still such? tell us everything.

[Assistant] Hey, it's Ok. There's no rush. It's important to find the right person like I knew, right? with cloud because of the way he makes me feel. Was it so romantic? Did your pop pop minded with a tray on the dark and damp? I almost fell in.


[User] Well, how do you know if you asked him?

[Assistant] No, I have not.


[User] You're just bitter because you had to get pregnant to get need to marry you.

[Assistant] I'm bitter. Who's drunk and yelling at a dead woman?


[User] Maybe they wanted to get away from you. That's why I sneak out of the house.

[Assistant] Don't you dare try to turn this around? You insisted on being the disciplinarian. You are the one who said to me, Oh, don't hug them so much. You'll make them soft. Well, obviously I should have never stopped hugging them, oh. I am so sorry. I let this crazy man loose on you.


[User] Don't you dare try to turn this around? You insisted on being the disciplinarian. You are the one who said to me, Oh, don't hug them so much. You'll make them soft. Well, obviously I should have never stopped hugging them, oh. I am so sorry. I let this crazy man loose on you.

[Assistant] Hugging them.


[User] I'm not talking about buying all of the diapers in the world,but this kid is a human outhousemaybe. would you get like an extra box or two?

[Assistant] okay, so it's my fault.it will be really great.just like one time if you could be likemy fault, like you took the blame just for something.just like,hey,what's me?


[User] okay, so it's my fault.it will be really great.just like one time if you could be likemy fault, like you took the blame just for something.just like,hey,what's me?

[Assistant] I take the blame for everything. I am this family's blame.pinyata POW blame scattered on the floor


[User] Yeah, we love our fellows no matter what they're able or unable to do.

[Assistant] Frank, listen, when we heard about your situation, that didn't make us think badly of you, we still think of you as as big, strong, virile, frank and.


[User] Minute, all right, now that's you're making fun of an element.

[Assistant] And else was a trick. What else was not a trick? Your mother coming out here telling me to have sex with you.


[User] Yep, this is what I have to put up with while you're off playing golf. Your mother coming up here and telling me it'll help you relax If I make myself available to you.

[Assistant] Oh my God. Did you just have sex with me? Because my mother told you to. Yeah. So sick. Is that Harry? What did I'm thinking of my mother? We do listen to her.


[User] Oh my God. Did you just have sex with me? Because my mother told you to. Yeah. So sick. Is that Harry? What did I'm thinking of my mother? We do listen to her.

[Assistant] I love you, Ray. I care about you. I'm not the one running off to play golf to get away from.


[User] I love you, Ray. I care about you. I'm not the one running off to play golf to get away from.

[Assistant] You don't think I care about you? Why do you think I'm confessing? Don't you see? I feel guilty. Guilt, guilt. That means love me. Huh, I had to come home and confess.


[User] You don't think I care about you? Why do you think I'm confessing? Don't you see? I feel guilty. Guilt, guilt. That means love me. Huh, I had to come home and confess.

[Assistant] Situated till after we had sex.


[User] Situated till after we had sex.

[Assistant] You're very good looking. I'm sorry. Look, I'm never going to play golf again.


[User] Why occur by E with?

[Assistant] My wife. Okay, my wife. So you just took the last letter of the word and put it in front.


[User] What's the blunt version of that? You kick me as you say it.

[Assistant] Oh, no. I mean, I just read an article about this very thing in the New York Times.


[User] Oh, and just for fun, what would happen if it saved on for, say, I don't know.

[Assistant] Well, they say that. I know. No, you use Joe's cape for this many thing. You know how important this is for him. now. he calls me the Cape chocolate chip cookies. and then Jay.


[User] It's not so hard. I don't know what Chenise is always bitching about. Guess the tissue is.

[Assistant] Can't believe I still haven't slept. I'm gonna be awake forever. It's going to be like that movie awakenings, but not at all.


[User] Can't believe I still haven't slept. I'm gonna be awake forever. It's going to be like that movie awakenings, but not at all.

[Assistant] You can rub me.


[User] Wow, that wig changed you.

[Assistant] No, here. Rub the edge on the bottom of my jammy top. like it's your pillowcase.


[User] I'll do your touchuous.

[Assistant] So attached to it, twirling it, tossing it, flipping it, feeling it on my neck, on my shoulders, on my back. Caroline, chanting without the option of a sleek up to is not Caroline Channing. And I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I judged you for having an attachment to something when I am no better. And I'm sorry, I got rid of your sweet sheet sheets. Max.


[User] you can cuff you and drag you down the hall in yourtowel in front of all your neighbors and thenstuff you under the back of mytruck and take it to the station.not so good for your privacy.

[Assistant] I've heardsome nights he might be at some club up and shot the right.that's all right. nowwait,gave me solid Intel, you're gonna hit me off


[User] We got tea time in thirty minutes.

[Assistant] Relax your undies. I want to show you something before we go.


[User] Um, I'm just saying you can't take it with you.

[Assistant] I thought this place was smoothly protected. Y'all got bells on your doors, broomsticks on your windows. Where were you? I was on and didn't hit nothing.


[User] Can't leave that one sitting there. It'll be too obvious that I did on purpose.

[Assistant] And that's good. Dad should know how you feel. I'm a great believer letting people know what's going on in here.


[User] Yeah, and and every other part of your body. You know, I don't want to get in a fight over a suitcase right before I have to. I'll just do it.

[Assistant] Listen to me. This is not about a suitcase. This is about who wears the pants in the family. I know whose idea was to bring it in the first place. Hers, right?


[User] This is the leader nor Norse pharmaceutical merger.

[Assistant] It, it is hi.


[User] we'll call him and tell them not to.

[Assistant] they just brought me my lunch.


[User] Christina casino.

[Assistant] How terrible.


[User] It was nothing to say about it, neither of.

[Assistant] Yes, you did. You did lie. A doctor gave you the prescription, but.


[User] He gave me those pills and I don't want to take.

[Assistant] Like an oxidating that, um. You can't even tell me you don't even trust me enough to tell me the truth.


[User] The truth is their, their pills that are were given to me for for anxiety. I didn't even want them, and I took, I took two today.

[Assistant] This is the thing. It's not about whether or not you take the pills. It's about the fact that you don't trust me enough, to be honest and tell me.


[User] I'm not hiding anything, anything from you. I'm just having a hard time. Do you understand?

[Assistant] Oh, so am I? I just our time? And I feel alone because I can't find you. So I need some time to think about whether or not this is gonna work in the real world, period, okay?


[User] We've had this conversation before, Justin.

[Assistant] We have when you thought sanctions or some such crap would stop people from flying planes in the buildings.


[User] This turns out to be a war. Then the collateral damage will be Olivia.

[Assistant] Ok, fine. You know what? if he's coming on talking to a man, A man? No, you're not. I know how to get through to this type of guy. And if you can trust to Lydia, you can trust me.


[User] She's getting ready. I think she wants to impress us.

[Assistant] Press, ask me. I'm a nervous wreck. I could hardly sleep. Midnight is a young man's game.


[User] I think that you should call him. Yeah, you were very close to him, much closer than any of us ever.

[Assistant] Stop, and honestly, just like to concentrate on today. And I'm about to meet my new little granddaughter for the very first time. And I want to concentrate on that.


[User] you know, is the car making thatnoise again?

[Assistant] not when I turn up the radio.this is for college until you leave. I'm gonna find as manyways as I can to help you pay for things.


[User] I wanna do more.and there is a lot of stuffaround this house that we don't need.I looked in the car. I've got so much junk in my trunk.I heard it. let's move on.

[Assistant] oh,wow.this is amazing.we're going to make money selling old oven mitts


[User] So kamami you get dressed? Let's go to work.

[Assistant] Really, yeah. This is such a good idea. You will not regret it because I was just getting started. I mean, I was just getting in a groove, you know? And, um, listen, I won't do any of the stuff that was bugging you. Okay, I won't talk about your personal life. Oh, but you're gonna have to take me to work every day this week. Okay, because the car is in the shop. And um, can we play some different?


[User] I'm cool. Yeah, yeah.

[Assistant] How is everything? I went to bed. and you said that you guys are burnt.


[User] It's tons of funny. It is You, me, a six year old.

[Assistant] I have hors d'oeuvres for the living room and then a sit down dinner. You do. And then I have party games, oh.


[User] Oh, yeah, he traded up, yeah.

[Assistant] That's it, Frank. That's it. You are not invited to my birthday party.


[User] That's it, Frank. That's it. You are not invited to my birthday party.

[Assistant] Who needs an invitation? It's in my house.


[User] Who needs an invitation? It's in my house.

[Assistant] Not anymore. I'm going to have it right here at Raymond's house.


[User] Not anymore. I'm going to have it right here at Raymond's house.

[Assistant] Thanks a lot. What do I do? But get it? I'll just go to the lodge with Marco.


[User] Thanks a lot. What do I do? But get it? I'll just go to the lodge with Marco.

[Assistant] You can't. I've already invited him to the party and he's going to pay. Happy birthday to me on the piano.


[User] Honor papa.

[Assistant] Hand meets from Nora there. what? I'm glad it to bar. What's going on, buddy? Nothing, What a beautiful day gets shoes. Yeah, that's a number two, I think. Oh yeah. Yeah, we gotta get a little fresh load there. Listen to me. I have got some great news. We got the rights. Congratulations to the songs. What songs to the Ashes of Rome songs? The three songs we already recorded, the labels said we could have them. You got them to give you those songs. Yes, I did. What deal did you make? They don't know, sweetheart deal. That's all you need to know. You made a sweetheart deal site. But what is the sweetheart deal? It simply traded the studio time for the songs. I, I either think.


[User] And those on the first album.

[Assistant] We talked about this. Well, I said, I'm gonna go get the songs you said, okay? But I didn't really think you would possibly be able to pull it off. Well, that was your mistake. You didn't believe in me. But look at me. I got the songs. You slide by giving away my labor. You're good at all. And you said that they're good songs and he can sing. He's a great singer. You're right. But he is insufferable. And I'm not going to work with him. This is a good thing. All right. so you got a man up. I want you to be excited. The Luncheonette label is alive and well. We're making an album. I'll tell you what. I will, man up if you man up. Alright, deal maker, deal with that for me. Make a deal. Make a deal with the camper on that, okay? I'll see. you would work, alright?


[User] In English, your second language. With all that information in your head, we should be calling you encyclopedia brow. Which sounds like a slur, but isn't? hey, I bet you can help me with something I've been struggling with.

[Assistant] I doubt it cause.


[User] I doubt it cause.

[Assistant] Give me this real. Take a whack at it.


[User] Ok, so the Shangri La Suite has the view, the Jacuzzi and the fireplace.

[Assistant] Are really going through it, doesn't it? Oh boy. We're at the brochure stage.


[User] Are really going through it, doesn't it? Oh boy. We're at the brochure stage.

[Assistant] Thank you very much. bye bye. Okay, come on, come on, come on. we gotta pick one.


[User] Right, why don't I sleep where other people have slept?

[Assistant] What do you think hotels are?


[User] And yelling. Why are you yelling?

[Assistant] You don't want to go anywhere.


[User] You don't want to go anywhere.

[Assistant] I don't believe me. She said nothing. You've mentioned. Sounds fun yet.


[User] I don't believe me. She said nothing. You've mentioned. Sounds fun yet.

[Assistant] Okay, then you pick and whatever sounds fun to you will do.


[User] Yes, right. Because it doesn't matter where we go, as long as we can be together.

[Assistant] All right, let's calm it down.


[User] All right, let's calm it down.

[Assistant] Right? It's just that. Do this.


[User] Not, I'm a poetry scholarship.

[Assistant] I don't see you write me any poems.


[User] I don't see you write me any poems.

[Assistant] I can't. Now, Chad killed poetry. So that's all you got. some rhymes about your manycolored eyeball.


[User] Was hard.

[Assistant] But now is your favorite thing in the world because it reminds you of how strong you are, ah.


[User] You guys want me back?

[Assistant] Yeah, sure. Come on. You're the best player out there. We need you.


[User] You are a piece of work.

[Assistant] Come on, don't you see? It's, it's still in the family. It's just like you are captain only. I'm captain.


[User] Well, thanks for thinking to me, Raymond. But I'm just going to have to pass.

[Assistant] Go and pass. You can't pass, Robbie. We can't do it without you. Come on. You're the missing link.


[User] What are you out of your mind? You're going to pass this up.

[Assistant] What are you talking about? I'm here. I'm helping you with the kids. I'm with the medicine. All right. All right. Not the medicine boom.


[User] What are you talking about? I'm here. I'm helping you with the kids. I'm with the medicine. All right. All right. Not the medicine boom.

[Assistant] Get Terry back on the phone before he hires somebody else.


[User] The sale. I don't get you. What don't you? Aren't you upset that I don't know the kids as well as you, no.

[Assistant] Ray, I mean, look, you did your best. I needed you this morning. and you were there for me. And now I need you tonight to go make the money.


[User] I already told you your mask competition is being reviewed by the school boards.

[Assistant] I know I periodically send them passionate emails, but this is about.


[User] We tried to do this before and we would have succeeded if it wasn't for Stephanie Mackenzie.

[Assistant] Stephanie Mckenzie, a former student rep and current freshman class president. What did she do? Who am I kidding? What didn't she do? Her term was the most productive in Orange Bay history. How did she stop you?


[User] Oh my God, our old apartments.

[Assistant] I know I was noodling around on Airbnb a couple of weeks ago and it was just right there listed here.


[User] You saw what it said. What, what did it say?

[Assistant] I don't know. Toast Pro, Who cares?


[User] Thank you. No, this is just a list of toys. None of the kids names are next to them.

[Assistant] Oh, oh. you know what? We will look at pictures of cow in line and then match the kids up behind him with the toys on the lid. Okay, so.


[User] Where you going, Kate?

[Assistant] Atlantis Morris is signing copies of Jack Little Pillar jury's records. Dad, come on. No one good ever comes to Pittsburgh. And now by some gift of God, Atlantis Morris set my favorite artist in the history of the world is coming out.


[User] Alex, you've only been running the company for two weeks. Just give it time.

[Assistant] And this, this all looks amazing. Seriously, wow, I know.


[User] I know, But even if she did read it, how she cracked the cold.

[Assistant] You got a code? What was the code?


[User] Okay, say something to me in your code.

[Assistant] Why occur? What? I'm, I'm answering you in the code.


[User] all the respect, Bill,your taker to leave it ultimatum was not a negotiation.

[Assistant] I do not want to cut a deal. I want to crush him.he throw my family to the wind like leavesand I want to bring him to his knees.


[User] I don't know how to fix a radio.

[Assistant] Then your views that was left in my life for nothing.


[User] You're gonna let them spend the night together when you know they're having sex.

[Assistant] Well, save it, Marianna. I want to hear it. You're, you're a freaking towel too. Who likes to hurt a little girl on the playground? Hey, Susan, Lexi had sex and I feel left out, so I'm gonna tell.


[User] Because we knew you were going to get your feelings.

[Assistant] No, you knew what you were doing was messed up or you wouldn't have been hiding it. Don't mind his ears. You know, it's exactly the same.


[User] And gave us his card that I threw away.

[Assistant] That I fished out of the trash. That was him on the phone. They're shooting a children's furniture store, commercial two day and they want Lily.


[User] oh, whoa. okay, okay, Dre,you're the one that wanted me to stay home.

[Assistant] yes, but I thought you'd be doing a lot more than this.what do you mean? okay,for starters,not sleeping all more.


[User] yes, but I thought you'd be doing a lot more than this.what do you mean? okay,for starters,not sleeping all more.

[Assistant] I had no idea you were monitoring my time. dray.what exactly you want me to be doing?


[User] we've been married for 20 years. mm hmm.so you thought it was gonna get some free time and just likemagically become a different person?yes. oh, god.okay, wait for me.

[Assistant] okay, well, no, but babe,you've got to start doing something. what?a kept womanisn't a good look on you.


[User] Policy to do attractions. Here it is.

[Assistant] Do you see this? This is Tanya in the print in Bazuka Joe comic strip.


[User] Do you see this? This is Tanya in the print in Bazuka Joe comic strip.

[Assistant] Well, we had a good run and we made history.


[User] what are you talking about?

[Assistant] 6th floor,County Services building.


[User] You three don't get a bed right now, I'm. Just. Comb chairs.

[Assistant] You know what, Robert is. He's a competitive, selfish, little tiny pea grain giant and a hack.


[User] What are you talking about?

[Assistant] He waited till there was an opening, and then he stuck into the hospital to steal my thunder.


[User] Why was Robert at the hospital?

[Assistant] To steal my thunder. He comes in there with his idiotic little Timmy doll and his lame jokes and his lips moving all around around. Raymond, what are you here for? Your emergency nose reduction?


[User] well,you know what,dray?you get what you deserve.you put your selfish feelings aboutdogs above everybody else's.

[Assistant] am I being selfish?we have enough going on with our family and our kids.I just didn't want another thing to be responsible for.


[User] I imagine name calling and someone throwing a shoe.

[Assistant] It was fantastic. I mean, you know, your mother did start out with her usual little remarks, but I just let it roll right off of me. I laughed. I joked. I didn't.


[User] that totally makes sense.yeah. schools have sweets for families.they do.

[Assistant] we could be one of the family, the three of us.


[User] Do you think this is cosmic payback for me and Kitty for when we were?

[Assistant] Sarah, for God's sake, you shut up. Simon called. He left two messages this morning.


[User] So if I went out to the garage, take a picture for a scrapbook. There'd be no surprises.

[Assistant] I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it. I just made a mistake.


[User] I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it. I just made a mistake.

[Assistant] Yeah, a big mistake. You're making me look really bad here. I told mom you were ready for this.


[User] Um.

[Assistant] National security, right? And where are their headquarters located? Langley, oh my God, Sarah. Kitty's working for the Cia.


[User] Sorry, got stuck at the office. How was your day?

[Assistant] It was good. Oh, you know what? Debbie stood me up for lunch. Brood, right, no.


[User] Oh, oh, no, it's worse. Those are walls.

[Assistant] And I hate wasps, Not you, Mr Fletcher, that. Victoria. Phil got me to invest in a mini mall, so you might want to dial back on the shoe purchases for a while.


[User] I gave her the money. The only reason that you have it is she was so mad at me at the time that she refused to accept it. This is not about two million dollars for. This is about her accepting me again. The only thing I don't understand is why you're so upset about it. Is that because you're trying to protect Justin's interest?

[Assistant] And you should know that this has nothing to do with Justin.


[User] Yeah, in three months.

[Assistant] Right? And I want to go a little party for. And I was thinking of inviting our friend Lance. But I don't know what man asked me.


[User] You think there's something going on?

[Assistant] I don't. I, I hope. Not, but his reaction was so. Dramatic to mine. But I don't know if he's trying to justify something on his end.


[User] Julia, people have their ups and downs and make mistakes, and I just can't imagine that Joel won't forgive you and understand all you have is not going to go away because of half a second.

[Assistant] I really hope you're right. I'm glad to hear you say that. I just don't want them to leave me.


[User] You know, it's gonna leave you. Nobody's gonna leave you, ah.

[Assistant] Okay, okay, thank you. Give me a, we made a little mistake. That's, yeah, thank you.


[User] I want our business to have a line I want to sell out. I want people to turn against each other for our products again.

[Assistant] I could just take my top off.


[User] I could just take my top off.

[Assistant] I know. And thank you. We have that in our back pocket. But I have an idea. We can try first. I'm gonna use work words now. So listen up, skunk.


[User] I read in the Wall Street Journal that there's a whole black market for cronauts on Craigslist.

[Assistant] Gregs list. Oh no, I don't want one bad enough to let some guy lick my armpit for an hour again.


[User] Gregs list. Oh no, I don't want one bad enough to let some guy lick my armpit for an hour again.

[Assistant] We'll sell them at our window just to attract attention. And then when they sell out, we'll effortlessly switch to Cuffcakes classic bacon switch.


[User] Yeah. Tell her. I'm so sorry. I've always loved her.

[Assistant] He says he's so. And then he's. You.


[User] Please come up and talk.

[Assistant] His life would be empty without you. I'm sorry. I'm going on script. It just felt right.


[User] I borrowed your phone last. I got to go.

[Assistant] So who was that was like your boyfriend or something? then? who was it? How they have my number now? Who was it?


[User] Hey, Chris.

[Assistant] Oh my gosh. Hi, how are you? Nice surprise. Yeah, I just, I thought I'd pop in. I wanna, I wanna talk to you about Hattie. You know this boy, Alex, right? He works at the food bank.


[User] Right, so what you're saying is basically that Adam and I are making a mistake by not letting her date a nineteen year old recovering alcoholic that lives alone. No, no, no. That's exactly what it's exactly what you're saying. I'm so stupid that even came over here.

[Assistant] Not when I'm sick.


[User] Not when I'm sick.

[Assistant] You could have called Camille.


[User] my desk is very, very Missy.

[Assistant] I have four kids all dabbling heavily in the arts.right. my desk is 99 percent paste in pasta. come on.plus, you can't pass out a gift from a child.


[User] I'm in. You're a little harsh with the kid, right?

[Assistant] How was I harsh? I was not harsh. He, he was off the rails. This is our place of, you know, work.


[User] Oh my, I just was walking down, okay?

[Assistant] No, no, it is not Ok. I was driving around like some nut job looking for you.


[User] That I wanted to be cautious about this. I didn't want to get excited. But you, you pushed and you pushed. So congratulations, Toby. He got me excited, yeah.

[Assistant] Well, I'm not going to apologize about being excited. We didn't lose the baby because we got our hopes up, right? All right. It just happened that.


[User] Murray has huge accounts receivables.we can lean on collections to get payments movingto help ride this out.but even here in Sandy,we lost three big commercial accounts already.

[Assistant] and one day we'll replace them.how?well, I don't know how, don, but we'll figure that out, too.and call the landlord about an easement to get rid of the GDprotesters out front.


[User] no, she said she already holds the priesthood, Dawn.

[Assistant] well, that's just not right.what's going on with us here, Bill?no one's ever tried to kill me before.I'm having nightmares over it.


[User] Out of my chair, Max.

[Assistant] Tomorrow, Max, tomorrow, listen, we'll do it tomorrow.


[User] She hasn't slept since yesterday and is furious because I won't give her a sleeping pill.

[Assistant] Smart move. Stephen. Bill's mess you up. I took one watch, woke up a day later on the roller coaster ride in Corney Island.


[User] Holy mackerel. This is good salmon. I feel like they missing out.

[Assistant] I don't want to eat the fish. They are my friend.


[User] Yeah, you're right, You're right. You know, sometimes when I do, I do a little thing with my chin. Oh, right.

[Assistant] So, Deborah, your hair is looking odd. Thank you. It's not as, yeah, as it was when you were pregnant. Thank you. What are you doing?


[User] You and your big mitts. That's why we can't have pets.

[Assistant] My funny lady. But look out for Mr big hands.


[User] What are you talking about?

[Assistant] Your mother. I went over there and I called her mom, and she turned me down.


[User] But you're never more sexy than when you're pathetic.

[Assistant] That a mood has been hiding right behind. Pathetic, that's. Dad is brilliant. I never would have thought to look there.


[User] No, I don't. We could have worked on things. That's what people do in a marriage.

[Assistant] Neck. We did try. And eventually, I had make a choice. How can I move the kids away from all this in their schools and their friends? I don't have the courage or the confidence or the money to fight you in court. I was a mess and. So I moved to New York where I had friends and I could get help. I never wanted to stop being a mother.


[User] Did you tell Kevin he couldn't come see me after what?

[Assistant] Of course I did. One, he was what, fourteen or fifteen? He was a kid. You couldn't get in and out of the city. It was unlocked down. Of course, I told him he couldn't go.


[User] But what you? You, you made a thing.

[Assistant] Not that Raymond. I'm not a prude. In the female body is a beautiful.


[User] Ok, Ok, Ok. So, so what is it? What's bothering him?

[Assistant] It's supposed to be an abstract. The teachers told us that we could make any kind of a statue we wanted. And so I chose an abstract because I thought it was easy enough. Turns out I can't even do that.


[User] Deborah thinks it looks like a sailboat.

[Assistant] Something wrong with her. I just tried to. Do something different. Find something new. That's all. Something more than just being a short order. Cook for your father.


[User] No, I mean, come on. Well, you look, you made something here.

[Assistant] It was an accident.


[User] So that what we're doing, we're keeping score now. Really? Let me ask you this. How does someone fall in love with someone just like that, huh? Out of the blue without any encouragement, Lena. Does it just happen? This is something she'd caught like a virus or a cold is a contagious.

[Assistant] I'm not trying to fight you here. I'm trying to fight for us. Are you asking me if I liked the attention? Because, yes, yes, I did. I liked it. I'm not saying that I encouraged it, but I admit that I didn't do enough to stop. Why not?


[User] open. she spoke with Roman.he'd rather the investigation go away.they have a state get involved in it.

[Assistant] Gee, that's good to hearbecause that's what I wanted to tell you.I've had time to think clearly.you people can say what you want,but if anyone comes to investigate me,I'm just gonna tell the truth.


[User] She doesn't want to use Turkey.

[Assistant] It's not used. It's brand new. It has no coody.


[User] uh, to manage the assets and the UEBS trust to manage assets

[Assistant] for a polygamous sect.the UEB is just a frontfor organized crime,a racket.those assetsshould be seized or admitted to the state to compensate forwelfare fraud and tax evasion.


[User] So done.

[Assistant] My God, I didn't turn. I didn't even turn. So you forget it. There's no way I can ever go out with her.


[User] And she occurred.

[Assistant] No, the whole time. She'll know that all I'm thinking about is a breast.


[User] But some reason your father had something to hide.

[Assistant] I don't believe in test. All they do is deal with book smarts. They don't measure street smarts.


[User] I am very streetsmart.

[Assistant] I want to tell you about the time he bought seafood out of the back of a derelict car.


[User] I want to tell you about the time he bought seafood out of the back of a derelict car.

[Assistant] He was legit.


[User] He was legit.

[Assistant] Oh, he got the prizes tattooed on his body.


[User] Oh, he got the prizes tattooed on his body.

[Assistant] One band muscle in a whole bucket.


[User] One band muscle in a whole bucket.

[Assistant] I threw up for three weeks so you could save seventy nine cents.


[User] I threw up for three weeks so you could save seventy nine cents.

[Assistant] They were delicious. You could taste the ocean.


[User] you keep saying that,but it seems to me this,this lunatic idea in Avenue Husbandwas made by someonedesperate not to be identified as a polygamistso she could save her business reputation.

[Assistant] that's not true.just stop.what is the big deal?everyone hasturning around hysterical like it's the end of the world.can someone tell me what I'm missing? it's not real.it is a paper marriage. it is not real,


[User] and who bought the honeycomb?

[Assistant] they did.next. it'll be fun.oh, come on. how hard could it be?look, I get up tomorrow, I get a job here. zippity boo.get another job there. now I got 20,000 and zippity pound,make another 20. zippity zang. then I'm lousy with honeycomb.


[User] I don't know, Maybe stop them.

[Assistant] It wouldn't do any good.


[User] well, just hold on a minute.it's a top school.

[Assistant] I don't like it.and those nons are very abrasive.


[User] Oh, they say Dr Pelican is the best. A miracle worker. A behavior is. So he works a changing behavior. You know, that could be good. That could help Max maybe get out of his pirate fasting.

[Assistant] Forget about Pelican Pelican, but because no one gets in to see Pelican, he's an elusive ass. He's like the Bob Dylan of autism.


[User] You know what? I want to give this a shot. I, I may have some connections. So how do you spell that? T e l?

[Assistant] Pelican, like like a bird, but with a cake.


[User] We made dinner. stay for dinner.

[Assistant] Stephen, did we already make? Well, we didn't make.


[User] Stephen, did we already make? Well, we didn't make.

[Assistant] No, no, really. We have. I got to preheat the oven, but it's gluten free. Pasta is really good.


[User] No, no, really. We have. I got to preheat the oven, but it's gluten free. Pasta is really good.

[Assistant] It's actually good. You should get used to it.


[User] that's not happening.

[Assistant] well, if you don't do it, my crack pop brother will.it's what our heavenly father wants for you.can't you see thatyou're not meant to be some grubby politician?you know that? you knew it even then,


[User] dude.when,what are you talking about?

[Assistant] I was just a little girl, but I remember.it's like you have this light around youbecause you were the rightful heir, like the story said,driven off by my father because he feared your power. Nikki,


[User] I'm not your father.you're not your mother.

[Assistant] I don't wanna be my mother.but if you're not the prophet, then I don't know who we are,what we're doing or what this marriage means anymore.it all just completely falls apart on me, Bill.


[User] They asked for the hot wand.

[Assistant] Better pigs. Do they call me anything else? So thanks to all the perverts in town, I realized I still have a few good years ahead of me.


[User] Well, it sounds like he just doesn't want his mom to go with him on the field trip.

[Assistant] Well, honey, I don't know. a big deal. It is a big deal. Ok? it's a long bus ride. He's going to spend the night at a hotel. He's going to be around kids. He's not normally around. You know, I just want to be there to help. You know, it's just, it is. It's a big deal. There's going to be so many things on this trip that are going to be hard for him. He just doesn't know it yet.


[User] I probably would have won if you'd let me do it by.

[Assistant] I know. Yeah, I'm sorry. I made it all about me. You know, your project was really great. You taught our family so many ways to help the planet. You really did make a difference. Are you still mad at me?


[User] I know. Yeah, I'm sorry. I made it all about me. You know, your project was really great. You taught our family so many ways to help the planet. You really did make a difference. Are you still mad at me?

[Assistant] I'm not mad. I'm just disappointed. And I hope you learned a good lesson, young lady.


[User] Green ribbon or not? In my book, you are always a winner. I love you so much.

[Assistant] I love you too, mommy. Hey, I have a few hours of homework left. Can I have another red bowl? I am starting to crash.


[User] I love you too, mommy. Hey, I have a few hours of homework left. Can I have another red bowl? I am starting to crash.

[Assistant] Absolutely not. A good parent again.


[User] um, Grammy, huh?are you sure you know how to do math? of course I do.

[Assistant] but this must be that new math.see, back in my day, there were only 48 states,dinosaurs were lizards, and there were only nine numbers.


[User] That they feel safe, safer already.

[Assistant] Uh, I sort of let you know if you ever need any help. I'm like pretty much a Mariner.


[User] Uh, I sort of let you know if you ever need any help. I'm like pretty much a Mariner.

[Assistant] Uh, I sort of let you know if you ever need any help. I'm like pretty much a Mariner.


[User] Yes, yes, yes, that's right.

[Assistant] Yeah, had done that incorrectly.


[User] You like normal sex, yeah.

[Assistant] Normal sex. You know, the way normal people do it. We normal people. People have sex, right, yeah.  Presume so. They don't turn it all into some fantasy or get drunk or smoke hot to make it interesting.


[User] That's why people fail tests because they're too easy. And besides, you ever heard ankle?

[Assistant] Ah, so by driving away, you know what?


[User] He's a sensitive.

[Assistant] For free, he's not sick.


[User] Um, okay.

[Assistant] Full over.  Pull over now. Why are you crying?


[User] Full over.  Pull over now. Why are you crying?

[Assistant] Why do you hate me?


[User] Hell, Haley, I don't hate you. You seem like a nice girl. You remind me of my daughter, which is why I want you to live a long and happy life and be safe and. And that hurt my daughter.

[Assistant] I really want my license. I've been practicing a lot, I swear.


[User] Since when did you care so much about what people wear?

[Assistant] Excuse me. Who wouldn't let me buy the dress I wanted yesterday?


[User] I'm starting to think you shouldn't go to this party tonight.

[Assistant] Oh, what? Stop, it's not fair. You promise? I've never promised.


[User] We're gonna give you tuners, alright?

[Assistant] My damn husband is in trial. You know, there's no cell phones allowed in there. Just, I hate him. You know, I just don't know why I'm married him. I hate lawyers.


[User] does. it's your dog.

[Assistant] it's our,it's our dog.


[User] okay.it's our dog, but it's your shit.

[Assistant] it's our shit. it's our shit. good girl. okay.


[User] hello, Randall.that's a nice shirt.

[Assistant] thank you.it's a big day.


[User] I've got to go.

[Assistant] it wouldlet me walk with you.


[User] You can get hard living with Marjorie. Try living with my mother. She is the reason I don't bring guys home. Well, she's one of the reasons.

[Assistant] Does Bonnie freak out when you accidentally throw up the valve pack? Damn it to hell, you throw up the valve back.


[User] Does Bonnie freak out when you accidentally throw up the valve pack? Damn it to hell, you throw up the valve back.

[Assistant] That is such a Marjorie word, Valpak. Oh, you know, it's another good one. Trash bag. Tammy, I found a valve pack in the trash bag.


[User] It's so bad. Why don't you save up some money and get your own place?

[Assistant] I have enough money now. I'm crushing it with the handy man stuff. William Sonoma has me fixing stuff there for the next three weeks. Did you know that they make pasta with zucchini? Newsflash, still vegetables and.


[User] Had to get ready for work. It's fine.

[Assistant] Up saying that, please stop saying it's fine, fine doesn't mean fine. The scale goes great, good, okay, not okay. I hate you, fine. You find me fine to be great, but it doesn't, okay.


[User] Up saying that, please stop saying it's fine, fine doesn't mean fine. The scale goes great, good, okay, not okay. I hate you, fine. You find me fine to be great, but it doesn't, okay.

[Assistant] You're right. It's not fine. It sucks. I'm hurt. You're the one person I care most, no.


[User] You're right. It's not fine. It sucks. I'm hurt. You're the one person I care most, no.

[Assistant] Ah, you are the one person I care the most about.


[User] I think you gotta be rich to have a houseand a boat on the lake.

[Assistant] I won't be. I'm going to be a doctor,maybe a surgeon.


[User] Now be my boyfriend.

[Assistant] Town.


[User] Town.

[Assistant] Are you get to? I'm at dancing. There you go, here.


[User] I'm typing like crazy and sending in chapters dated back to July. It's good. Is it work it? I don't think so. I think they just don't think I can tell time.

[Assistant] Business at the. Well, I would think that you'd be a little happier.


[User] yes. oh, I'm a huge Buffy fan. huge.

[Assistant] yes. okay. all right. so can we adopt you?can we tell him? can we,you know, is that crazy? okay. it's crazy.


[User] I'm going to go, but I will stop by justice tonight and say goodbye.

[Assistant] All right, okay. Kill up you.


[User] you mean you knew about this little snut,you decided not to report it?

[Assistant] yeah. no,no. wait. what?


[User] All right. Other than the crime, has she been acting differently?

[Assistant] No, no, She's been acting normal. Oh no.


[User] What did you do?

[Assistant] Nothing. Why you leave me here?


[User] She was going to talk.

[Assistant] She did talk. And then I had a talk. Heat test.


[User] Okay, well, sweetie, I get that, but it's dad's night. so you gotta stay over there.

[Assistant] I don't wanna stay at daddy's stupid apartment. The bedroom's too small and it smells like. Okay, like, but Jomas are our Haas and I want to sleep with you.


[User] I am not you. okay? You can make any choice you want. and I support you. I, I absolutely.

[Assistant] You don't agree. Don't have to agree with you. But God, guess you do for you.


[User] You don't agree. Don't have to agree with you. But God, guess you do for you.

[Assistant] And I'm going to be there for you every.


[User] And I'm going to be there for you every.

[Assistant] I don't want you don't agree with my biggest light. So I said I'm ever. Have to agree. It does have to be there for you, which is what I mean. It doesn't know. You don't think that I should get married well.


[User] I don't want you don't agree with my biggest light. So I said I'm ever. Have to agree. It does have to be there for you, which is what I mean. It doesn't know. You don't think that I should get married well.

[Assistant] I don't think you should get married, but it doesn't mean that I'm not boy, really avoid.


[User] I don't think you should get married, but it doesn't mean that I'm not boy, really avoid.

[Assistant] Why are you doing that? I have to.


[User] Oh, no, no, Nicole, this is a staff meeting. You asked us to be here.

[Assistant] Oh. Here you go, K tow. Yes, I wanted to talk to you all about something very important. So what plant has been revered for its healing properties for millions of euro? I love to you too, but let's stay focused. Pepper.


[User] It's on panic. We'll just, we'll tell Amelia what happened. and then we'll pay to have a claim.

[Assistant] But if it can't be cleaned, Mitchell.


[User] Okay, okay, Then we'll pay for a new run.

[Assistant] Are you insane? This is a limit edition Alpaca handmade stark rug. I saw it in Architectural Digest. It cost fifty thousand dollars. It was in Diane Keaton's house. Oh no, it was in. Oh, what's your name? Is House from Prince's Honor from Ah, oh, oh. She was in Adam's family and.


[User] Are you insane? This is a limit edition Alpaca handmade stark rug. I saw it in Architectural Digest. It cost fifty thousand dollars. It was in Diane Keaton's house. Oh no, it was in. Oh, what's your name? Is House from Prince's Honor from Ah, oh, oh. She was in Adam's family and.

[Assistant] Angelica Houston, Oh, yeah.


[User] I just saw it on Tv.

[Assistant] This is a, a, a, a, a, oh, this is a disaster.


[User] This is a, a, a, a, a, oh, this is a disaster.

[Assistant] Can you believe what this is going to do to the community?


[User] Can you believe what this is going to do to the community?

[Assistant] Why would you let your son, Chris, write a story like this when I'm trying to get re-elected?


[User] Why would you let your son, Chris, write a story like this when I'm trying to get re-elected?

[Assistant] What you worried about being reelected when my son is out there about to be snipped to death by a silica killer? Is that what you say to me?


[User] You feel better now.

[Assistant] Oh wow. It looks almost lunchtime. Isn't this like walk or happy hour for you guys? Maybe you should crack open a few bottles of wine so you can actually sit in a room without killing each other. You know what? I think? I think it's all of you guys have the problem.


[User] So you don't hurry.

[Assistant] Stop it, stop it.


[User] Got some guns there, mom.

[Assistant] I know, I know I work out. I got to, right? Doesn't you are. You haven't seen. Anna, have you?


[User] Mom, I'm interested. I'm asking you, what did you say to the guy to make him cry?

[Assistant] Well, I can't describe it to you. You had to be there.


[User] Yeah, hey, no more complaints from you. Okay, no, I'm talking about, yeah. This and what did mom and dad say about the toaster?

[Assistant] Oh, we're heading back then. Now. I only got him a soft toilet seat, I guess. Guess I'm going to happen now. I don't know. Write a poem on it because of. But really, the reason why I came by was to. Say thank you. Sweet and thoughtful. Yeah, all right. I mean it.


[User] If you're referring to my writing.

[Assistant] All right. all right. Look, honey, I know you feel bad. and I'm sorry. your book's not coming out, but got a great job. And a family who loves you.


[User] So what you always say, oh.

[Assistant] Okay, fine. That's it. I'm done. You just mope away, Moby.


[User] Okay, fine. That's it. I'm done. You just mope away, Moby.

[Assistant] Hey, look, you don't understand.


[User] I know, I'm just, I'm not allowed through this year.

[Assistant] What if we did something to you guys? Yeah, we do everything, we promise.


[User] Ok, so if you do everything, then technically, I'm not breaking the rules. Okay, what do you have in mind?

[Assistant] Oh, who might dinner get aliens in there?


[User] Yeah, the macaroni shoe and souls. I made this William fifth grade. They look good. Did you ever use them?

[Assistant] No, but a year your father was laid off. We almost had to eat them. And what about this? A box of macaroni.


[User] Do you have any idea how late it is?

[Assistant] I don't know. but who cares where at sea?


[User] Where have you been?

[Assistant] With my friends, we sang Carousel and practically all the fiddler on the roof. I was Tavia.