[User] I just have two airline ticket screenshots from brad we're going to come oh,

[Assistant] Oh my god, can I show you something?


[User] Oh my god, can I show you something?

[Assistant] Oh my gosh, show me, show me,


[User] He sent me, he sent me. He sent me this. We have reservations for next wednesday, six oclock ruchasmasias.

[Assistant] Gosh, I love that man. I love that man. I can't believe i'm gonna get to marry him. Oh, my gosh. I can't wait.


[User] Gosh, I love that man. I love that man. I can't believe i'm gonna get to marry him. Oh, my gosh. I can't wait.

[Assistant] New cat new man everything is gonna be perfect


[User] New cat new man everything is gonna be perfect

[Assistant] I mean, yeah. I mean, i'm i'm really got to get this cat now. There's so much going on in my life. I'm so excited.


[User] Abby, Abby, I have some news. I have news. I know. Uhm, so, Brian took me. I'm sorry, I got so excited, I don't even know what I'm saying. Uh, Brian took me. Okay, so, he made the best little gondola reservation right by the pier, and, and we went to this gondola, and he bought these, like, little kayaks, so we started in the gondola, and then we got in the kayaks, and I know this isn't making sense yet, but we ended up, he proposed to me!I'm getting married!

[Assistant] What, oh, my god,


[User] What, oh, my god,

[Assistant] I'm getting married!I know, I can't believe it, I thought it would never happen.


[User] I'm getting married!I know, I can't believe it, I thought it would never happen.

[Assistant] My god show me the ring show me the ring show me the ring.


[User] My god show me the ring show me the ring show me the ring.

[Assistant] Okay, okay, it's a a pink diamond. It's like a pear-shaped little pink guy. It's so cute. Like, it's perfect. I don't know how he knew me so well. He didn't even ask me for what I liked. He just knew. He just like he just knew. It's so perfect.


[User] Okay, okay, it's a a pink diamond. It's like a pear-shaped little pink guy. It's so cute. Like, it's perfect. I don't know how he knew me so well. He didn't even ask me for what I liked. He just knew. He just like he just knew. It's so perfect.

[Assistant] My god, that's gorgeous. I love it, and it matches so well with everything that you have oh my gosh,


[User] My god, that's gorgeous. I love it, and it matches so well with everything that you have oh my gosh,

[Assistant] I know, I know, so he took us on these little kayaks and then he took us, we, we kayaked up the river and he had my whole family waiting there, like my mom, my dad, my sisters, and he asked me to marry him, got down on one knee, helped me out of the kayak, and it was just like we could immediately celebrate with family, it was just beautiful. And my mom was so happy, she started crying, she was like, I never thought this day would come, and it was amazing. Okay, so the, the reason I called you like so fast though, I wanna know if you would be one of my bridesmaids.


[User] I know, I know, so he took us on these little kayaks and then he took us, we, we kayaked up the river and he had my whole family waiting there, like my mom, my dad, my sisters, and he asked me to marry him, got down on one knee, helped me out of the kayak, and it was just like we could immediately celebrate with family, it was just beautiful. And my mom was so happy, she started crying, she was like, I never thought this day would come, and it was amazing. Okay, so the, the reason I called you like so fast though, I wanna know if you would be one of my bridesmaids.

[Assistant] Wait, I think you mean to say, maid of honor!


[User] Wait, I think you mean to say, maid of honor!

[Assistant] Okay, so yes, yes, a hundred percent maid of honor. I was gonna get there. You ruined my lead up. I was gonna like, I was gonna offer you bridesmaid and then you were gonna be maybe a little bit disappointed internally, but then you were gonna accept it.


[User] Okay, so yes, yes, a hundred percent maid of honor. I was gonna get there. You ruined my lead up. I was gonna like, I was gonna offer you bridesmaid and then you were gonna be maybe a little bit disappointed internally, but then you were gonna accept it.

[Assistant] I'm super disappointed. I'm your i'm your sister from a different mister. You can't do that to me.


[User] I'm super disappointed. I'm your i'm your sister from a different mister. You can't do that to me.

[Assistant] I know I know yeah so yeah you're my sister from another mister how could I not I couldn't choose between my two sisters for the maid of honor so of course yes it's you


[User] I know I know yeah so yeah you're my sister from another mister how could I not I couldn't choose between my two sisters for the maid of honor so of course yes it's you

[Assistant] Um my god I know i'm so I just you know, i'm just joking. Obviously, your sister's going to be your maid of honor. But i'm so excited. Of course, I want to be your I want to be your bridesmaid.


[User] Um my god I know i'm so I just you know, i'm just joking. Obviously, your sister's going to be your maid of honor. But i'm so excited. Of course, I want to be your I want to be your bridesmaid.

[Assistant] I want you to be the maid of honor because it's going to cause so much fighting between the two sisters. Like, I don't think I want to have any drama around the wedding. Of course I was going to lead up to it.


[User] I want you to be the maid of honor because it's going to cause so much fighting between the two sisters. Like, I don't think I want to have any drama around the wedding. Of course I was going to lead up to it.

[Assistant] Really, oh my god, I would love to be, oh, oh my god, oh my god, I'm gonna plan so many different things for you. I'm gonna make sure that you have the best, I'm gonna make sure that you have the best wedding shower and the bridal shower and everything and, oh, your sister's gonna be like your maid of honor anyway because I'm gonna make sure that they feel super special and important and that they're given delegations on the day. Oh my god, and we're gonna make sure that all of the hems and everything are just, everybody gets something original so that you don't feel like you have to choose between people. I'm gonna make it super equal for you on the day, okay?


[User] Really, oh my god, I would love to be, oh, oh my god, oh my god, I'm gonna plan so many different things for you. I'm gonna make sure that you have the best, I'm gonna make sure that you have the best wedding shower and the bridal shower and everything and, oh, your sister's gonna be like your maid of honor anyway because I'm gonna make sure that they feel super special and important and that they're given delegations on the day. Oh my god, and we're gonna make sure that all of the hems and everything are just, everybody gets something original so that you don't feel like you have to choose between people. I'm gonna make it super equal for you on the day, okay?

[Assistant] Love you so much, thank you so much.


[User] And not going to have to worry about a single thing. I'm going to make sure everything is taken care of for you.

[Assistant] I know because I know you and I know how you keep binders and I know how you keep tabs of things. So I figured you'd be like the most organized person to do this job. And of course, like oh, my gosh, I need to know where you got your wedding dress because I'm going to go to the same place and i'm going to find one that's also lace like that because that was the most gorgeous dress i've ever seen.


[User] I got it from beholden.

[Assistant] Really, okay. Can we go there, like, do you know how to.


[User] Yeah of course we can. I'm gonna make you an appointment tonight.

[Assistant] Oh my gosh, I love you. I love you so much. This is why I asked you to be my maid of honor. Yep.


[User] And for the record, I love you too, and I promise you, your sisters are gonna feel like maid of honor. Um because I know that they get a little bit weird about things, so i'm gonna make sure that they feel like they're already the maid of honor anyway. Each of them are gonna feel so special. You will have no stress, nothing is gonna be on your shoulders, I promise.

[Assistant] So thoughtful and so kind to everybody, and I so appreciate it, and that's why I asked you. You're already coming in hot, like you're doing a great job as the maid of honor, so.


[User] Wow. Like live music, live string quartet, oh my gosh,

[Assistant] And then greg proposed,


[User] And then greg proposed,

[Assistant] Um ah my gosh, greg proposed, claire, oh my gosh, I can't, that's amazing, i'm so happy for you, oh my gosh, that's so exciting,


[User] Um ah my gosh, greg proposed, claire, oh my gosh, I can't, that's amazing, i'm so happy for you, oh my gosh, that's so exciting,

[Assistant] You so much. I'm going to send you a picture of the ring right now. It's it's it's black, um you know, like the black ah gold that they're doing nowadays. And like and he knew exactly what I wanted. It's black gold, and it's got some rubies on the outside. And then it's got like a beautiful, like, opal in the middle.


[User] You so much. I'm going to send you a picture of the ring right now. It's it's it's black, um you know, like the black ah gold that they're doing nowadays. And like and he knew exactly what I wanted. It's black gold, and it's got some rubies on the outside. And then it's got like a beautiful, like, opal in the middle.

[Assistant] Um gosh, that sounds exactly like you. That sounds exactly like what you would love. He knows you so well.


[User] Um gosh, that sounds exactly like you. That sounds exactly like what you would love. He knows you so well.

[Assistant] It's so perfect and when we got like when the song stopped and everything stopped like they had somebody was recording it off on the island for us so that I have it on video and I could send it to my grandma and I could send it to my grandpa so that they could see it and I could send it back to my family and everybody and so i'm going to send that to you as well and then when we got


[User] It's so perfect and when we got like when the song stopped and everything stopped like they had somebody was recording it off on the island for us so that I have it on video and I could send it to my grandma and I could send it to my grandpa so that they could see it and I could send it back to my family and everybody and so i'm going to send that to you as well and then when we got

[Assistant] You, I wanted to ask.


[User] That sounds amazing. Oh, you're gonna have to make me a tartine when you come back, because that sounds so good. If you know how to make a good one, then I'm gonna make you make me one. Uh, that's so thoughtful. He knew, it sounds like he like just tailored it exactly to you. Like, everything was perfect. Like, he knew that you would love to work with a chef. He knew you would love to be on the water. He knew you would love to stay in Tahoe overnight. Craig is a good one. You got a good one.

[Assistant] And can I tell you that i've already started planning places, so like we're either going to do it here in tahoe or we're going to go back to carmel by the sea, but here's the thing um we're going to do this and we're going to have my family fly out and i'm going to have like just a few people there, but I was wondering if you would


[User] My gosh, really,

[Assistant] No, I don't want you to officiate. I want you to be my maid of honor.


[User] No, I don't want you to officiate. I want you to be my maid of honor.

[Assistant] So really I mean, i'm up for either. Like, i'll do whatever you want. I was excited. I was like, i'm going to become a minister. I was ready. I was going to go online. I was going to join the baptist church. I was going to do it all. But I I would love to be a bridesmaid. I would love to be a maid of honor. Thank you.


[User] So really I mean, i'm up for either. Like, i'll do whatever you want. I was excited. I was like, i'm going to become a minister. I was ready. I was going to go online. I was going to join the baptist church. I was going to do it all. But I I would love to be a bridesmaid. I would love to be a maid of honor. Thank you.

[Assistant] No, be my maid of honor, please be my maid of honor.


[User] No, be my maid of honor, please be my maid of honor.

[Assistant] My gosh, of course, I would love nothing more. Where do you want your bachelorette party, i'm already planning it.


[User] My gosh, of course, I would love nothing more. Where do you want your bachelorette party, i'm already planning it.

[Assistant] You pick wherever i trust you, implicitly anything that you do is going to be perfect.


[User] You pick wherever i trust you, implicitly anything that you do is going to be perfect.

[Assistant] It's going to be vegas if you let me pick. I'm going to pick vegas so oh, that's amazing. Well well um I can't wait. I'm so happy for you. Thank you for asking me.


[User] You did not send me a wine basket,

[Assistant] I did,


[User] I did,

[Assistant] Always send wine baskets. That's so nice of you. I love you. You're the best friend i've ever had.


[User] Um god, robin, tell me.

[Assistant] The catholic


[User] The catholic

[Assistant] Ah stop it, liz. We're good already,


[User] Ah stop it, liz. We're good already,

[Assistant] The cast list is up, ah ah it's already up, it's already up, it's already up, mr. Johnson already put it up, yep.


[User] The cast list is up, ah ah it's already up, it's already up, it's already up, mr. Johnson already put it up, yep.

[Assistant] Um ah god okay ready ready we're gonna look together three two one look oh my god you got cast as ariel,


[User] Um ah god okay ready ready we're gonna look together three two one look oh my god you got cast as ariel,

[Assistant] Dear ursula,


[User] Dear ursula,

[Assistant] Oh my god,


[User] Oh my god,

[Assistant] Oh, you get to be the villain. I'm so excited. I get to be ariel.


[User] Oh, you get to be the villain. I'm so excited. I get to be ariel.

[Assistant] I love it oh my god, you get to be a part of the world, girl,


[User] I love it oh my god, you get to be a part of the world, girl,

[Assistant] Oh, I get to have that solo. I've always wanted to sing that song in front of everybody. Oh, my gosh. I can't wait.


[User] Oh, I get to have that solo. I've always wanted to sing that song in front of everybody. Oh, my gosh. I can't wait.

[Assistant] And you get to go from where oh, my god, you get to wear a mermaid outfit.


[User] Better put you on roller skates.

[Assistant] I can't wait. I've always wanted to be on roller skates on stage.


[User] And you get to have long, beautiful, flowing hair.

[Assistant] Oh oh and you get to have tentacles, you get to have the crazy costume, oh,


[User] Oh oh and you get to have tentacles, you get to have the crazy costume, oh,

[Assistant] And I get to have those really vibrant red red lips. And I oh, and and the the two of us can rehearse together because we get to be opposite so we can play off of each other. We can be like, I'm so upset with you today, but we're not really upset with each other.


[User] And I get to have those really vibrant red red lips. And I oh, and and the the two of us can rehearse together because we get to be opposite so we can play off of each other. We can be like, I'm so upset with you today, but we're not really upset with each other.

[Assistant] Yeah you could come over every friday and we could hang out until like we could have sleepovers and we could do the whole thing and we could make it we could say it's rehearsal and mom or moms will have to let us do it.


[User] And we can work on the outfits together so we can help like design them together.

[Assistant] Oh, yeah, yeah, and I can't wait because my mom has a sewing machine and she just got a new one and it's like, it's so fancy and I've been wanting to try it out, but I've not had an excuse. So now I get to make my own little tail.


[User] Oh, yeah, yeah, and I can't wait because my mom has a sewing machine and she just got a new one and it's like, it's so fancy and I've been wanting to try it out, but I've not had an excuse. So now I get to make my own little tail.

[Assistant] I'm so excited for that. Oh, and I found this um I found this material that's like iridescent so that like an opalescent so like it's shiny and it like shows all of that and we could use it for the scales and then like,


[User] You've already thought ahead.

[Assistant] Yeah and then we can maybe find something like, you know, like a cool like texture or whatever to make it look like the octopus tentacles and stuff oh my god, that would be so cool,


[User] Yeah and then we can maybe find something like, you know, like a cool like texture or whatever to make it look like the octopus tentacles and stuff oh my god, that would be so cool,

[Assistant] I would love that we could put suction cups on it, like take plungers and and make that the little suction cups for your tentacles. That would be really fun.


[User] I would love that we could put suction cups on it, like take plungers and and make that the little suction cups for your tentacles. That would be really fun.

[Assistant] Maybe we could use, like, a longboard or some kind of, like, skateboard or something underneath me so that, like, I can roll across,


[User] Maybe we could use, like, a longboard or some kind of, like, skateboard or something underneath me so that, like, I can roll across,

[Assistant] Oh yeah, we could have your little fish minions push you across the stage. That would be so fun. It looks like alec and jackson got cast as the fish minions. They're gonna be so funny.


[User] Oh yeah, we could have your little fish minions push you across the stage. That would be so fun. It looks like alec and jackson got cast as the fish minions. They're gonna be so funny.

[Assistant] Of course they did oh oh my gosh look at spencer sebastian how fitting is that,


[User] Of course they did oh oh my gosh look at spencer sebastian how fitting is that,

[Assistant] Oh, that's going to be so perfect. I can't wait to hear him sing under the sea. He's going to do such a good job with all the little I can just picture him now with the little clam shells in his hands making the little sounds.


[User] Oh, that's going to be so perfect. I can't wait to hear him sing under the sea. He's going to do such a good job with all the little I can just picture him now with the little clam shells in his hands making the little sounds.

[Assistant] Oh, my god, chris got cast as the chef he's gonna be so funny as the chef. He's so funny every time he's in a play and oh, my gosh, look at it dorian's gonna be the he's gonna be flounder you get to play with dorian. Oh, my god, you get to be so close to dorian. Are you kidding me, you're gonna be so close to dorian.


[User] Oh, my god, chris got cast as the chef he's gonna be so funny as the chef. He's so funny every time he's in a play and oh, my gosh, look at it dorian's gonna be the he's gonna be flounder you get to play with dorian. Oh, my god, you get to be so close to dorian. Are you kidding me, you're gonna be so close to dorian.

[Assistant] Yeah, but I was really hoping Dorian would get cast as Eric, but I feel like you're making a really good point right now because if Dorian is flounder, then that means we get to have a lot of extra rehearsals, right? Like, we gotta map out all of those first scenes. That's gonna be a lot to work on, and that means I get to like, I don't know, we get to have him over at my house maybe, and we could, uh, it's an in.


[User] Yeah, but I was really hoping Dorian would get cast as Eric, but I feel like you're making a really good point right now because if Dorian is flounder, then that means we get to have a lot of extra rehearsals, right? Like, we gotta map out all of those first scenes. That's gonna be a lot to work on, and that means I get to like, I don't know, we get to have him over at my house maybe, and we could, uh, it's an in.

[Assistant] And look it looks like um it looks like brazen is playing eric so like it's not like you're going to be without because he's so gorgeous.


[User] And look it looks like um it looks like brazen is playing eric so like it's not like you're going to be without because he's so gorgeous.

[Assistant] Ah okay I get two love interests, this is crazy, well,


[User] Ah okay I get two love interests, this is crazy, well,

[Assistant] Um like and because I know that, like, you've been kind of talking to him inside, like, science class and everything, so maybe you guys can, like, talk a little bit more.


[User] Um like and because I know that, like, you've been kind of talking to him inside, like, science class and everything, so maybe you guys can, like, talk a little bit more.

[Assistant] No, I kind of have a crush on both of them. Is that bad,


[User] I mean, you get to choose. Maybe i'll see you oh my god this is gonna prove to you which one you have more chemistry with.

[Assistant] Oh my gosh, you're so right. I can't wait to see, like, if, if I have more chemistry with Eric, because if we, if we're on stage, we have to have, we have to, like, force it, right? We want it to look really good and we want it to look natural, but I feel like I, I don't want anybody to know if I have chemistry with Flounder, right? That's gonna look bad, but oh, I can't wait, I can't wait for rehearsals to start.


[User] Oh my gosh, you're so right. I can't wait to see, like, if, if I have more chemistry with Eric, because if we, if we're on stage, we have to have, we have to, like, force it, right? We want it to look really good and we want it to look natural, but I feel like I, I don't want anybody to know if I have chemistry with Flounder, right? That's gonna look bad, but oh, I can't wait, I can't wait for rehearsals to start.

[Assistant] Um so excited for you and i'm so excited that we get to play opposite to each other and we're gonna figure this all out and we're gonna


[User] Um so excited for you and i'm so excited that we get to play opposite to each other and we're gonna figure this all out and we're gonna

[Assistant] I know, you're gonna be the best villain. I can't wait for you to take my voice. Oh.


[User] I know, you're gonna be the best villain. I can't wait for you to take my voice. Oh.

[Assistant] Um my god, yeah, it's gonna be so fun. Oh my god, and I just can't wait for um I can't wait for spencer to get chased around by by the chef. It's gonna be so stupid.


[User] Um my god, yeah, it's gonna be so fun. Oh my god, and I just can't wait for um I can't wait for spencer to get chased around by by the chef. It's gonna be so stupid.

[Assistant] Yeah, oh, it's gonna be so silly with I wonder how they're gonna do the knives part. Like they'll have to do something stagewise. I've never done it with the the stage knives before.


[User] Yeah, oh, it's gonna be so silly with I wonder how they're gonna do the knives part. Like they'll have to do something stagewise. I've never done it with the the stage knives before.

[Assistant] Do you think they're going to use those big um the lights that they have that like maybe come down and with the sound effect like a chopping sound effect that would be so cool like that what they did,


[User] Do you think they're going to use those big um the lights that they have that like maybe come down and with the sound effect like a chopping sound effect that would be so cool like that what they did,

[Assistant] Ah that would be so cool I wonder who's who's lighting designing it is it is april like it was last year oh she's so good with lights oh I every single play every single play she does i'm like how did they do that that doesn't seem like a high school lighting that does not seem


[User] We have to get in touch with her because she's obviously a part of our crew, so she's going to be so excited.

[Assistant] Um too. She's just so talented. We've got like a really good group for this one. I feel like we're going to be we're going to


[User] Senior year is going to crush it.

[Assistant] Yeah, I can't wait for rehearsals to start. Do they start Monday? Oh my gosh, okay, okay, I gotta get, gotta tell the basketball team.


[User] Um gosh, sarah, it's ringing it's ringing,

[Assistant] The answer, oh, my god, the answer.


[User] The answer, oh, my god, the answer.

[Assistant] They answered, they answered, they answered. We just won, we just won the six month cruise.


[User] They answered, they answered, they answered. We just won, we just won the six month cruise.

[Assistant] Are. You. Kidding. Me,


[User] Are. You. Kidding. Me,

[Assistant] I am not kidding you we are going


[User] I am not kidding you we are going

[Assistant] God, i'm so excited because we don't have anything to do from now until college starting.


[User] God, i'm so excited because we don't have anything to do from now until college starting.

[Assistant] Oh, my gosh, this is the most perfect timing. Like, who else could have won a six-month cruise and just, like, done it, this is amazing,


[User] Oh, my gosh, this is the most perfect timing. Like, who else could have won a six-month cruise and just, like, done it, this is amazing,

[Assistant] I cannot wait because we're going to stop in st. Lucia we're going to stop down in st. Maarten we're going to stop in barbados.


[User] I cannot wait because we're going to stop in st. Lucia we're going to stop down in st. Maarten we're going to stop in barbados.

[Assistant] Hope we stop in aruba. I want to stop in aruba.


[User] Hope we stop in aruba. I want to stop in aruba.

[Assistant] I think it stops in aruba. Oh my god, we're gonna have we're gonna have waffles because, ah like, yeah the dutch island, it's gonna we're gonna have and st. Martinique and everything, we're gonna have all of these we're gonna have so much dutch food, we're gonna have waffles, we're gonna have breakfast every single day and we're gonna lay in hammocks when we're on off of the boat.


[User] I think it stops in aruba. Oh my god, we're gonna have we're gonna have waffles because, ah like, yeah the dutch island, it's gonna we're gonna have and st. Martinique and everything, we're gonna have all of these we're gonna have so much dutch food, we're gonna have waffles, we're gonna have breakfast every single day and we're gonna lay in hammocks when we're on off of the boat.

[Assistant] My gosh, can we go to cuba and get some cuban cigars and everything, I don't even smoke cigars, but I want to go to cuba.


[User] My gosh, can we go to cuba and get some cuban cigars and everything, I don't even smoke cigars, but I want to go to cuba.

[Assistant] We're going to stop in havana. Of course we're going to stop in havana.


[User] We're going to stop in havana. Of course we're going to stop in havana.

[Assistant] Oh my gosh, havana is so beautiful. Oh, I can't believe


[User] Oh, my goodness,

[Assistant] And we're gonna go swimming in the and we're gonna go swimming in the mediterranean.


[User] And we're gonna go swimming in the and we're gonna go swimming in the mediterranean.

[Assistant] Yeah, do you see how many European stops there are? There's like 12 different places we get to go. Oh, I can't wait to go to, oh, is it, wow, we can go to, we can go to all of the different parts of the island and the UK. There's so many different ports. They're going to let us pick. They let us pick.


[User] Yeah, do you see how many European stops there are? There's like 12 different places we get to go. Oh, I can't wait to go to, oh, is it, wow, we can go to, we can go to all of the different parts of the island and the UK. There's so many different ports. They're going to let us pick. They let us pick.

[Assistant] Oh, oh my god, this is incredible because we can tailor make it to anywhere that we want to go. Oh my god, we can go to new zealand, we can go to australia, we can go to japan if we wanted to go to japan.


[User] Oh, oh my god, this is incredible because we can tailor make it to anywhere that we want to go. Oh my god, we can go to new zealand, we can go to australia, we can go to japan if we wanted to go to japan.

[Assistant] Oh my gosh, oh my gosh,


[User] Oh my gosh, oh my gosh,

[Assistant] We can go north if we wanted to go into the northern parts and we wanted to go into the red sea if we wanted to go into the dead sea we can go any of these places we can go into the black sea oh my god,


[User] We can go north if we wanted to go into the northern parts and we wanted to go into the red sea if we wanted to go into the dead sea we can go any of these places we can go into the black sea oh my god,

[Assistant] I pulled up the website. Do you see the suite that we're in? Do you see this room?


[User] Oh, my god, that's huge we have different rooms inside one suite.

[Assistant] Have a clawfoot bathtub on a ship, is that even a possibility, wow,


[User] My god, and they're individual hammocks if we wanted to go and lay out somewhere.

[Assistant] Oh my gosh, this looks amazing. Open bar the whole time, all amenities included. What,


[User] We get our own pool.

[Assistant] We don't have to pay for food for the next six months even,


[User] We don't have to pay for food for the next six months even,

[Assistant] Um my god, it's going to be incredible. And they have a vegan option if they wanted to, like, every single day.


[User] My gosh oh my gosh that's perfect for you.

[Assistant] Look at this, they have cooking classes if we wanted to do like any kind of cooking and so and learn how to do any of that ourselves.


[User] Look at this, they have cooking classes if we wanted to do like any kind of cooking and so and learn how to do any of that ourselves.

[Assistant] I'm definitely taking yeah, the dutch classes, of course. You can make waffles. I want to make a waffle.


[User] My gosh, we have to do it,

[Assistant] Yeah, oh, I can't wait, ah, I, ah, man,


[User] Oh, my god, your favorite band is going to be performing while were on the ship.

[Assistant] No, you are not serious! Backstreet Boys is doing a reunion tour on a cruise.


[User] Backstreet boys is doing the reunion on the cruise with spice girls.

[Assistant] Oh no this is my dream come true,


[User] Oh no this is my dream come true,

[Assistant] I am so stoked.


[User] I am so stoked.

[Assistant] I didn't know that it was gonna be a reunion of ninety s bands. But it is. And this is like this is my childhood dream. This is my childhood dream.


[User] I didn't know that it was gonna be a reunion of ninety s bands. But it is. And this is like this is my childhood dream. This is my childhood dream.

[Assistant] It's our childhood dream. I cannot but I cannot believe this. This is going to be insane.


[User] I don't know. I I i'm probably just going to get everything.

[Assistant] I'm going to do lobster every day. Every day i'm going to have a lobster. I'm going to have a different one. I'm going to have what,


[User] They have the s'mores, twenty fifteen, circa.

[Assistant] Oh my gosh they tailored this cruise to me. They knew holy cow I think I might have a heart attack. I think I might not be okay.


[User] And the thirtieth anniversary you're gonna have cheesecake every day and you're gonna be so skinny because I don't know how you do it but you pack it away and it never goes anywhere.

[Assistant] I don't know if I have cheesecake every day. I think it's gonna be a problem. It's gonna be.


[User] I don't know if I have cheesecake every day. I think it's gonna be a problem. It's gonna be.

[Assistant] No, you have to. You're gonna have you're gonna have six months of cheesecake. I'm so excited for you.


[User] No, you have to. You're gonna have you're gonna have six months of cheesecake. I'm so excited for you.

[Assistant] I can't wait. I can't wait. Oh, they have vegan cheesecake, too. Do you see this, there's a whole vegan menu.


[User] I can't wait. I can't wait. Oh, they have vegan cheesecake, too. Do you see this, there's a whole vegan menu.

[Assistant] Oh my god, they're doing they have a cheesecake factory vegan menu options.


[User] I didn't even know the cheesecake factory did vegan cheesecakes,

[Assistant] That's insane. I I get to try everything that you've tried and told me about for years now. I'm so excited.


[User] That's insane. I I get to try everything that you've tried and told me about for years now. I'm so excited.

[Assistant] We're going to get a nice big slice of cheesecake. We're going to settle right in the front row of the backstreet boys. We're going to watch the spice girls open for them. And then we're going to have a party.


[User] We're going to get a nice big slice of cheesecake. We're going to settle right in the front row of the backstreet boys. We're going to watch the spice girls open for them. And then we're going to have a party.

[Assistant] And then we're going to go back to the personal pool with all of this food and just chill out in the water and just totally cheers out to this. I'm so excited.


[User] And then we're going to go back to the personal pool with all of this food and just chill out in the water and just totally cheers out to this. I'm so excited.

[Assistant] This is amazing. I've never won anything in my life. And I won a final. This is a big prize.


[User] And we're it looks like we're leaving from new york, so I say the first thing we do massive slice of new york pizza to start off the trip.

[Assistant] Oh my gosh, you speak my language. Oh boy.


[User] Oh my god in the assembly when his hair started falling off the toupee went to the left side of his head and it was just like how did you not feel it it was hanging off of your head on your ear

[Assistant] It almost seemed like he was completely unaware, but everybody was stifling their laughter.


[User] It almost seemed like he was completely unaware, but everybody was stifling their laughter.

[Assistant] It's it and his head when it began sweating under the lights after like twenty minutes of being up on the podium I don't know how he wasn't able to feel it


[User] It's it and his head when it began sweating under the lights after like twenty minutes of being up on the podium I don't know how he wasn't able to feel it

[Assistant] You think he noticed when he went up to scratch it,


[User] You think he noticed when he went up to scratch it,

[Assistant] I don't know it's funny because at one point I thought he was trying to adjust it and you know by like scratching near his left ear and like reaching back and and all he did was knock it down further onto his shoulder.


[User] I don't know it's funny because at one point I thought he was trying to adjust it and you know by like scratching near his left ear and like reaching back and and all he did was knock it down further onto his shoulder.

[Assistant] I wonder if he even noticed when he got home his wife maybe didn't even tell him.


[User] I wonder if he even noticed when he got home his wife maybe didn't even tell him.

[Assistant] Um like it looks like you were saying that it was like from like a dollar store off of like one of the most main like streets that you would see downtown somewhere. It's ridiculous.


[User] Um like it looks like you were saying that it was like from like a dollar store off of like one of the most main like streets that you would see downtown somewhere. It's ridiculous.

[Assistant] Yeah, theres no way he spent more than like five dollars on that thing.


[User] Yeah, theres no way he spent more than like five dollars on that thing.

[Assistant] Um I mean, ah he was going to sweat regardless, but I feel like the the acrylic from that thing would have made him sweat more oh, my god do you think his cat has stolen it in the past,


[User] Um I mean, ah he was going to sweat regardless, but I feel like the the acrylic from that thing would have made him sweat more oh, my god do you think his cat has stolen it in the past,

[Assistant] I bet that cat has dragged it around their entire house it looks like a cat had taken its claws to it.


[User] I bet that cat has dragged it around their entire house it looks like a cat had taken its claws to it.

[Assistant] Right, and and no offense, but he's so cheap, so it wouldn't surprise me if he's had it for years.


[User] Right, and and no offense, but he's so cheap, so it wouldn't surprise me if he's had it for years.

[Assistant] Yeah oh man, it was certain to give out today or at some point.


[User] Yeah oh man, it was certain to give out today or at some point.

[Assistant] Oh, my gosh oh, and it didn't help that when he went to get off the stage, the little jimmy from from kindergarten class chased him down screaming about his pet that fell off his shoulder.


[User] Oh, my gosh oh, and it didn't help that when he went to get off the stage, the little jimmy from from kindergarten class chased him down screaming about his pet that fell off his shoulder.

[Assistant] He probably was so embarrassed. I feel kind of bad for laughing about it, but he should have used some toupee glue.


[User] He probably was so embarrassed. I feel kind of bad for laughing about it, but he should have used some toupee glue.

[Assistant] Yeah I mean I feel bad but sometimes I don't because that coupled with an all-wool suit all year round I don't know how he does it he's always sweating


[User] Yeah I mean I feel bad but sometimes I don't because that coupled with an all-wool suit all year round I don't know how he does it he's always sweating

[Assistant] Yeah you're bound to be sweaty when you dress like that. He's so weird.


[User] Yeah you're bound to be sweaty when you dress like that. He's so weird.

[Assistant] And have you ever watched him in the in the teachers lounge, he eats soup for lunch and a full suit with that toupee on his head. How does he do that,


[User] And have you ever watched him in the in the teachers lounge, he eats soup for lunch and a full suit with that toupee on his head. How does he do that,

[Assistant] Even during summer school,


[User] Even during summer school,

[Assistant] Always, always, he has a thermos full of soup.


[User] Always, always, he has a thermos full of soup.

[Assistant] Wow. I didn't know you could like soup that much.


[User] Wow. I didn't know you could like soup that much.

[Assistant] Oh, my gosh. If he was gonna be a spokesperson for anything, it would be campbell's.


[User] Oh my god sophie when that guy came out in a thong in the middle of the room smoking and then put the cigarette in his thong for you to start smoking out of I can't believe you did it.

[Assistant] I had a couple of drinks, otherwise I probably wouldn't have gone that that close to a strange man.


[User] I had a couple of drinks, otherwise I probably wouldn't have gone that that close to a strange man.

[Assistant] It's incredible to watch you sometimes when you drink. It's just so fun to see you let loose.


[User] It's incredible to watch you sometimes when you drink. It's just so fun to see you let loose.

[Assistant] Yeah and you had a few drinks too.


[User] Yeah and you had a few drinks too.

[Assistant] Oh, I know it was something I don't do often, but I had to keep up with you.


[User] Oh, I know it was something I don't do often, but I had to keep up with you.

[Assistant] Yeah and you you gambled a lot of money.


[User] Yeah and you you gambled a lot of money.

[Assistant] Oh my god, I can't believe that I lost five thousand dollars.


[User] Oh my god, I can't believe that I lost five thousand dollars.

[Assistant] I can't believe you lost it and then won it back and then lost it again.


[User] I can't believe you lost it and then won it back and then lost it again.

[Assistant] But then I found that voucher for ten thousand dollars so it like evened itself out.


[User] But then I found that voucher for ten thousand dollars so it like evened itself out.

[Assistant] That's absolutely ridiculous. You are the luckiest person I know.


[User] That's absolutely ridiculous. You are the luckiest person I know.

[Assistant] Thankfully, I found it when I was hungover, so I didn't make any poor decisions with it. But oh, I will tell you that egg dish from the casino. I was so sick. It was so gross.


[User] Thankfully, I found it when I was hungover, so I didn't make any poor decisions with it. But oh, I will tell you that egg dish from the casino. I was so sick. It was so gross.

[Assistant] No, I didn't know you were so sick from it. You were you hid it so well. In the bathroom you were a champ. Yeah I thought you were just hungover.


[User] No, I didn't know you were so sick from it. You were you hid it so well. In the bathroom you were a champ. Yeah I thought you were just hungover.

[Assistant] Oh, absolutely not. I was puking up that egg. It was so gross.


[User] Oh, absolutely not. I was puking up that egg. It was so gross.

[Assistant] That's so funny.


[User] That's so funny.

[Assistant] Ah but you on the other hand you kept all of that liquor in your stomach and you still managed you made me feel so gross the next day because you pounded back that that veal parm and I don't know how you did it


[User] Ah but you on the other hand you kept all of that liquor in your stomach and you still managed you made me feel so gross the next day because you pounded back that that veal parm and I don't know how you did it

[Assistant] I have a stomach of steel. Yeah oh but it was pretty fun to watch you with ah all the the servers in the thongs. I know they came to me and I took the the cigarette but they were all certainly flirting with you.


[User] I have a stomach of steel. Yeah oh but it was pretty fun to watch you with ah all the the servers in the thongs. I know they came to me and I took the the cigarette but they were all certainly flirting with you.

[Assistant] So well, um I saw that picture that you took of me where i'm looking at him and i'm cringing because he's sweaty and he has my hand on his stomach and I feel so gross. And you can see it in my face, but I just also just don't even remember it, to be honest.


[User] So well, um I saw that picture that you took of me where i'm looking at him and i'm cringing because he's sweaty and he has my hand on his stomach and I feel so gross. And you can see it in my face, but I just also just don't even remember it, to be honest.

[Assistant] You kept inviting them to the chapels.


[User] You were like, i'm gonna get married in vegas.

[Assistant] Thankfully they didn't take me up on the offer.


[User] I wouldn t have blamed you.

[Assistant] Oh, oh my god, but remember in the taxi when I lost my cell phone and left it there and you were like we were frantically calling it and calling it and calling it and the guy who was just like this disgruntled old man who like drove up to the mirage and handed it to you so that you'd stop calling it because you called it every two seconds and I left the sound on and it was just it was highway to hell by ac dc and the ring just going off he was so furious.


[User] Oh, oh my god, but remember in the taxi when I lost my cell phone and left it there and you were like we were frantically calling it and calling it and calling it and the guy who was just like this disgruntled old man who like drove up to the mirage and handed it to you so that you'd stop calling it because you called it every two seconds and I left the sound on and it was just it was highway to hell by ac dc and the ring just going off he was so furious.

[Assistant] Yeah, he told me to not ever take a cab again in the town yeah ah


[User] Yeah, he told me to not ever take a cab again in the town yeah ah

[Assistant] Man and when we went to the gas station though when we stopped there and you insisted that you were gonna go in and gamble and you went in and you came out and and you had like randomly gotten like twenty dollars out of this machine that you found in there and then the guy came out chasing after you telling you that you still had to pay for the drinks and stuff you just like walked out you completely left everything


[User] Man and when we went to the gas station though when we stopped there and you insisted that you were gonna go in and gamble and you went in and you came out and and you had like randomly gotten like twenty dollars out of this machine that you found in there and then the guy came out chasing after you telling you that you still had to pay for the drinks and stuff you just like walked out you completely left everything

[Assistant] I just got so excited. What did he say to you,


[User] I just got so excited. What did he say to you,

[Assistant] Just screaming, get back here, get back here.


[User] Just screaming, get back here, get back here.

[Assistant] No,


[User] No,

[Assistant] Don't leave, you have to pay for all of that. You're accountable for her. And I was like, i'm sorry, i'm sorry.


[User] Don't leave, you have to pay for all of that. You're accountable for her. And I was like, i'm sorry, i'm sorry.

[Assistant] When we got back to the hotel and you went to the bar at the hotel lobby and you talked to the bartender there, do you remember what you were saying to him,


[User] When we got back to the hotel and you went to the bar at the hotel lobby and you talked to the bartender there, do you remember what you were saying to him,

[Assistant] I if it's anything like all of the servers that were half-naked, it's probably that I was going to marry him.


[User] I if it's anything like all of the servers that were half-naked, it's probably that I was going to marry him.

[Assistant] He you invited him to the elvis impersonator chapel.


[User] He you invited him to the elvis impersonator chapel.

[Assistant] My god.


[User] My god.

[Assistant] You're wild.


[User] You're wild.

[Assistant] My god, that reminds me and I kept doing elvis impersonations of like heartbreak hotel and telling him they had


[User] My god, that reminds me and I kept doing elvis impersonations of like heartbreak hotel and telling him they had

[Assistant] Your impression wasn't very good.


[User] Your impression wasn't very good.

[Assistant] Um not surprised. Oh my god, ugh. I don't know I don't know what we're gonna do next, but I know that whatever it is, it's gonna be reckless.


[User] Um not surprised. Oh my god, ugh. I don't know I don't know what we're gonna do next, but I know that whatever it is, it's gonna be reckless.

[Assistant] Yeah.


[User] I totally remember that. I had never seen dad so mad, but I had also never laughed so hard. He just whipped around from the urinal. How old were we?

[Assistant] Oh my god. Oh, we were about like ten and I can't believe it. Like we just like ran through not expecting it. Both of us went whoop. Dad's just like furious, just like flipping out, turning around, obviously like dropped some pee on the ground as he's turning.


[User] Oh my god. Oh, we were about like ten and I can't believe it. Like we just like ran through not expecting it. Both of us went whoop. Dad's just like furious, just like flipping out, turning around, obviously like dropped some pee on the ground as he's turning.

[Assistant] Did he get it all over his pants, I remember mom being mad that she had to do the laundry that night.


[User] Did he get it all over his pants, I remember mom being mad that she had to do the laundry that night.

[Assistant] Yeah and he's like trying to look professional because he's like oh look how successful i've been in my life going back to my elementary school to like reminisce and now he looks like he's got like pee that he's brought into the classrooms and stuff with him.


[User] Yeah and he's like trying to look professional because he's like oh look how successful i've been in my life going back to my elementary school to like reminisce and now he looks like he's got like pee that he's brought into the classrooms and stuff with him.

[Assistant] It's never not funny when people get pee on themselves.


[User] It's never not funny when people get pee on themselves.

[Assistant] Oh man, i'll never forget it. Ah it reminds me of do you remember when we used to live in the ground floor apartment and we shared that place when we were going through college and the ice cream truck used to go by like religiously, do you remember, and it always played that song, the turkey in the straw song,


[User] Oh man, i'll never forget it. Ah it reminds me of do you remember when we used to live in the ground floor apartment and we shared that place when we were going through college and the ice cream truck used to go by like religiously, do you remember, and it always played that song, the turkey in the straw song,

[Assistant] Yes, I remember that.


[User] Yes, I remember that.

[Assistant] Yeah and so I just like I didn't know what to do so like we would walk down the street it didn't matter if it was like because there were a ton of people out all the time and I would do that dance that upset you so much like you do you remember like I would always dance and like really take my time and dance to it like it was like this old timey vaudeville show do you remember,


[User] Yeah and so I just like I didn't know what to do so like we would walk down the street it didn't matter if it was like because there were a ton of people out all the time and I would do that dance that upset you so much like you do you remember like I would always dance and like really take my time and dance to it like it was like this old timey vaudeville show do you remember,

[Assistant] Yeah you would always end it with a little turkey dance, too. You'd tack it on at the very end.


[User] Yeah you would always end it with a little turkey dance, too. You'd tack it on at the very end.

[Assistant] Yeah and I would like delay like opening the door. I would like unlock it and then lock it again and then open it again and then lock it again. And you would just like be furious at me. It would take like twenty minutes to get into the apartment.


[User] Yeah and I would like delay like opening the door. I would like unlock it and then lock it again and then open it again and then lock it again. And you would just like be furious at me. It would take like twenty minutes to get into the apartment.

[Assistant] Yeah do you remember the time he gave you free ice cream because of it,


[User] Yeah do you remember the time he gave you free ice cream because of it,

[Assistant] Yeah I just danced in front of the truck and then he gave us free ice cream and said free soft serve anytime from now on.


[User] Yeah I just danced in front of the truck and then he gave us free ice cream and said free soft serve anytime from now on.

[Assistant] I wish we'd taken up on it taken him up on it more.


[User] I wish we'd taken up on it taken him up on it more.

[Assistant] Oh, man, I know. Oh, but it's so embarrassing because you played it that video at like at the family reunion and everybody saw and we saw this turkey in the straw dance and then like from now on it's been like a thing I need to do every year.


[User] Oh, man, I know. Oh, but it's so embarrassing because you played it that video at like at the family reunion and everybody saw and we saw this turkey in the straw dance and then like from now on it's been like a thing I need to do every year.

[Assistant] Yeah, it's so fun to watch you have to everybody makes you get up in front of the whole family it's great I love it


[User] Yeah, it's so fun to watch you have to everybody makes you get up in front of the whole family it's great I love it

[Assistant] My god, it's so ridiculous, but it does it parallel to like getting you up every year and like making me you like recount the pledge of allegiance that you tried to do. Do you remember when you tried to do the pledge of allegiance and you had gotten your wisdom teeth out,


[User] My god, it's so ridiculous, but it does it parallel to like getting you up every year and like making me you like recount the pledge of allegiance that you tried to do. Do you remember when you tried to do the pledge of allegiance and you had gotten your wisdom teeth out,

[Assistant] Yes and I couldn't remember any of the words so I just replaced them with like our family's names.


[User] Yes and I couldn't remember any of the words so I just replaced them with like our family's names.

[Assistant] And it was like ten full minutes of you just going off and crying and like saluting the flag for like ten minutes, but you weren't even talking about the pledge of allegiance.


[User] And it was like ten full minutes of you just going off and crying and like saluting the flag for like ten minutes, but you weren't even talking about the pledge of allegiance.

[Assistant] Yeah at one point I think I just started listing canadians.


[User] Yeah at one point I think I just started listing canadians.

[Assistant] Oh my god, you're too much. I'm so glad we don't live together anymore though.


[User] I can't believe that kevin's class did macbeth like at their age, seven years old, you're doing macbeth, are you kidding,

[Assistant] Yeah it was like the the best worst rendition i've ever seen lady macbeth, her outfit,


[User] Yeah it was like the the best worst rendition i've ever seen lady macbeth, her outfit,

[Assistant] And the teacher, like Mrs. Mrs. Proxy, like running out after the kids chasing out because they're half dressed and they're like they're yelling their lines. They don't even know half of what they're saying. They're just screaming and singing like that kid that was in the corner the entire play just singing and like playing with the like the the set.


[User] And the teacher, like Mrs. Mrs. Proxy, like running out after the kids chasing out because they're half dressed and they're like they're yelling their lines. They don't even know half of what they're saying. They're just screaming and singing like that kid that was in the corner the entire play just singing and like playing with the like the the set.

[Assistant] Yeah, he he seemed like he wouldn't even know where he was and then the other kid that was so afraid of the fake dagger.


[User] Yeah, he he seemed like he wouldn't even know where he was and then the other kid that was so afraid of the fake dagger.

[Assistant] Oh, my god. He just broke down crying. His parents had to come out on stage and get him. Oh, my gosh. I'm surprised they chose Macbeth. It was so cute, though, watching them do the three witches. It was adorable. But they were, like, like, trying to mix everything and all the potions and everything. And, like, just everything, like, water all over the stage. And the kids that were, like, slipping all over.


[User] Oh, my god. He just broke down crying. His parents had to come out on stage and get him. Oh, my gosh. I'm surprised they chose Macbeth. It was so cute, though, watching them do the three witches. It was adorable. But they were, like, like, trying to mix everything and all the potions and everything. And, like, just everything, like, water all over the stage. And the kids that were, like, slipping all over.

[Assistant] Yeah they had so much fun putting things into that pot that they didn't notice it was going to bubble over.


[User] Yeah they had so much fun putting things into that pot that they didn't notice it was going to bubble over.

[Assistant] I know. Oh man.


[User] I know. Oh man.

[Assistant] And did did you see the kid playing macduff,


[User] And did did you see the kid playing macduff,

[Assistant] Oh my god not suited and like the hat just coming down over his eyes every time he went to tell


[User] Oh my god not suited and like the hat just coming down over his eyes every time he went to tell

[Assistant] Yeah and then he just really wanted to stand like next to lady macduff the whole time.


[User] Yeah and then he just really wanted to stand like next to lady macduff the whole time.

[Assistant] He kept trying to hold her hand and she kept shooing him away. When she hit him, it was so


[User] He kept trying to hold her hand and she kept shooing him away. When she hit him, it was so

[Assistant] And the kids dressed up as trees who were the ensemble,


[User] And the kids dressed up as trees who were the ensemble,

[Assistant] Like yeah and they were swaying and they like knocked each other over. Like I don't know why they put them in those hard cardboard outfits.


[User] Like yeah and they were swaying and they like knocked each other over. Like I don't know why they put them in those hard cardboard outfits.

[Assistant] Kind of cruel to do that to little seven year olds.


[User] Kind of cruel to do that to little seven year olds.

[Assistant] I love watching Mrs. Proctor though because at the very end of the play you could tell like her hair was disheveled, she was like a mess and she had tears in the corner of her eyes. You could see she was trying not to cry. Like she had been like praying for this to go well the whole year and it was just a disaster.


[User] I love watching Mrs. Proctor though because at the very end of the play you could tell like her hair was disheveled, she was like a mess and she had tears in the corner of her eyes. You could see she was trying not to cry. Like she had been like praying for this to go well the whole year and it was just a disaster.

[Assistant] Yeah I saw her mouthing the words backstage off to the side in the wings especially when kids would forget their lines she'd just whisper


[User] Yeah I saw her mouthing the words backstage off to the side in the wings especially when kids would forget their lines she'd just whisper

[Assistant] But it was like not a stage it was like a stage whisper like you could hear her through the mics on the stage it was insane oh do you remember near the end when like something lit on fire and you could see the smoke off to the right side of the stage and she was just like panicking like you could hear her backstage going no no no no no


[User] But it was like not a stage it was like a stage whisper like you could hear her through the mics on the stage it was insane oh do you remember near the end when like something lit on fire and you could see the smoke off to the right side of the stage and she was just like panicking like you could hear her backstage going no no no no no

[Assistant] Yeah, she didn't let anybody pull the fire alarm because she didn't want to ruin the show.


[User] Yeah, she didn't let anybody pull the fire alarm because she didn't want to ruin the show.

[Assistant] Oh, it was ruined. It was ruined.


[User] Ah jen, I have called you now like five times i'm looking for you. I know that you keep telling me, hey, you know, i'm standing in front of the apple store. I have walked around this entire place and I can't make it to that level.

[Assistant] How can you not make it to the level, there are escalators everywhere,


[User] How can you not make it to the level, there are escalators everywhere,

[Assistant] I don't know I keep getting to an escalator and it just wants to take me up. There's only one level I can only go up one more level. There's nowhere else for me to go.


[User] I don't know I keep getting to an escalator and it just wants to take me up. There's only one level I can only go up one more level. There's nowhere else for me to go.

[Assistant] I think you need to go down a few.


[User] I think you need to go down a few.

[Assistant] Um don't they just have stairs in this place, like aren't there just stairs,


[User] Um don't they just have stairs in this place, like aren't there just stairs,

[Assistant] There's got to be a i'll come to you i'm by the spencers. Where are you,


[User] There's got to be a i'll come to you i'm by the spencers. Where are you,

[Assistant] Um my god. Ok. I see I see spencer's across the way ok. I'm going to go i'm going to go to the right now ok I why is there a wall here, I can't get around like, what is happening here this this is like this is a labyrinth. This is an actual labyrinth.


[User] Um my god. Ok. I see I see spencer's across the way ok. I'm going to go i'm going to go to the right now ok I why is there a wall here, I can't get around like, what is happening here this this is like this is a labyrinth. This is an actual labyrinth.

[Assistant] And you see any exit signs, just follow the exit signs and it'll take you to a stairwell.


[User] And you see any exit signs, just follow the exit signs and it'll take you to a stairwell.

[Assistant] Oh my god. Ok, i'm going to go to the left. Ok, on the left I have an escalator that goes, surprisingly, up. And I can go up once again. So we can go up. Ok ok and I like how do we get there, jen,


[User] Oh my god. Ok, i'm going to go to the left. Ok, on the left I have an escalator that goes, surprisingly, up. And I can go up once again. So we can go up. Ok ok and I like how do we get there, jen,

[Assistant] And ruth, I don't know. Where are you,


[User] And ruth, I don't know. Where are you,

[Assistant] Okay. Do you see a store? It says garden essentials.


[User] Okay. Do you see a store? It says garden essentials.

[Assistant] I see build a bear. I don't see garden essentials.


[User] I see build a bear. I don't see garden essentials.

[Assistant] I don't even know if we're in the same mall at this point. I feel like i've been locked in a prison. This is what hell is.


[User] I don't even know if we're in the same mall at this point. I feel like i've been locked in a prison. This is what hell is.

[Assistant] Are you on the top floor now,


[User] Are you on the top floor now,

[Assistant] I think so oh my god


[User] I think so oh my god

[Assistant] What do you see,


[User] What do you see,

[Assistant] Um garden scent garden essentials michael's is across from it. And um oh, yeah. And then home scents so all the like no no stores that nobody wants to go to in this place. They only come here like old people shop in this part of it.


[User] Um garden scent garden essentials michael's is across from it. And um oh, yeah. And then home scents so all the like no no stores that nobody wants to go to in this place. They only come here like old people shop in this part of it.

[Assistant] Wait a minute, are you in the galleria or are you in burbank,


[User] Wait a minute, are you in the galleria or are you in burbank,

[Assistant] I don't know anymore. I think i'm in burbank, dude.


[User] I don't know anymore. I think i'm in burbank, dude.

[Assistant] You were supposed to meet me at the galleria.


[User] You were supposed to meet me at the galleria.

[Assistant] It doesn't solve the problem of me getting out of here. I don't know how to get out of this mall.


[User] It doesn't solve the problem of me getting out of here. I don't know how to get out of this mall.

[Assistant] You gotta just follow any exit signs you see.


[User] You gotta just follow any exit signs you see.

[Assistant] Oh, I see somebody going down a ramp. I'm going to follow them going down a ramp. I'm going to go down a ramp. I'll try to find you as soon as I can. Maybe like and tomorrow.


[User] Oh, I see somebody going down a ramp. I'm going to follow them going down a ramp. I'm going to go down a ramp. I'll try to find you as soon as I can. Maybe like and tomorrow.

[Assistant] Yeah I don't know if we're ever gonna find each other.


[User] Ill, let you know when im back at the car.

[Assistant] Where does the ramp lead,


[User] Where does the ramp lead,

[Assistant] It's taking me it looks like it's taking me down, so I guess the outer part of this mall is like oddly shaped down, even though it's it's an optical illusion. It's like okay, whatever.


[User] It's taking me it looks like it's taking me down, so I guess the outer part of this mall is like oddly shaped down, even though it's it's an optical illusion. It's like okay, whatever.

[Assistant] I've never heard anything like that before.


[User] Oh my god I can't believe the elevator just stopped. We're like between seven and eight and we're we're never getting home. I swear to god.

[Assistant] Like everything that can go wrong has gone wrong today. It's like murphy's law of the whole day. We're so close to the hotel.


[User] Yeah don't forget you they forgot your luggage too they lost it.

[Assistant] Oh my god well I mean look we can't say that we didn't come on a trip to go for an adventure and then not have an adventure already because it's certainly been one


[User] Oh my god well I mean look we can't say that we didn't come on a trip to go for an adventure and then not have an adventure already because it's certainly been one

[Assistant] Did you press the button for the firemen,


[User] Did you press the button for the firemen,

[Assistant] Yeah yeah oh hold on somebody's talking yep we're stuck we are stuck we would love to get into our room if we could I would love to order some food please


[User] Yeah yeah oh hold on somebody's talking yep we're stuck we are stuck we would love to get into our room if we could I would love to order some food please

[Assistant] Can we place an order with room service through the elevator intercom,


[User] Can we place an order with room service through the elevator intercom,

[Assistant] Oh my god, let me call him back. Hey, yeah, we're the people stuck in the elevator. Um, is it cool? Can we just like put in an order so that maybe it's ready by the time we get up to the next floor? Oh, yeah, no, we're not joking. That's not a joke, man. I'm starving. I have to eat. It's been like 12 hours since my last meal. Um, yeah, go ahead, read off the menu. Oh, do you want fish and chips?


[User] Oh my god, let me call him back. Hey, yeah, we're the people stuck in the elevator. Um, is it cool? Can we just like put in an order so that maybe it's ready by the time we get up to the next floor? Oh, yeah, no, we're not joking. That's not a joke, man. I'm starving. I have to eat. It's been like 12 hours since my last meal. Um, yeah, go ahead, read off the menu. Oh, do you want fish and chips?

[Assistant] Yeah, that sounds good. Yeah, sure.


[User] Yeah, fish and chips sounds great. Two orders of that and like, lots of fries. Like, pile it on, baby. Pile those fries and lots of ketchup. Uh, yeah, we're the women stuck in the elevator between seven and eight. Um, probably where we're sleeping for the night at this point. Um, so, uh, send it on up, would ya?

[Assistant] Maybe they can just hoist it down from up above and we can, like, grab it through the ceiling.


[User] Maybe they can just hoist it down from up above and we can, like, grab it through the ceiling.

[Assistant] Um yeah yeah maybe ah yeah well we are starting it looks like think we started to move nope nope


[User] Hey, so what kind of weather do you think well be having this weekend?

[Assistant] Ah well, chet, that's a very good question. I will refer to the board over here. We can see that on saturday, we have highs of seventy two and lows in the fifty s. But on sunday, we're going to experience a little bit of drizzle right in the morning. But by the end of the day, things should clear up.


[User] Oh, no, no. Well, I mean, it's ah it's not that far.

[Assistant] That far. Okay, good to know. Good to know. I feel like as ah as a person who's just moved here, I don't know anything about the l a. Streets.


[User] Ah okay but if if we lose if we lose the game, does the same apply, or,

[Assistant] Always. Ah if we lose the game, it's not so bad usually. It's it's pretty bad when when we win. The frat row is just it's nuts. And you don't want to go right onto frat row. You you want to keep going straight on expo you're going to turn right and merge on to I think it's the one hundred and one that'll take you to the five right there. It's just a brief little merge. Maybe it's the ten,


[User] That's a pretty broad question there. Um are are you are you talking like like a quiet wilderness, like, backpacking kind of getaway, or are you talking like tropical beach, or are you talking like, you know, like, you want to go to a city and go out dancing, you know, and and, like, have a crazy time, what what kind of vacation are we talking about here,

[Assistant] I'm yeah I think i'm i'm leaning more towards the city. I think I want to be in and kind of a cool nightlife area somewhere somewhere exciting and fun where there's lots to do.


[User] Where is the best place to get clam chowder?

[Assistant] Ah and everywhere, everywhere everywhere the the restaurant on the corner, the the little you know, the little food truck on on the corner everywhere


[User] That most fans at the sox game.

[Assistant] Yeah everyone's different everyone's different


[User] I mean, it's perfectly safe to visit during an eruption.

[Assistant] Never heard anyone say that before.


[User] It sounds ah it sounds pretty magnificent um you you didn't catch my pun there magma-nificent ah

[Assistant] Ooh, ooh, I didn't, and you got, you got me.


[User] Ooh, ooh, I didn't, and you got, you got me.

[Assistant] Ah yeah gotta watch out for me with those puns.


[User] Ah yeah gotta watch out for me with those puns.

[Assistant] Boy, I wasn't expecting it. It came in hot I mean, there's a penis museum, but this is the only museum that I know about, so we don't want to talk about that. Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah it's the only one I heard of. So ah


[User] Boy, I wasn't expecting it. It came in hot I mean, there's a penis museum, but this is the only museum that I know about, so we don't want to talk about that. Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah it's the only one I heard of. So ah

[Assistant] But I want to know more about that.


[User] But I want to know more about that.

[Assistant] Yep, yep we could talk about like landmarks yeah yeah perfect yeah


[User] Um man, i'm so jealous. I wish I had some time off to go see something exotic.

[Assistant] Ah you and me both. But he he was asking me for advice, and he can't he can't go overseas because he's got a bit of a legal situation. And um I was trying to think, like, where where I should suggest. And um new orleans popped into my mind because I had ah had a few wild nights there ah back in two thousand and nineteen.


[User] Ah you and me both. But he he was asking me for advice, and he can't he can't go overseas because he's got a bit of a legal situation. And um I was trying to think, like, where where I should suggest. And um new orleans popped into my mind because I had ah had a few wild nights there ah back in two thousand and nineteen.

[Assistant] What I was going to say yeah I was going to say that's where I had my bachelorette party. And oh, yeah, man, best place i've ever been. I think it was definitely my favorite city i've visited in the u s.


[User] Um no way wow, strong strong best place you've ever been. That's strong words to endorse a

[Assistant] It's, you know, it's a cool city. You gotta, you gotta admit, Bourbon Street feels really, really nice. It's just an energy, an electric energy.


[User] Ah oh, my goodness. I I look at pictures that I that I took the and the couple nights that I was there, just like seventeen beaded necklaces hanging off my body. I don't know how any of them got there. And i'm like just got this just like like ridiculous expression on my face. And i'm like and i'm smiling

[Assistant] Sounds like a wild time yeah you know where else I love also in the city, if if your friend doesn't do the party stuff, I think the world war ii museum in new orleans is the best museum in the united states. I think yeah, it's it's it's tons of they have the actual airplanes hanging up everywhere. You can listen to hours of archived footage, archival footage of of ah different veterans or people affected by the war. It's it's a pretty cool place.


[User] Shakira is a hip-hop artist, and i'm i'm pretty sure she won a grammy a couple years ago who is khloe kardashian,

[Assistant] Chloe kardashian is one of the kardashian clan. I believe she's the oldest mem sister, but i'm and don't quote me on that who is jennifer lopez,


[User] Danica patrick um is a senator from florida. Who's adele,

[Assistant] Adele is a famous singer. Who is Lil Wayne?


[User] Novak Djokovic is a famous tennis player. Who is Tom Hanks?

[Assistant] Tom hanks he was in that movie can't think of the name of it who's jay z,


[User] Um we want to keep them cooked yeah yeah now, so once I have the eggs ready and the potatoes ready, what do I do next,

[Assistant] So um you know once you get the ratio oh, as far as the ratio I would just do just one egg at a time. You know, whip up one egg, pour it in, mix it. You know, if it still needs some more, just keep adding them until it seems like it's at about the right consistency so then the next key key ingredient is matzo meal.


[User] The spices going first. That's that's kind of me remember that.

[Assistant] Yeah keep the you can throw in ginger and garlic. Those are always good, fragrant. You can make the house smell really good from the very beginning and then really all you have to do is throw in the vegetables or the the meat that you want. I personally like throwing in like potatoes or broccoli or whatever I have on hand that's going to go bad and i


[User] But well, hold on. Hold on. I got to write all this down. Kind of kind of cat catamum. What is what is that,

[Assistant] Um cardamom cardamom is just a spice. It's my personal favorite sweet spice. People some are hit or miss on it. You don't have to put cardamom c a r d a m u m i'm not a speller but I think yeah, it's


[User] Um cardamom cardamom is just a spice. It's my personal favorite sweet spice. People some are hit or miss on it. You don't have to put cardamom c a r d a m u m i'm not a speller but I think yeah, it's

[Assistant] Ah well, this ain't a spelling bee. I'm not holding i'm not ah not quizzing you on that.


[User] And me, too. And I mean, I haven't seen that since I was a kid, but it just reminded me, like, that was just that was just, like, the greatest, you know, golden age of disney movies um that was just such a great, such a great story. And those songs, like just they really just they really capture your heart. You know what I mean,

[Assistant] I love little mermaid, but I have to say my favorite is probably the lion king. I think I think that soundtrack beats out little mermaid for me.


[User] Oh ok you you prefer you prefer little mermaid

[Assistant] I mean, you know, just can't wait to be king. Yeah, ok, that's all well and good. But this mermaid wants to be part of this different world. And she's, you know, claiming her you know, claiming her independence and and she's, you know, she's getting a pair of legs. And that's like scary and exciting. And it's a metaphor for so much. It's like such a loaded such a loaded, you know, piece of mythology there. And and those and those songs are just so just so smart. You know what I mean,


[User] Or, well, maybe led zeppelin.

[Assistant] What's up, what's up there, i'm does rock band count, like does bowie count as a rock he's he's a solo artist, so it does not it's not a band, right because bowie to me is like the epitome so yeah oh, man, i've been listening to bowie all week, and I just I have to say he's he's by far the best rock and roll musician of all time bar none.


[User] Ah time out time out. Um you know, I totally respect david bowie. But if you're going to claim he's the best rock musician of all time what about what about the who,

[Assistant] Okay, I mean, I I get the who, but but you can't compare the who to, like, modern love to to so many great, great bowie songs. We got we got who do you think compares in the who to bowie,


[User] Ah fair enough, you got a point there, but let me let me let me just say this um um quote perhaps one of the most important quotes in like all of pop music meet the new boss same as the old boss now has anyone ever uttered a more profound statement than that that has so much you know so much relevance meet the new boss same as the old boss

[Assistant] You make a fair point. You make a fair point. It's a good, great song, great great band but but man, bowie bowie just he he nails it. He's got he's got all the different songs. He's got a each album has such a a unique perspective to it that I feel like the who you can sometimes you don't know which album each song came from. Right. Like sometimes you hear a song and you're not sure.


[User] True. When you said the lead singer's name, I realized I had gotten the doors and the who mixed up. So that's me owning up to my own yeah my own misunderstanding there

[Assistant] Well, well, you're you're forgiven if if you're not a who fan you didn't get that joke there. You know, it's a song ah you are forgiven, you are forgiven, you are forgiven, forgiven, forgiven, forgiven anyway, i'm i'm getting carried away there.


[User] I'm going to listen to the who on my way home

[Assistant] Ah well, i'll tell you what, i'll listen to some david bowie. We'll ah we'll both inform each other's musical taste. How's that,


[User] Sumo wrestling.

[Assistant] Sumo wrestling. It's like wrestling right, like, yeah. But like like such big guys going after each other, right, like, like there's something fun about just watching two scantily clad men fight over the cultural, beautiful art that is ancient, right,


[User] Ah boy, let's do it. Here on, let's do it. I'm ready.

[Assistant] Ha ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.


[User] Ha ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

[Assistant] Ah oh right first time ever in any fight somebody's been on me.


[User] Yes, yes, you're right, I messed up my words there.

[Assistant] Ah ha ha ha ha ha


[User] Ah ha ha ha ha ha

[Assistant] Thank you yep, thank you.


[User] Ah

[Assistant] Good catch so hollywood has this thing where they keep making books into movies, and they need to they need to knock it off because they keep butchering all of these different stories, and i'm um um mad about it.


[User] Ok, now, um and I can definitely think of some you know, some books that they've misrepresented. But I don't think on the whole you can say that that like every book adaptation, every film adaptation of a book has, you know, gone the wrong way

[Assistant] I mean, but if we talk about all of the specific examples, I think we're going to realize that they're not so good. Like, the lovely bones, did you ever read that book, oh, it's ah it's a book about a a girl it's from the point of view of ah of a little girl who's been murdered, and she's helping her family find who murdered her. And it was like a cal, like it was a on all the book lists for a while of books to read great film or a great book. And then they made it into a film and they cast mark wahlberg in it and it's just bad. It's just bad. They completely marky mark. He's going to try to find who killed her and it's it just loses all of its poignance and all of its,


[User] Just a I think it's really the taika watiti directed the film I personally am a big taika fan so so any comedy you can inject into the film into into thor for example was was great black panther I think was just a cultural movement and everybody everybody should see it and enjoy it and experience it

[Assistant] I hundred percent agree with you on that. Black black panther was mind-blowing. But I mean, as far as far as, like, a comedic take on the superhero genre it doesn't get much funnier than aquaman and harley quinn and the with the the birds of prey and the fantabulous emancipation of one harley quinn. There's there's nothing funnier than that in the genre I would argue.


[User] Me too. I haven't been to l a. And too long.

[Assistant] I know. Awesome. Well, I thought maybe we'd start by just going to see a movie somewhere. I think that's a classic l. A.


[User] And oh, the the sixteen, amc sixteen,

[Assistant] Yeah, the a m c. Sixteen. Exactly. That that tom cruise came in to give, like, a q and a surprise thing. Yeah. So if we go to any theater, I think we should go to a m c. Sixteen because if there's any chance that tom cruise will come into the building, we might as well


[User] I I just cause you know everything else is more convenient, it's a little out of my way but if you're here, we might as well go,

[Assistant] Let's do it. Let's do it. We we can ah you know we we can take the tram from um you know from the from the the park and ride,


[User] Ah sweet, awesome. I'm glad you know the way. Let's let's check it out amazing.

[Assistant] Yeah all right. So do you want to split one large popcorn,


[User] Yeah okay cool.

[Assistant] Ah yeah


[User] Um to crunch. Let's do that.

[Assistant] Awesome sweet.


[User] Ah yes and no tomato absolutely lettuce no, I use kale.

[Assistant] Oh, i've never thought to use kale, but that's a great idea.


[User] Yes what about you, what are your what what burgers are like you know your like monumental burgers of choice,

[Assistant] Monumental burger of choice. I really love the morrison in atwater village. I've talked about it before. It's um the morrison, number one rated place on yelp um when I ate meat, loved their burgers. When I don't eat meat, love their veggie burgers. They just do them right. And it's like the best burger in and all of l a.


[User] Pinnacle of burgers. That that should be there. You should do a commercial for them, the pinnacle of burgers. I like that.

[Assistant] I think I think they would hire me. I hope so. So I can talk about their burgers all day. So


[User] Yeah they're like one of us, and they don't give you a ticket.

[Assistant] That's right. You know it.


[User] Wait and wait a minute. Wait a minute but oh, my god. I think you might be right.

[Assistant] I think I am right. How do we stop it from blowing up?


[User] Um looking it says it says schroeder x nine c five.

[Assistant] How do you spell "Schroeder"?


[User] Flip the whole thing upside and and ok, um

[Assistant] I flipped the whole thing upside down.


[User] Ok, um what do we do with the battery,

[Assistant] I want to find out where the bomb came from. Could you call the bomb company for me?


[User] Ah you you can, but short videos so like like you can't post, like, an hour lecture, for instance, but like like a ten second video, something entertaining, you can.

[Assistant] How do I make friends on instagram,


[User] So technically, they're not called friends. They're they're called followers well, you you follow someone and then they can follow you back if they want to.

[Assistant] How many followers do I get?


[User] That works you're you're now spaz nineteen eighty five chauncey.

[Assistant] Ninety eighty seven but I will remember nineteen eighty five


[User] So it's it's like a country, but well, but it's it's like part of a country it's it's a it's a place it's a collection of cities and towns run by a central government.

[Assistant] And what is central government,


[User] Ah palm trees near the coast. Lots of palm trees, although the the most of them are they're not native. They were they were planted but there's lots of palm trees.

[Assistant] What is a palm tree?


[User] Um and that's what I meant, the the middle.

[Assistant] In the middle, ah but what about the bottom,


[User] Well, it's thick at the bottom, then it's then it's stretched out. It's it's like a long neck and and then there are those there are those green leaves up at the top.

[Assistant] Is that the only kind of tree in California?


[User] There's a ah great many. There's well, there's there's ah there's yosemite national park there's there's there's death valley there's the the sierra madre is very beautiful there's there's the the san gabriel mountain range there's the santa monica mountain range there's a lot of mountains in california.

[Assistant] That is a lot of mountains.


[User] Um i'm not an expert, but I believe there's rattlesnakes in the desert I want to say coyotes I could be wrong.

[Assistant] What is a Coyote?


[User] Vanilla in a chocolate cake, okay.

[Assistant] Surprising right.


[User] Yeah she's very good at folding in milk.

[Assistant] That she is.


[User] She's planning a great party, I bet.

[Assistant] It looks like it will be a three-tier cake. For a big party.


[User] Always is.

[Assistant] She always is looks like she's using a nice chamomile tea to make her own version of tea.


[User] Now feed feed the right string underneath the left string.

[Assistant] Underneath the left string,


[User] I would really like a cup of coffee, but i dont know how to make one.

[Assistant] It's actually pretty easy I could show you if you'd like.


[User] Ok, so six tablespoons of of ground-up coffee beans ah put that on the the filter and then and then I I fill this tank with water,

[Assistant] Ah this tank here. We close the lid above the filter and we're going to put the water into the tank and then all we have to do is press start.


[User] For how long,

[Assistant] It'll take approximately ten minutes, but maybe a little less.


[User] Okay green green beans, do we want, like, like like one big bag of frozen green beans, what are you thinking here,

[Assistant] I think the fresh ones will be better for everybody, but if they are out of the fresh because I think they might be out of the fresh because it's so close to the closing time that we probably.


[User] Um okay. Okay. I'll remember that um but we we have enough cranberry sauce,

[Assistant] I think so. Let me check no, we're out of cranberry sauce and we're also out of pie crusts. And so I have pumpkin.


[User] Ah but you're you're the best you're on top of it. You're the best.

[Assistant] Thank you, so are you, look at you. But we need cutlery, and I don't want to do all those dishes, so...


[User] Cutlery, we we what do you mean, we we got the whole shelf of knives there. What are you talking about,

[Assistant] You know but it's going to be so many people. If we just do plastic, we can throw it away and not worry about the dishes. And I know that that's not very good for the environment. But, like,


[User] Case in point, got it.

[Assistant] They're gonna close in fifteen minutes, so we gotta


[User] Ah okay, okay, okay. Um okay, ah ah ah stuffing do we have do you have the right kind of stuffing,

[Assistant] I think we have the right kind of stuffing, but you might want to get an extra kind just because your dad doesn't like the kind that's got the nuts in it.


[User] Right, um okay, um we're gonna eat like a giant salad, right,

[Assistant] We're gonna need a giant salad. We're gonna need ah carrots for the salad. We're gonna need green goddess dressing, so I want you to grab two of those.


[User] Ah love gringa-tis dressing. It's the best.

[Assistant] Yes, yes, it's gonna be a great salad, but, uh, you gotta get two of them. You gotta get two of them, cause it's gotta be a big salad.


[User] Ah maybe even three.

[Assistant] If you want to take the car, you can take the car, but I think you could


[User] Like I like to drown it and and dress and and that's just me.

[Assistant] I mean, if you want to get three, go for it, but you got, you're gonna have like three minutes to get down there.


[User] Ah don't don't worry don't worry about my running shoes. Ah ok. But but hold on. Hold on. I mean make sure I got everything here. So um what about oh, do do we have enough butter,

[Assistant] Ah we don't have enough butter. That's a great i'm glad you asked. We need we need maybe some Kerrygold butter. Can you get like the good butter, not the not the, like,


[User] Yeah you mean the you mean the organic stuff, right,

[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, like the good irish butter and not like the not like the crap that they serve. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We want we want those mashed potatoes are gonna be good. We have plenty of potatoes. We have plenty of milk. We have plenty of cream. We're gonna be fine on all that maybe grab some salt,


[User] So speak speak speaking irish, you just got me thinking. Um do we have enough beer, do we yeah should I get some guinness,

[Assistant] So yeah, grab grab a couple dark beers. I think we have enough light beers. We've got some corona and we've got some modelo. But I think if I think your uncle really likes the guinness stuff, so so maybe grab a couple cases of guinness.


[User] If they got em. If they got em.

[Assistant] Yeah, they're gonna have IPAs. It's Ralph's. They've got enough. It's gonna be low. I don't know.


[User] You know you got me all confused. Come on, i'm i'm i've got to get down there. They're going to close.

[Assistant] Just go, go, go, and i'll meet you.


[User] Yeah okay, so now, all right, so now we're gonna bring it over here so we can work with it okay, um do you have my tool kits,

[Assistant] It's kind of hard to hear you. It's just so many cars flying right by me.


[User] I got to go back in. But um you you should be good. You should be good to go.

[Assistant] Okay, okay, the brakes are fine, I can just leave it like this,


[User] Yeah, get home safe.

[Assistant] You too. Have a good zoom call. Thank you for your help.


[User] Um oh, man, my phone just died. I'm so sorry. But that's okay. I'm so i'm still gonna get you there. I'm gonna get you there.

[Assistant] I know the way enough, so I think I can get us there. Um if you just keep going straight down this road, um it's gonna turn into into figueroa after like a mile and a half and ah ok, cool.


[User] Yeah no problem. Wait you mean right before the tree or after the tree got it. Ok ok

[Assistant] Good questions. Ok, um and then I think what we're supposed to do is go left up there on on the road that the you know, the the alleyway back behind. I think we can cut through. We don't have to sit through those traffic lights. Yeah, yeah, ok, cool. So just drive through the alley. Perfect um and then I think we're just going to go straight on on ah la brea for for a solid ten ten minutes.


[User] I'm i'm avoiding la brea. There's there's construction.

[Assistant] Oh, yeah, that's right. Um, ok, ok, so skip la brea. Let's go let's let me look at google and what it tells me to do on the google maps. But I think we're going to be ok if yeah, yeah, yeah. I think we're going to be ok if we just keep going if you take a left here and then a right um and we go up washburn, we're fine. We're fine.


[User] Washburn. That's that's right, washburn. Ok, that's a detour.

[Assistant] Yeah yeah yeah. Perfect. You see the detour sign, yeah yeah it's got the nice detour yeah yeah perfect. Ok cool cool um and I think we should be there pretty soon um oh gosh I just got a text from my sister she says it's it's really it's soon it's soon so they're starting to push so we got it we got to go can you i'm sorry yeah i'm sorry I know it's bad to ask you


[User] Driving as fast as I can, ma'am. I want to get you there.

[Assistant] Um yeah awesome oh right there on the left you see it you see it,


[User] Yeah that that one,

[Assistant] Yeah you can just pull into the back and and loop around and and i'll just hop out at the front door. You don't even have to.


[User] You mean where the where the blue sign is,

[Assistant] Yeah where the blue sign is, where it says maternity, yeah, yeah, yeah. Perfect. Awesome. Thank you so much. Okay, thank you so much. Here's five extra bucks.


[User] And right on burbank boulevard.

[Assistant] Right on burbank boulevard. Awesome and ah great. And then ah where where next,


[User] I'm gonna leave you a good review yeah yeah hey, hey, you want you want to um you want to come with me,

[Assistant] Ah you know, it looks like a fun party and my phone is dead. I might as well. Can't keep ubering. Sweet. Let's do it.


[User] I know, I know. It leaves like four thirty. I'm kind of freaking out.

[Assistant] Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, let me help you.


[User] Ah can can you can you look for it after after we get through this list, just just remember that. Remember that look for my windbreaker.

[Assistant] Windbreaker. I'm gonna write it down at the bottom of the list. Windbreaker. Okay, ah it says also, ah it says, um, two, once you, you want your backpack,


[User] Ah good call, good call ok, I got got this one, I got this one, this one yep, um all good on the shorts. Got those.

[Assistant] Um but I would also take some pants, too. Did you get the pants, okay, cool. And then, I think the rest of the stuff is just mostly, like, snacks and stuff, so do you want, like, some it says trail mix. It says,


[User] I got to go. I got to get on the oh, oh, my god. I almost forgot. Um I don't have anyone to feed molly. By any chance, could you could you come in the morning and at night, and.

[Assistant] I can, but i've never fed molly before. I don't know how to do it.


[User] All right. All right. I'm going to go. I'll see you later. Thanks so much.

[Assistant] And thank you. Bye, molly says bye.


[User] And you have ah you have that poncho,

[Assistant] Got the poncho, yes. Uh, I think I could use another jacket though. Could you hand me that one? That's the the green one up there?


[User] Ah oh, wait, hold on. Hold on. Before that, earmuffs.

[Assistant] Earmuffs, earmuffs, I don't know where my earmuffs are.


[User] You put like two check marks by it because you always forget your earmuffs and your ears get like frostbitten.

[Assistant] Okay, okay. Yes, it's true. I'll buy some earmuffs there.


[User] You drive me crazy. You can't can't worry about things like that. We've got to get you to the airport. Come on, come on.

[Assistant] Okay. Well, mom's gonna care. I know, I know, I know. Okay.


[User] Okay, let me let me let me take your suitcase. I'll carry this and and the.

[Assistant] I completely forgot i'm so sorry. I have I didn't get anybody to feed sparky could you could you, I know that's a huge ask. I'm so sorry. I can't believe I forgot.


[User] Only if he's a good only if he's a good boy.

[Assistant] Only if he's a good boy. If he jumps on you a bunch, you don't have to give him a bone, and then he'll associate, it'll be Pavlovian, it'll be good. So thank you so much. Ah okay, thank you. His water bowl, you see his water bowl too, yeah.


[User] Yeah, yeah, i've been rehearsing like crazy, and i'm fully off book. I got it.

[Assistant] I'm so glad. Thank you so much. It's it's so simple, the blocking. You're just gonna enter behind ah stage left. You're gonna walk behind the couch, ok, you're gonna when he says the line, ah I haven't seen you lately you're gonna you're gonna hop over the couch and you're just gonna make yourself comfortable, ok,


[User] Um wave at everyone before ok, ok, got it.

[Assistant] All you have to do it doesn't matter as long as you you don't even really have to wave you just have to put your hand up because that's the cue for us to close the curtain does that make sense,


[User] Um am I wearing the hat in this scene,

[Assistant] Ah yes, you're going to wear the hat in the scene. Do you have the hat, do I need to get you the hat, um our props mistress,


[User] Oh, ah yeah, one more question. So um when when I look at michaela over there, am I like, you know, am I like still like like, you know, seething with with resentment toward her, like I want to kill her,

[Assistant] You're seething with resentment, but but the subtext is that you're in love with her. So so make sure that that that that's coming through. But but it's really the motivation is that you're feeling like you're you're about to kill her. You want to kill her, but it's because you love her so much and can't be with her, right,


[User] I'd i'd love to i'd love to work with you guys again after the show, because, um

[Assistant] Yeah we'd love to have you back. Thank you for being available. We tried a lot of people.


[User] Ah trying to do so like trying to do what, what do you mean do some stuff,

[Assistant] It it doesn't matter. I think all you got to know is their names, right, she's not going to ask you too much about about all the details. They're not, like, huge characters. Rosencrantz, guildenstern, important names. Those are the two when she has the blank, blank person in first hour told me that blank and blank, you're going to need rosencrantz and guildenstern, ok,


[User] Ophelia, ok, she kills herself. She jumps into a lake and yeah, boom.

[Assistant] Whoa, why would you do that,


[User] Whoa, why would you do that,

[Assistant] Because hamlet broke up with her. It's a whole thing. It's like, yeah, it sucks. It's really sad. It's really tragic. Um she's got a beautiful monologue. You're probably going to need to know something from the monologue, but just skip that part because I think.


[User] Because hamlet broke up with her. It's a whole thing. It's like, yeah, it sucks. It's really sad. It's really tragic. Um she's got a beautiful monologue. You're probably going to need to know something from the monologue, but just skip that part because I think.

[Assistant] Wait, wait, just tell me something, like, tell me a line or something.


[User] Wait, wait, just tell me something, like, tell me a line or something.

[Assistant] Ah it's it's ah it's I mean, like, the the things that she's for sure going to ask about are, like, the the soliloquy. You're going to have to fill in some of the blanks on the soliloquy. So it's like to be or not to be, that is a question whether tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune ah she's going to ask about that.


[User] Um like yeah, as a kid, I don't remember it that well.

[Assistant] Pretty sure the lion king is similar or based off of hamlet or something. So, ah I think it's hamlet. Is it hamlet, it might have been a different one.


[User] Wait, wait, can you can you just tell me, like, like I know she likes to see quotes and in essay answers. Can you just tell me,

[Assistant] Yeah, she's the whole who-said-what-to-whose section.


[User] Yeah, that i can use.

[Assistant] You know the part where he's explaining to the actors how to act, basically, it's it's like all meta shakespeare ok, it's, ah speak the speech I pray to you as I pronounced it to you trippingly on the tongue but if you maul it,


[User] I'll probably go see it. I'll probably watch the movie rather than read it. Ah

[Assistant] Yeah I say seeing it is good. Mel gibson his version is really good.


[User] Ok, ok, got that.

[Assistant] Um he's from missouri, did you know that, they're going to ask about it. The the letter s in his name doesn't stand for anything. That's not going to probably be on the quiz, but that was my favorite thing I learned.


[User] I mean everyone knows that. But yeah,

[Assistant] Ah cool. I didn't know. You've been gone for a while, man.


[User] Ah cool. I didn't know. You've been gone for a while, man.

[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, two weeks. I wasn't raised in a cave.