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Feb. 6, 1998
Boston College Ties Providence
Boston College 3, Providence College 3 (OT)
CHESTNUT HILL, Mass. -- Junior forward Marty Reasoner scored a power-play goal with 2:07 remaining in regulation to even the score and give Boston College a 3-3 tie with Providence College in a HOCKEY EAST game at Kelley Rink.
Boston College (16-8-4) outshot the Friars, 35-22, but PC netminder Mark Kane rose to the challenge, finishing with 32 saves.
Providence College (12-11-3) led 2-1 entering the final period and, after BC freshman Bobby Allen tied the game with a power-play goal at 7:42, the Friars regained the lead on freshman Nick Lent's tally at 12:16. Providence retained its advantage until Reasoner netted his 21st goal of the season. BC outshot PC, 17-5, in the third period.
The host Eagles led 1-0 after one period. Freshman Mike Lephart opened the scoring with a goal at 14:27. Providence scored two second-period tallies. Josh MacNevin put the Friars on the board at 8:00 of the middle period, and Jerry Keefe put PC ahead at 13:11.
BC's Allen earned the game's first-star honors, scoring one goal and assisting on Reasoner's tying goal. PC's Lent and Keefe each finished with one goal and one assist.
BC freshman netminder Scott Clemmensen made 19 saves.
Game Notes: Boston College was playing without freshman defenseman Marty Hughes and junior forward Chris Masters. Hughes is sidelined with a broken right ankle, while Masters has a separated left shoulder ... BC returns to action on Monday, February 9, facing Northeastern in the Beanpot's consolation round. Game time is 5 p.m.
at Kelley Rink (Chestnut Hill, Mass.)
Providence (12-11-3).......... 0 2 1 0 - 3
Boston College (16-8-4)...... 1 0 2 0 - 3
BC, Mike Lephart (Jeff Farkas, Blake Bellefeuille) 14:27.
PC, Josh MacNevin (unassisted) 8:00;
PC, Jerry Keefe (Nick Lent, Mike Mader) 13:11;
BC, Bobby Allen (Brian Gionta, Scott Clemmensen) ppg 7:42;
PC, Lent (Keefe, Mader) 12:16;
BC, Marty Reasoner (Allen, Mike Mottau) ppg 17:53.
SAVES: PC, Mark Kane 32; BC, Scott Clemmensen 19.
Official StoreOfficial Online
Acciari Named Hockey East...
On Tuesday, March 18 the Hockey East Association announced that junior forward Noel Acciari has been named the league's Gladiator Best Defensive Forward of...
Men's Hockey Drops 2-1...
In a dramatic game three deciding game of the Hockey East Quarterfinals, the No. 10 Friars fell in overtime by a score of 2-1 to the University of New...
Men's Hockey Defeats New...
Providence's strong play on both the power play and the penalty kill proved to be the difference that propelled the No. 10 Friars to a 2-1 victory over the...
Men's Hockey Edged In...
In game one of the Hockey East Quarterfinals, the No. 10 Providence College men's hockey team fell in overtime, 2-1, to the University of New Hampshire...
No. 2 Seeded Providence To...
After a first round bye, Providence will play host to No. 8 seed New Hampshire for a best-of-three Hockey East Quarterfinal series this weekend at Schneider ...
No. 10 Men's Hockey To Host ...
New Hampshire and Providence have knocked each other out of the Hockey East Tournament each of the last two seasons.
Men's Hockey Moves To No...
The Providence College men's hockey team moved up to No. 10 in the USCHO.com poll and to No. 11 in the USA Today/USA Hockey Magazine poll after a weekend...
Gillies Named A Mike Richter...
Junior goaltender Jon Gillies has been named a nominee for the 2015 Mike Richter Award, which honors the most outstanding goaltender in NCAA Div. I.


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Tarun Tahiliani holds London showcase event with Pernia’s Pop-Up Studio
Traditional wear designer Tarun Tahiliani has launched a showcase for its spring/ summer 2020 collection in London, UK, at luxury multi-brand retailer Pernia’s Pop-Up Studio in the city.
On January 24, Tarun Tahiliani launched its latest collection in the UK for the first time, the brand announced on Facebook. The exclusive showcase at Pernia’s Pop-Up Shop’s boutique in the city’s Mayfair district runs until January 26 and features an array of bridal and occasion wear for the spring wedding season.
“The Kashida Collection” is designed as a light-weight take on the designer’s signature opulent and embellished designs. By using light, supple textiles and intricate printing methods, Tahiliani has created lehengas and sarees that are finely detailed yet easy to move in.
The collection features a colour palette of rose and dusky pinks as well as tangerines, golds, and silvers. Tahiliani launched the collection in India at his flagship store in his Mehrauli flagship store in New Delhi and his flagship in DLF’s luxury Emporio Mall in Vasant Kunj in December, 2019.
Tarun Tahiliani launched his eponymous brand in 1990 and specialises in Indian traditional and bridal wear. With flagship stores in New Delhi, Mumbai, Kolkata, and Hyderabad, the brand also retails from multi-brand boutiques in India, Japan, the UK, and Nigeria.
Copyright © 2021 FashionNetwork.com All rights reserved.

domain: artistic


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thats really creative
I love it!
Wonderful models! If only I had a group near me that played Napoleonic wargamesAlso, I'd kill to be able to draw like you!
You should light them all on fire.
i like napoleon
Looks like a fun hobby. I bet it keeps you busy.
hello blog of note congratulations on your acheivement
I love that action figureDont forget to see my blog manThank yoiu
dude your amazing. you should check ouy my blog at http://icantbwrong.blogspot.com/
Inspirational work and thought-provoking articles. I really like your basing for these skirmishers. Great ideas, thanks, Dean
Post a Comment

domain: hobby


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And then the remorse, the poignant sweet
This I deduced from many details of her compact, neat, curiously immature body. It was erected and brought her by a pimply brute of a boy in a greasy bow-tie who eyed my fragile child in her thin cotton frock with carnal deliberation. None indeed—but those muddy, moony eyes of hers, that singular warmth emanating from her! A lady who lived opposite Mrs. The only definite sexual events that I can remember as having occurred before my thirteenth birthday (that is, before I first saw my little Annabel) were: a solemn, decorous and purely theoretical talk about pubertal surprises in the rose garden of the school with an American kid, the son of a then celebrated motion-picture actress whom he seldom saw in the three-dimensional world; and some interesting reactions on the part of my organism to certain photographs, pearl and umbra, with infinitely soft partings, in Pichon's sumptuous Le Beaute Humaine that that I had filched from under a mountain of marble-bound Graphics in the hotel library. And I had made her that. "Concentrate," I said, "on the thought of Dolly Haze whom you kidnapped—"
"I did not! And when finally all the waterfalls had stopped, and the enchanted hunters were sound asleep, the avenue under the window of my insomnia, to the west of my wake—a staid, eminently residential, dignified alley of huge trees—degenerated into the despicable haunt of gigantic trucks roaring through the wet and windy night. Gently I tug on the silk. ARMAND
You would never give up life. "
"Oh, chucks," he said. He rapidly and clumsily sticks in another. And presently I got the whole story. Basically she is a lovely—"
"I beg your pardon," I said, "what zones? MADELEINE
My daughter. I was led upstairs, and to the left—into "my" room. But it keeps the blood warm. My web is spread all over the house as I listen from my chair where I sit like a wily wizard. I just interviewed a genuine hero, a cop who -
You'd have to have a lot of tape for my story. Juncea puellula, jo pensavo fondissime, nobserva nihil quidquam; but, of course, in another moment I might have committed some dreadful blunder; fortunately, she returned to the treasure box. A series of police sirens go by, piercing the night sky. LOUIS (VO)
For years I had not savoured a human. I saw Lolita's eyes, and they seemed to be more calculating than frightened. This proved impossible. Took advantage of my utter helplessness. It turned out to be much too flat for holding my bulky chessmen, but I kept it—using it for a totally different purpose. She wre her first cloth coat with a fur collar; there was a small brown cap on my favorite hairdo—the fringe in front and the swirl at the sides and the natural curls at the back—and her damp-dark moccasins and white socks were more sloppy than ever. "
The garbled license numbers left by all these Persons and Orgons and Morells and Trapps only told me that motel keepers omit to check if guests' cars are accurately listed. Her writing hand stopped. Claudia, sitting with an easel and sketch-pad, sketching the bay of Naples. I went to find Rita who introduced me with her vin triste smile to a pocket-sized wizened truculently tight old man saying this was—what was the name again, son?


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There was a method to my madness when, last week, I was asking around Instagram for poets to contribute to a new project, seemingly, around the subject of Breakfast. The responses I received to this off-the-wall idea ranged from no response to surprise, confusion, excitement, literal light.
From my vantage point, and discerning by the results below, it appears that human & humane connection via social media is possible. Or, more precisely, all roads lead back to the Original Wheel.
We (those who participated in the first Humane Connection round) hopefully already know that humane & human connection is possible via poetry. Therefore, for further exploration in future versions of this project, my question now is: How does the poet achieve humane connection? With the hypothesis that this process or 'achievement' or 'end' may not be an achievement or end at all, and might instead be the Original Wheel. My hypothesis, now, is that human connection is not an end to poetry, human connection is not an achievement of the poet, rather--human & humane connection is what brought the poet to the poem in the first place. The original wheel. Questions revolving around this hypothesis: What may the different 'paths' to & from this reason for coming to the poem (humane connection) look like? How does each poet understand, or find mystery within, the connection as they themselves understand & find mystery within this phenomena of human connection, this desire or appreciation for knowing & being known? Also, what might be other aspect of connecting, relating to and empathizing with one's fellow human beings that seems to be beyond knowledge. Is there such a state or phenomena? What might influence a forging & possessing of gratitude for connecting with one's fellow human beings, aside from knowledge? Etcetera.
Side note: The format for publishing these results seems to be double-pronged at this point. So for further results, and editions of my Humane Connection project, all results will be published in 2 sections: POEMS & RECOMMENDATIONS.
In any situation, below my introduction here, you will find the beginning results to my Humane Connection project. Thank you to everyone who contributed poems & recommendations for the first round of this project. Cheers to the poets, cheers to poetry.
A Daily Ritual
Making a good bowl of oatmeal Takes time; is like making an altar,
An offering of gratitude to the body:
Soaking the oats while making tea, preferably chamomile with Rosemary, let them sit for a while to take in the water.
After drinking tea, opening the pot, turning on the flame and stirring.
Stirring until it all becomes one mass,
Slowly pouring in the cinnamon and the anise until brown, until thick, Until it is a reflection of your own body’s need to be present in the world.
Then carefully scooping it from the pot to the bowl, sprinkling Chia seed and flax,
Topping with strawberries, blueberries and walnuts,
Dancing around the bowl
As if a Buddhist monk painting the ground with the sands of time,
Possessed like by some Holy Spirit,
Knowing this creation has already nourished your body in its making.
Sherese Francis @afutureancient
salsa, maybe orange
juice on the horizon. Sweet
peppers and hot
with eggs over
easy while cooling on a light
K Weber @midwesternskirt
of an uncle
on the lake
just the eating
Barton Smock @bartonsmock
Sometimes i take it & run
Sometimes it's already running
A fried egg slick
off the pan
with salt & pepper
Peanut butter toast
with banana slices
spark the spirit
Cereals loaded with sugar
are no good for the teeth
I knew a cat who used to take
a 12oz can of orange soda
97 cents a pop at the time
Every morning I'd see him
Turning more & more orange
Daniel Cyran @saintredwoodpoems
I’m hypoglycemic so breakfast is a must, unless I want to pass out. Most days it’s Earl Gray tea & oatmeal, but often it’s an omelette, or eggs and toast and a meat like sausage or bacon. Or waffles, I love waffles.
Joel Dias-Porter @djreneg8d
Oatmeal. Keeps me uninflamed.
Joe Hall @joe_hall_joe_hall

domain: literature


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I'll play this, not sure how many times though.
well dont expect the world yet ;), we still have major problems
Damn straight; fucking awesome.
That was good
By far your best. I love the easter egg.
newgrounds.com — Your #1 online entertainment & artist community! All your base are belong to us.


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Tolga & Walkamin
Tolga Caravan Park
Tolga Cabins and Van Park is 5 kilometres away from the main Town of Atherton located near the Tolga Scrub of Kennedy Highway, beside the sports complex which has fitness equipment, barbeque area and playground. We have a few onsite caravans with annex and a few cabins catering for overnight guest, local workers, semi permanent residents and we also cater for the budget conscious travellers who want to explore the Atherton Tablelands at a reasonable rate. Phone: 4095 4306
Allawah Retreat's romantic luxury Atherton Tablelands Accommodation nestle on 150 acres of Australian native bush high on a ridge overlooking the picturesque Atherton Tablelands.The romantic self contained lodge accommodation with heated deck spas and private plunge pool offers privacy, peace and tranquility for couples with mountain walking tracks and panoramic views across the Atherton Tablelands.

domain: travel


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Being a fan of SF/Fantasy I’d go with Octavia E Butler’s classic, ‘Kindred’. It’s an extraordinarily moving and resonant story of an African-American woman sent back through time from the late 1970s to meet her ancestors in the early 1800s. Butler is a writer of exceptional power and beauty, a multiple Hugo and Nebula award winner, and well worth seeking out. And ‘Kindred’ is as powerful today as it was in 1979 when it was written.
On the subject of recent dates - We have here in the UK, quite rightly, been critically examining our history regarding slavery. To put this in perspective however, I suggest a visit to Suakin, in Sudan. There is a chilling museum there on the site of the last LEGAL slave market, which closed only in 1945. Trade in black Africans by Arabs. And let's not kid ourselves that this trade has stopped, albeit no longer legal.
Fully aware that modern slavery remains a major problem. I've been researching the subject quite a bit, both from the perspective of human trafficking (my novel), and South East Asia. I was the team leader for an evaluation of support to the former Soviet Union. A component included anti-trafficking (human and drugs). Plus there is the issue of migrant labour in the Middle East, much of which can be classified as modern slavery. Not to forget the UK today
Not American but Ordinary People by Diana Evans, about middle-class Black Londoners, impressed me a lot. Incidentally it has a scene written by an omniscient narrator - interesting for anyone wondering if omniscient narration still exists in contemporary novels :) It's a heartwrenching scene too - the effects of knife crime in London.
Not a novel but Brit(ish) by Afua Hirsch is interesting about growing up mixed race in Britain and wondering where you most belong. Again a middle-class perspective, informative about how some traditional British social structures work.
Again not a novel but a short story: 'Sonny's Blues' by James Baldwin, set in 1950s New York. The writing is just the bee's knees. Here's the opening:
"I read about it in the paper, in the subway, on my way to work. I read it, and I couldn't believe it, and I read it again. Then perhaps I just stared at it, at the newsprint spelling out his name, spelling out the story. I stared at it in the swinging lights of the subway car, and in the faces and bodies of the people, and in my own face, trapped in the darkness which roared outside."
There are three metaphors, I think, for being a man of colour in the US, and just in the first few lines.
It's in The Oxford Book of American Short Stories, ed. Joyce Carol Oates. New York: Oxford University Press, 1992, but I think you can find it elsewhere too.
Thank you Libby. I'm very interested in London issues and your recomendations are going into my reading list. I found a link to Sonny's Blues by James Baldwin here.A great story with a distinctive voice, just shows how you can say important things with simple words, the theme melts with the structure. Bee's knees indeed...
Here are a couple of books that I would recommend, all of which have been published in the last 5 years:
Blackassby A. Igoni Barrett - The story begins when Furo Wariboko, a young Nigerian man living in Lagos, wakes up in the morning to go to a job interview. After waking up, he discovers that he's turned into a white man with pale skin, red hair and green eyes. The only remnant of his former self is his black ass. The novel explores what it's like for a black man to gain white privilege in the biggest city in Africa.
A Brief History of Seven Killings by Marlon James - It's a story of post-colonial Jamaica told over several decades and by a dozen narrators. The story looks at gang warfare, the political corruption in Jamaica that was present from the moment it gained independence, the attempted assassination of Bob Marley before the Smile Jamaica Concert on December 5, 1976, and its aftermath, which includes a foray into the crack wars of New York City in the 1980's. The novel won several awards including the 2015 Man Booker Prize. I highly recommend it. Although, you should be warned that it's really violent. It can feel at times like James is to writing what Tarantino is to film.
I should also note that his latest novel, Black Leopard, Red Wolf, is on my list of books I intend to read this summer. It has been said that it is the first book in a planned trilogy of an epic fantasy quest full of monsters, sex and violence, set in a mythic version of ancient Africa. It has also been characterized by Lucy Feldman, the Books Editor of TIME Magazine, as "an African Game of Thrones."
Queenie by Candice Carty-Williams - The story of Queenie Jenkins, a 25-year-old Jamaican Brit living in London who is having the worst year of her life. The story explores interracial relationships, what it is like to be viewed as nothing more than a sex object, what it is like to be the token black person at the office, and what it is like to come from a troubled home and how the suppressed trauma from that history can come back to haunt you as an adult.
Such a Fun Age by Kiley Reid - I have not yet read this book, but it's on my short list for books I intend to read over the summer. If I had it my way, I'd be reading it right now, but all the copies at the library are out and there were over 30 holds placed on it before I put mine in. It's the story of a young African-American woman who is accused of kidnapping the 3-year old white girl that she is babysitting, and the events that follow it. The book is supposed to delve into the themes of interracial relations, privilege, wealth, and millennial anxieties. It has also been described as "a satire of the white pursuit of wokeness." It has receive a heaping amount of praise in the press. I was convinced it would be a good read after I saw Reid interviewed by Trevor Noah a few months ago.
I recently read 'A Drop of Midnight' by Jason Diakite. It is the memoir of a mixed race Swedish rapper who takes time to research his father's roots in New York and the southern states. It is a very personal story and you get a sense of his awareness being awakened as he travels.The relationship with his father and uncles is also very interesting as they show no desire to revisit the past that he seeks. He then gets an entirely different perspective when he tracks down relatives stateside.
The book is way off my usual reading list but i found it very interesting and moving at times. It is a very human scale story.


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So one day you find yourself happily doing your thing and God speaks. You think: “did I just hear correctly? You want me to do what?! You are giving me what?! Did He just say that?! Uhm.. well.. I didn’t ask for this, but it’s quite exciting..”
Maybe you are in that situation where God has told you a secret about yourself or about your future. You were super excited to hear His voice and excited because of what He said. Then you start sharing it with people and they start looking at you funny and questioning whether God could really tell you such a thing. Suddenly doubt creeps in and you become discouraged. “Can this really be? Was this really God or was it my imagination?”
I have spoken to a few people lately who seem to be facing this issue. God is a speaking God and He loves telling us things about ourselves and the amazing plans which He has for us. But more often than not, He only gives you one piece of the entire puzzle and you wonder: “how on earth is this going to fit into my life or how will this work out?” Just because He spoke to you today, doesn’t mean that it’s going to happen tomorrow. I have heard things spoken to me by God 5 years ago which still has not happened, but I know it’s in my future and I don’t have to doubt them.
So how do you deal with this word that you received from God? Maybe you are not even sure if it was God? My best advice would be to not share it with many people. Mention it to your closest friends and guard it in your heart. If God spoke this word then He will make it come to pass and He will walk this journey with you and lead you all the way. Ask Him to give you scripture to accompany His word.
“so shall My word be that goes out from My mouth; it shall not return to Me empty, but it shall accomplish that which I purpose, and shall succeed in the thing for which I sent it.” Isaiah 55:11
God will always finish everything which He starts. You do not need to act on this word, unless He tells you to. Just relax and wait for His guidance. It might be months before He mentions anything again relating to the word. Put your focus on Jesus and follow Him. Don’t let the word distract you from what He has put in your hands at this moment. He will tell you the next step when the time is right.
“When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways. For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known.” 1 Corinthians 13:11-12
Now you see only a part of the journey, but in the future you will see it fully. The worst thing that we can do is try to make something happen in our own strength before the time is right. This will only discourage us and be a struggle. Breaking the door down or slamming against it with your fists will not make the journey easier, rather wait until God opens the door for you and tells you to walk through it.
The journey that we are on is such an incredibly exciting one and Jesus is taking us from glory to glory in Him. Be ready to learn everything which He wants to teach you in the meantime to prepare you for the calling that He has for you. Faith is the evidence of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen (Heb 11:1). He is putting you in this situation to teach you, therefore open your heart and trust Him completely. He is the author and perfecter of our faith (Heb 12:2) and I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ. (Phil 1:6) No one can walk this road for you, it's between you and God. He is for us and not against us. He delights in us and His plans are marvellous!
“But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” Matt 6:33Photo credit: Mandy Lynne


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His name is Hayden Tenno, and he is going to kill you.
D3 Publisher and Digital Extremes are slowly lifting the veil from their upcoming sci-fi opus, Dark Sector. Though a playable version of the game is still several months away, there has been an influx of information about the title in the past several months. In that time, we've seen the outer space theme and futuristic cyber-suit step aside in favor of a more modern setting and a greater emphasis on the storyline -- and we've seen quite a bit of video as well.
Today, IGN gotten their hands on even more media but this time it has a twist. In addition to the standalone teaser that shows off a couple of brutal kill scenarios, we've also obtained a "DVD Commentary" version that explains Dark Sector in added detail. Project Lead Steve Sinclair walks us through 90 seconds of footage and covers everything from the motivation of lead character Hayden Tenno, the Glaive weapons he employs, the inclusion context-based fatalities, and a sneak peek at the adventure's first boss creature.

domain: game


We are largely shaped by our environment in terms of our thoughts, attitudes, and feelings. There has been much discussion about how attitude is contagious and how the right people can really change your mental state. Unfortunately, we live in a world that is filled with negativity and pessimism.
Within five minutes of watching the news, you will be bombarded with death, destruction, and impending doom (and that was true even before COVID). There seems to be no better compliment to good news than bad news.
The good is often overshadowed by the bad. Our views of the world will largely be shaped by the media we consume (including television, social media, and the internet as a whole). Sadly, much of what we see emphasizes negativity. (more…)


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The Highly Sensitive Person in Love
Understanding and Managing Relationships When the World Overwhelms YouBook - 2016 | First Harmony Books edition.
"Statistics show that 50 percent of what determines divorce is genetic temperament. And, if you are one of the 20 percent of people who are born highly sensitive, the risk of an unhappy relationship is especially high. Your finely tuned nervous system, which picks up on subtleties and reflects deeply, would be a romantic asset if both you and your partner understood you better. But without that understanding, your sensitivity is likely to be making your close relationships painful and complicated. Based on Elaine N. Aron’s groundbreaking research on temperament and intimacy, The Highly Sensitive Person in Love offers practical help for highly sensitive people seeking happier, healthier romantic relationships. From low-stress fighting to sensitive sexuality, the book offers a wealth of practical advice on making the most of all personality combinations."--
Publisher: New York : Harmony Books,
Edition: First Harmony Books edition.
Copyright Date: ©2016
Branch Call Number: 158.2 ARON
Characteristics: xxiii, 261 pages ; 21 cm

domain: library


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- Fraser IP, Han L, Han TH, Li CC, Hreniuk D, Stoch SA, et al. Successes and tolerability of rizatriptan in painful migraineurs in a randomized what is cyproheptadine used to treat.
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O not take extra cyproheptadine australia to make up the missed dose. Seek emergency medical attention or call the Poison Help line at 1-800-222-1222.When I m hit with a carb craving which is cyproheptadine australia often I eat 30mg of a healthy carb such as a 2 inch chunk of carrot It satisfies perfectly as long as you havent consumed a protein in the last 2 hrs.
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Abortive therapy.Tori explained how we use it but I will add that in addition to the hunger benefit, we feel it may also have a cyproheptadine australia effect. We have some families report that their children have reduced vomiting while taking the medicine.
What is periactin used for in cats?
Visser WH, Winner P, Strohmaier K, Klipfel M, Peng Y, McCarroll K, et al. Rizatriptan 5 mg for the cyproheptadine used to treat treatment of migraine in adolescents: results from a double-blind, single-attack study and two open-label, multiple-attack studies.Headache.
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The material appearing on LIVESTRONG.Tell your doctor or pharmacist if you notice anything else that is making you feel unwell.
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If you provide a urine sample for drug screening, tell the laboratory staff that you are taking cyproheptadine. This is not a complete list of side effects and others may occur.That first trial lasted only a couple days. This past summer I was so fatigued turns out Periactin 2mg 5ml was deficient in vitamins D and B12 that I decided maybe the side effects I experienced on cyproheptadine the first time would be welcome.
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text:
Aleasa Word, Wordallogic, The Professed Word
Copyright 2013 Aleasa M. Word All Rights Reserved
People typically assume the female partner who cheats
with the committed or married man is a woman without morals. After all, how could she do such a thing if she has proper values in place right?
Many men have who like to step outside of their relationships love to pick the “GOOD GIRL” to cheat with and know just how to get her to participate. These women, though intelligent can often be used BECAUSE of their lifestyles and their values in a way that leaves them broken hearted and riddled with self-esteem issues. Here are a few reasons why “Bad Boys” love to cheat with “Good Girls.”
1. The Secrecy Act: Many women who fall prey to these types of relationships have built up a solid, healthy reputation in their communities and possibly even nationally. They have as much to lose as the man who is cheating on his wife or significant other, making secrecy something they can count on almost 100% of the
time. She can’t afford to be looked at as a woman with loose morals having to endure a public scandal.
2. One Shot Stop: Not everyone grows up to aspire to be the other woman. Plenty of women have had relationships that turned out bad and end up alone. These women standing on principal often times get lonely too. These guys know she most likely never did anything like this before and will probably be faithful to them even though they themselves have someone else. This is her first time, and hopefully her last time.
3. Clean and Clear: In a world where sexually transmitted disease transmissions are continuing to rise, unbelievably there are still those who assume because she’s a good girl that somehow makes her instantly disease free. These are the women these men love!!! They can be free and clear, not using any protection assuming they can’t catch anything because she doesn’t have anything. These young ladies make it easy by proudly volunteering up front they keep their stuff in check and get tested to prove it! In moves “Mr. I Want to Sleep with You and Dump You” to get a free ride on the good train.
4. Baby Free Zone: When the REALLY good girls are selected, the issue of producing a baby is minimized. Because she most likely doesn’t believe in children outside of marriage, some sort of birth control (but not necessarily condoms) will be used to prevent any unwanted pregnancies. The sad part is even with birth control, IUD or injections, nothing is 100% guaranteed and some men have found
that out the hard way. “Ummmm, hello wifey….here’s your new step child.”
5. Hope Springs Eternal: Because these women usually still believe true love exists, they are hopeless romantics deep down inside. This kind of guy is excellent when it comes to honing in on this one and uses it to his advantage. He appears damaged, in need of an understanding woman and she often feels sorry for him……....End Scene!!! Wooh, who hasn’t seen this movie before? She’s hooked, desperately trying to play the role of the hero and ends up clearly out of order while he hooks his fish. He’s really good, even pretending to give her tidbits she can prove to condone her needing to help him.
6. Drama Free for Me: This woman gets her feelings intertwined with him before she even realizes what is happening. Her self-esteem or confidence is quite high in all areas of her life except for relationships because she's had to wait so long to get one. She doesn’t want to drive him away and suppresses everything in her to make sure there is NO DRAMA and he will keep coming back to her. The tough part is once she realizes she’s not number one, it’s too late and she’s in it for HIM to win it until she gets tired or he moves on. And who knows, in her mind she could be thinking “if I’m not like HER, maybe I’ll be the one.”
There are definitely more reasons than these that a “GOOD GIRL” is attractive to a bad boy; however, listing them all would be give those guys more ammunition. Not all men are like this thank goodness but for those out there who are, I would hope this opens some eyes as women begin to see themselves in one of the scenarios above.
At the end of the day folks, if you don’t want be tied down– simply don’t be tied down. Allow yourself the chance to sew your oats if that’s what you feel you need to do BEFORE you ruin someone else’s heart, break their trust and leave another bitter person to fend for themselves in the world making it hard for the rest. Though it may be a dog-eat-dog world, it doesn’t have to stay that way but the change can begin with you. In the meantime, I’ll keep praying for all of you!
Copyright 2013 Aleasa M. Word All Rights Reserved
Life is not fair! How many times have I heard that? I’ve said it, heard it from co-workers and even from children. What or who determines fair? Is it our pre-conceived notions based on our personal belief systems? Obviously so, because I’ve never seen a “BOOK OF FAIR” published and revised at the birth of every human being right. Fairness itself is always different for every person. Life IS simply what it IS until it changes.
Now with fairness out of the picture, what do we do about our life in general? Many have divorces, parenting issues, job crisis, financial crisis, health crisis and the list goes on. One client said “well I didn’t choose this, life chose it for me.” I had to think about that for a while and really re-evaluate that statement. It appeared that the issue at hand was one that randomly dropped in her lap and it did not seem FAIR for all intensive purposes. At the end of the day, self-chosen, fair or not – she had something to deal with.
So wasn’t that was the answer all along, “she had something to deal with?”’ As a coach, people frequent individuals in my field looking for answers. They want solutions to the problems and un-stickers for the stuck places in life. More than likely, the answers have always been there; but, we get bogged down by self-confidence issues that lead to fear and we forget to look for these answers. We have a choice in every situation yet often, we sit complacent waiting for the choice to jump out and grab us. I like to compare this to building a house. All of the materials have been ordered and even the right workers are in place but the house is not built. You must CHOOSE to pick up the tools and get to the task of building the house. If you don’t, all you have are workers, tools and bricks.
With that said, I must ask, what is YOUR threshold for change? When do you decide YOU no longer want to be a project manager, managing the project of life that you were tasked to and decide to pick up the bricks, use the tools and direct the workers? Whether it is a divorce, unemployment or even financial concerns stop choosing the mess and the stress. Instead, un-choose those and pick the solution for $2000 please! Living in denial or fear sends us into a whirlwind of self-induced paralysis that leads us to the city of “nothingness.”
Attitude, affects our motivation or lack thereof! Yes it’s possible you’ve had a hard time. It seems as if things that are not I your control have found their way to your doorstep. True, true, true! But does it have to stay that way? Heck NO!!!! On this day stop choosing to live in the squalor of filth and chaos (lies, guilt, jealousy, fear, disorganization, procrastination) and build the damn house! This is your life and you have every right to be happy even if you used to be one of the meanest, cold-hearted people in the world. Yesterday is in your past unless you continue to drag it into your future like a bag of dirty socks adding no value with a stash of hidden motives on the side.
Take this moment to reflect on what you have been choosing or in the coaching world known as tolerating and UN-CHOOSE the mess, lose the stress, and become the best you can be!
Copyright 2013 Aleasa M. Word All Rights Reserved
A young lady recently reached out to me for help. She was in her early twenties and was a single mother. She had a tough life growing up. Born to a crack addicted mother and partially raised by a crack addicted father, it was almost as if she had no chance of survival. Fortunately another family member stepped in to help raise her. They did the best they could but over the years, her pre-disposition to drug abuse finally dug in its ugly heals.
This young woman reached her early twenties and faced odds most of us can only read about just to finally succumb to the environment in which she was born. After realizing she did something awful that could ultimately affect her two year old son she needed to find a way out. She wanted to find a way to get out of the cycle of drug addiction, poverty, single parenthood and violence she’d become so accustomed to. But how could she do it, now facing a criminal record? What is a person supposed to do when they mess up so badly one time and they can’t see their way out? What can a person do whose support system is in place but the only thing it’s supporting is a rash of negative words and condescending comments aimed at an already beaten person?
After speaking with this young lady all I could do was cry on the way home and thank God for the opportunities I’ve had and choices I’ve made. The pain in her eyes cried out to me begging for help as she sat in a state of despair trying her best to hold on to what dignity she had left. During this moment of revelation I also began to ask myself whether or not I was even equipped to help her. I’ve never been arrested in my life though I’ve worked to help many who have. I wasn’t born to drug addicted parents nor raised by a family member other than my own parents and again I know many who were. Even with that she thanked me over and over for simply listening. She thanked me for caring enough to spend time with her and
for even trying to help her get on track and find a job.
So many of us have no idea the insurmountable odds other face. We try and try to be helpful but end up judging people in the end. We ask questions like “why did they even try drugs if they knew they were susceptible to addiction?” Or other things like “with all of the programs out there to help people now days why would anyone go that way?” Hearing questions like that used to piss me off but now I take a deep breath as I try to digest the ignorance of people who haven’t been there. In trying to fix our welfare system which was giving a free pass to so many who took advantage, those still in real need of assistance are now suffering because of all of the cuts. Many addiction programs have certain stipulations like: you must have been convicted of a crime, you must be addicted to certain types of drugs or you must be on public assistance. We don’t have enough resources and people get desperate. Desperation turns to uncivilized behaviors
that the masses often don’t understand.
I don’t really know what the answer is for this young lady but I do know I’m going to do what I can to help her. She enrolled herself in a drug addiction program after she finally had her one brush with the law. She is now living with these same family members that beat her down every day as the drugs call her name trying to convince her to let them ease the pain as she looks in her baby’s eyes trying with everything she has to beat it. My hope is that she can get the charge dropped to something lower and get her life back on track. But if she can’t the cycle of addiction and poverty will continue and her child will be the next one in a line of statistics that need to change.
Copyright 2013 Aleasa M. Word All Rights Reserved
*Photo's are found publicly on the WWW, we do not claim ownership of photography and will gladly remove if necessary
About a year ago I had the opportunity to listen to a sermon wherein the pastor made in inference to multiple independent discovery. This is a hypothesis that describes instances of similar and or same discoveries made by scientists working independent of one another within a relatively short time period. This phenomenon is recognized by historians and sociologists in addition to many in the scientific community.
The incidence of multiple independent discovery is so repetitive that the scientific community keeps ongoing records of them. Familiar discoveries of things such as the jet engine, polio vaccine, theory of evolution and even calculus are described as being discovered by more than one person. The list of recorded discoveries dates as far back as s pre-13th century and is filled with interesting facts.
It appears under the right conditions at the right time it is possible that brilliant minds truly do think alike. But what are those conditions and what makes that timing right? What makes those people continue to plug away at the possibility of their discovery when many of the rest of us continue to procrastinate? How do we go from being a thinker to a person who acts on a hunch or idea and bring it to fruition?
As a former chronic procrastinator myself, the idea of multiple independent discovery certainly helps me to understand a great deal about my own life. I can now see why my not being the early bird has stopped me from obtaining the worm several times! Fortunately, having knowledge of such a phenomenon also helps me to forge ahead with a different mindset and educate fellow procrastinators.
So the question now before you is what have you thought of or planned to do and not made any strides toward? Is it a career change you are thinking about? Or have you thought of a brilliant invention that no one has ever put out on the free marketplace? Is it the type of invention that you feel will revolutionize the way we do things, how we make money or help others? In light of the fact that we have over 6 billion people on earth, it is inevitable that someone else has either thought of or will think of your idea in the near future. Will you allow them to take the ball and run with it or will you make a move today? Will you step out on faith knowing that without action you may possibly lose the best idea you’ve ever had to someone else?
Take time and realize the potential you have for greatness RIGHT NOW! Stop making excuses for why you can’t or won’t do that thing you think is so great. Find out what obstacles are in your way to make it happen before someone else does. Unless it is something you’ve already gotten a patent on, you may be sitting around next week with the would of, should of, could of thoughts going through your head. It is only a matter of time before the planets, brain cells, or whatever else it takes align properly and another mind just as brilliant as yours may grab that thunder you believe belongs to you!
Copyright 2011 Aleasa M. Word All Rights Reserved
*Photo's are found publicly on the WWW, we do not claim ownership of photography and will gladly remove if necessary.
Everyone and their brother is writing about what happened to those poor babies and brave adults at Sandy Hook Elementary in Connecticut. The mere thought of
reliving the entire ordeal in a blog makes me literally want to cry.
I am saddened for each and every family who was affected and I am saddened for America in general. What kind of world do we live in when people have to debate whether or not to ban assault weapons for anyone other than military or police? I mean think about it. What would the average person really need them for? Are they planning to shoot up 50 dear at a time as one person said to me?
What is America’s fascination with guns anyway? Why do so many people feel they need to have them? The average person who owns a gun for personal use never has to use them for self-defense. More times than not they either collect dust in the house or end up hurting the wrong person.
Do we need to take a deeper look at the Americans who love guns mindset? Could it be there real issue here is power? Do we feel son disempowered in our everyday lives that we need to , yearn to, seek to find a
way to feel like we are on top some way, somehow? Does having a gun give people an adrenalin rush? All the while people are making millions of dollars off of citizen’s love of guns! Is this a price people want to keep paying for lives? Do lives have dollar signs attached to them?
I know people go to the shooting range regularly for fun. They feel on top of the world when they shoot a target. They say it’s good clean fun! But how can good clean fun be something that could ultimately take people’s lives?
I found it interesting that the NRA deactivated their facebook & twitter accounts after this most recent gun spree at the elementary school. If people have such good reasoning for having these weapons, why hide behind your deactivated computer screens?
Fortunately for me, I don’t want gun in my house! I have no desire to have a gun in my house. I go by the rule of thumb that guns don’t kill people, it’s the people behind them that do. I don’t want to be one of those people. I’m not interested in being that person whose gun gets found accidentally by a child or is accessible to someone else who could be in a fit of rage.
So for all of you gun lovers, I hope this terrible mass killing makes you think about your actual reasons for having a gun and the statistics of people who have had to use them for intruders vs the ones who ended up hurting themselves, relatives or helpless individuals.
And to the people of Newtown, CT may God give you comfort as you mourn your angels.
Copyright 2011 Aleasa M. Word All Rights Reserved
In memory of the man who inspired this story in 2011 John C. I am reposting. R.I.P.
Walking into the room, oblivious to anything else going on, there he stood. Not much to speak of, just a male doing what men do. I said hello, then he said hello. Then silence. Shortly thereafter, I asked how he was as we waited for his food to cook in the microwave. He began to make small talk and then dropped the bomb on me. The "big C"
Was I friends with this person? NO. Did I really know much about him? NO. Had I even solicited this information by asking questions about his health? NO. I was waiting just like he was and then he said it. In an instance I was silent, yet I knew I should say something. What should I say? What would I say? How
should I react? Did my face have “the look” revealing the letters OMG that just jumped into my head? Then it struck me. How do you answer cancer?
I picked up my pieces after only a few seconds which seemed like an hour. I looked him in the eye and said “you’re going to be fine” as if I already knew. I’m not quite sure that was what he expected to hear; but, that’s what made sense in my mind at that moment. Maybe God gave me those words. For all of the shock, there was a peace that passed all understanding for this person who I never really knew on a personal level. (At least for a second that is.) Though others had been sick before, I began to feel empty for him. He said “kids get it all the time, so I’ll just have to man up and take my medicine like they do.” At that second, that very moment, I just wanted to cry and give him a hug. How could I? Would he be receptive? Would it be appropriate? I stood there looking at him during that awkward moment crying inside and said “ I will pray for you.”
When it comes to praying for people I realize praying for someone never costs us anything. I didn’t even know this man’s views on religion; but, it came natural to me to say that to him. He politely said “thank you.” As it never skipping a beat, we continued on about someone else I knew who’d been recently diagnosed and was getting treatment. All the while I stood there stunned on the inside, hopeful on the outside.
Why did this man feel he needed to tell me about his recent diagnosis? Was he that comfortable being around me? Did he feel a peace in the room that I was not privy too? Or did he just need to talk? Was saying it his way of making it real and accepting it? How could he just blurt it out? One thing for sure, this was not at all about me. It was about what he needed to do deal with the cards he was dealt. It was about my good friend who’d given me her praise report that same day that she didn’t have the big "C" but had been concerned.
Suddenly the microwave beeped. What was I supposed to do now? How was this conversation supposed to end? How can you just walk away when someone drops something this heavy in your lap? How do you answer cancer?
Having a few relatives who survived breast cancer when I was younger didn’t give me a real insight into what people have to go through when they have it. Unless you’re on the front line with them, you don’t have any idea of what it’s like to deal with the chemotherapy and radiation. No clue about all of the follow up visits hoping it’s gone. Whether you know these things exist or not, to know it and to live it are two different beasts.
God knows I hope we soon find a cure for this dreadful disease. Everyone from celebrities to John Doe on the street can step into cancer’s path at any time. They too may be hard pressed to answer the question - How do you answer cancer?
To them and to you I hope that you may stay well. For those who have it, all I can really say is be encouraged - though I have no idea at all how you are really feeling inside. I do know that whatever you are feeling or whatever you are going through, I give you my love and prayers. I have no answer for cancer
but I know God does.
Copyright 2012 Aleasa M. Word All Rights Reserved
It’s funny how as we age we begin to hear people say things like “I was born alone, I’ll die alone.” Each time I hear that statement, I can’t help but wonder “what about thelivingin between birth and death?” So many people are afraid to be alone they’ll do almost anything not to be. They’ll pick up random road partners, roommates, party mates, bed mates and so on. Where does that come from? Is it part of that old psychologist Abraham Maslow’s self-actualization hierarchy of needs under the “belonging” heading? Or is it that we have become so used to congregating together in the civilized world we don’t know how to function independent of others? Maybe it goes back as far as biblical times where it was written that God said “it is not good for man to be alone.” Though this is believed to be true by many I venture to add “it is also not good for man to make a mess he doesn’t want to live with.” Whatever the reason for it, loneliness exists. Now there is a big difference in being alone and lonely as we all know. There aren’t too many of us who haven’t known people who are married, have children or some other significant other but still seek significance everywhere they go. These people are surrounded by others but are very lonely on the inside. They have not found a connection within themselves that permits them to feel the companionship of others in their circle. In some cases the “others” they have in their life serve as nothing more than white noise, just there for the ride for no rhyme or reason. There is no positive purpose, they just exist.
· How many do you know that have these white noise types of intimate relationships? Are you one?
· Have you ever questioned your motives or those of others who have someone in their life yet they have no
real desire to be with them?
· What is so lacking in a person that they would continue to tolerate this?
· How do we uncover or rebuild our value systems to avoid settling “just so that we have someone? “
· Is it that people are worried others will see them as inadequate if they don’t have a mate?
I’d like to think this loneliness avoidance strategy only pertains to those who have been in long term relationships and lost their desire to function alone, but that’s not true. From those green to the intimate relationship world and those who are veterans, it happens every day. What can we do to deal with this and maintain our dignity at the same time?
· Remember, just because you are by yourself does not mean anything is wrong with you.
· Create your OWN set of relationship standards with non-negotiables that you know you need to be happy
and connected to a partner.
· Develop your OWN hobbies, habits and interests to fulfill you before your try to fulfill someone else or vice
· Date yourself for a while so YOU may like YOU all by yourself and increase the likelihood of finding
someone who likes you just as you are.
It’s a sad reality, relationships just aren’t’ what they used to be. Many people lack values and throw away hearts like tissues. This has created a culture full of bitter people who stay alone and miserable or others so desperate for companionship they will stay with anyone rather than being by themselves.
Far be it from me to tell anyone to leave a relationship unless they were in physical danger. Yet, I will say you need to ask yourself if the position your mate is in can be filled with anyone similar to them. If the answer is yes, they have become merely a placeholder in your life and that’s not fair to them or you. If the answer is no, they are irreplaceable, then more than likely your relationship is pretty solid at least from your perspective. Either way, loneliness is a state of mind that comes from within. It is best served with introspection and learning to be whole all by yourself.
Copyright 2012 Aleasa M. Word All Rights Reserved
Each day we are faced with choices. Sometimes it’s very hard to decide which road to travel on. On second thought forget that I said sometimes and instead replace that with most of the time. But how do we choose when it comes to matters of the heart?
Hopefully people can relate to both good and bad relationship experiences. However, in this world we live in today more report they’ve never really experienced a good relationship. The question is how do we determine what a good relationship is?
· What standards do we use, ours or the world’s?
· What relationships have we seen to use as the benchmark?
· What qualifications do we possess to say we know what a good relationship is?
· Is a “good” relationship determined on a case to case basis as it relates to your individual relationship rhythm?
No matter how you answer the questions above, one factor a lot of people are faced with when they do decide to look for or enter into a relationship is whether or not they should choose love or security. Old school relationship standards picked security over love. Many young women 20 to 30 years ago were taught to be with the man who could provide for you and you would learn to love him. But I wonder:
· Is that really possible to force love with a person?
· Can you learn to love someone because they represent security in life?
· Is it possible to develop a deep, passionate love for someone whose main attraction was security?
Should you instead follow your heart and choose the person who makes you happy? This is the same person who you share dreams or goals with. This is the person who may have potential but is probably not in that place of security yet. Your heart is captive to them. After all the heart wants what it wants right?
It’s all up to individual choices. With the potential mate who you love, you run the risk of them never reaching their full potential. Can you handle that, or is that ok because you’d rather be happily in love than secure? Should you choose the one who works or has a business and can help save towards the future or in some instances take care of you? Will you be fulfilled or will you find yourself straying because they were never what you really wanted in the first place?
Love is a splendid but funny thing as is life itself. When asked the question should one pick Love or Security, I think it depends where you are in your life. If you are established, have had your children, gone through divorce, purchased a home and such love may be what you are looking for. You may not be in a place where you are looking for security in another person because somehow you’ve been able to develop it for yourself due to circumstances. If you are younger and looking to start out in life with a family, new home and such you may decide security is more important to you. You may want to have a solid unit for your children or even for yourself. You may need to feel that safety net when you come home from work or even if you’re a stay at home person.
No matter what it is that you choose make it an individual choice. Don’t let the world’s opinion of what YOU need to do in YOUR life impact your decision unless the decision s somehow violent or detrimental to your well-being. People connect with others for various reasons at various times in their life. Choose what is best for you because the world will certainly do the same and not ask for your opinion!
How many times have you heard people gossiping about other people as if they were better than them? You know the type - those holier than thou folks that we all claim to not like. What about when we become that snooty, I’m better than you person? How can we not recognize this despised trait within our own selves yet continuously see it in others?
As time goes on, memories of things we’ve done in our past sometimes conveniently slip away. Even if we remember, we somehow manage to justify why behaviors were acceptable when we engaged in them. We become quite the expert in giving a run down on the extenuating circumstances or even minimize the deviance of our behaviors. We then go on to shift the focus from ourselves to the person we are bashing or looking down our noses at.
The reality is we all came from somewhere to get to where we are today. There are many parents, aunts, uncles and other relatives who have loads of old skeletons in their closets trying to spill their way back out into view of others. Those people are usually ashamed of their wayward years as young adults and do their best to keep these things hidden. Does it really help anyone when we decide to hide those past behaviors? People often look over their shoulder, telling lies to cover up lies to appear perfect on the surface.
Too many times in life, we hear references to breaking the cycle. How do we break those cycles of generations full of bad or not so good behaviors? Certainly forgetting where we came from and looking down on others doesn’t appear to be the right way. But what is the answer? How do we allow the secrets to come out and avoid humiliation or our children thinking what’s good for the goose is good for the gander? What impact do we have on others who we don’t even know when we act like we’ve always been upstanding?
A great deal of people are turned off from some very nice religious choices for these very reasons. Some people shake, rattle and roll on Sundays forgetting all about their past indiscretions. Some of those indiscretions were even from the night before. Now don’t get me wrong, everyone has a right to change and hopefully for the better. But does that entitle them to feel as though they are now superior to others who are currently where they used to be? Or does it really mean because they were there they should be more helpful and understanding of others in that position?
Isn’t it the role of people to help other people? With that thought, couldn’t the mere fact that you’ve made some mistakes be the help some people need? Even theologians know Jesus surrounded himself with the less than desirables in an effort to pull them away from what they were doing wrong. He never looked down on them or proclaimed he was better. He most definitely didn’t do as many people today do by misusing the scriptures when the word refers to a passage that says “come out from amongst them” just to have an excuse to look down on them.
We all have had things we aren’t proud of that are part of the who we are now. It is those things that should keep us humble and allow us compassion towards our fellow man or woman when they slip. If we could only embrace people by remembering back to how we thought or felt during our less than virtuous times, perhaps we could be of better service to others. It is no secret that our minds don’t even think the same way at 22 as they would at 42. Knowing that surely speaks to the fact that young people need guidance. Who better to guide them then someone who has been there? The guidance, however should come without judging but with love and compassion.
For all of the parents looking appallingly at their children, don’t forget those late nights filled with underage drinking and dangerous liaisons that perhaps you or some of your friends may have engaged in. No one is condoning or encouraging such behavior, but having some understanding may be the difference between connecting which can draw someone out of that life or disconnecting and pushing them further into it.
Today’s world offers a mind set of “get it now.” If you want to “get it later,” it’s often too late. The faster we go the more we seem to rush to get nowhere. Once we get there we can’t quite complete our tasks the way we wanted to because there’s always something else to do.
Has America become too busy to accomplish anything? Whether in a single parent home or a home with two parents we are stretched from one end to the other. Somehow 24 hours in a day used to be long enough to allow time for rest and fun. Now, 24 hours is not enough time to fit in most of our professional requirements let alone any rest or playtime.
· How did this all happen?
· Why compete with other countries to be better or the best, yet falling behind still in everything we do?
· How are other cultures beating us by leaps and bounds in technology and educating their children?
· Are they just more adept at organizing their time - afterall 24 hours is 24 hours right?
As a child, I truly believe I saw far more of my mother in a relaxed mode than my children do of me. From the moment I wake up until the time I fall asleep I’m working. Now granted, my mother was married to my step father so there were two to share the load “TECHNICALLY.” In reality my mom still cooked, cleaned the house, took care of us and even held down a full-time job. Keeping that in mind, we still managed to have time to eat together, play board games and even help her with the 1000 to 5000 piece puzzles she loved so much. That’s enough to make a new millennium parent feel slightly inadequate at times.
Why is it we can’t manage to do it all if our parents did? Perhaps it’s because we work further away from our jobs than prior generations. Maybe it’s because the workday has been extended from what it once was. Or could it be the responsibilities at work are so taxing we just don’t have the energy to do more? Add to that all of the kid’s extracurricular activities or the families in the lurch working two and three jobs just to make ends meet you then have America 2012!
I’ve noticed with all I have going on, it is often that I have far more projects started or thought about than I have completed. So in the meantime what are we getting done? It seems like we have all these pots started but can’t seem to get a damn thing cooked. As soon as one starts boiling we tend to it. Then another one starts to pop and we have to turn it down. In the middle of that something is sticking on the back of the stove and we reach over nearly burning our self (or burning out) in the process. How do we manage it all?
The answer is simply F.O.C.U.S. That’s easier said than done right? Or instead is that word just too broad? Well try this on for size because it seems more feasible.
· On one
· Course of action
· Successfully completed – F.O.C.U.S!!
Yes, that really is the answer. Sometimes we fill our plates up so much we make it virtually impossible to complete anything. Taking an assessment of our priorities and then putting them in order according to importance is the only way to turn that mountain of responsibility into a mole hill. At that point we can work on one task at a time and finish it!
Life is hard enough as it is. We all want to feel a sense of accomplishment naturally. Having too much to do and not getting any of it done eats away at our self-esteem because we feel incompetent. We ARE competent under the right circumstances, but it’s up to us to create those. So for now, keep on fixing those pots but don’t put so many on at the same time. You’ll feel a lot better knowing that you are accomplishing the things you need to complete!

domain: psychology


text:
W e are a nation divided by stress. In the blue corner are the executives who thrive on stress. They say anyone with ambition should learn to cope with the rigours of modern working life. Stress brings out the best in all of us, they maintain.
In the red corner are the professionals who worry about the affect of stress on productivity (they say it declines), family life (the UK has the highest divorce rate in Europe) and individual health (the courts are clogged up with workers claiming compensation for stress).
Next week the Health & Safety Executive will hold a conference to discuss the latest findings of its investigation into how managers deal with stress. A series of pilot schemes have been testing a toolkit developed by the HSE that it believes will help prevent stress at work.
Des Browne, minister with responsibility for health and safety at work, will open the conference, which will also be addressed by Bill Callaghan, chair of the Health and Safety Commission (HSC).
The conference will precede by a matter of days national stress awareness day (November 5) when professionals hope to highlight how stress is adding to the costs of British business.
They point to research that estimates the number of people suffering from anxiety, depression or bad nerves has soared to almost 4m.
The figure has increased by 62% over the past decade even though Britons are healthier, wealthier and live in a safer society, says William Nelson, co-author of the book Complicated Lives.
More research by the Health & Safety Executive puts a figure on the level of stress. In a report this week, the agency says 83% of employers believe stress is interfering with productivity and now costs British companies £1.24bn a year. "It is seriously damaging the attempts of British businesses to increase productivity and to attract and retain staff," the HSE says.
UK companies cite the pressure of competing and surviving in the economic downturn, says the report, as one of the biggest barriers to combating workplace stress and identify increasing service and business pressures as key triggers.
Malcolm Bruce MP, Liberal Democrat shadow trade and industry spokesman, says: "This survey highlights that when people's health suffers due to stress at work, business loses too. If we want to get the best out of people, in whatever role they play at work, then companies must work harder with the Health and Safety Executive to make sure stress-free workers boost business productivity."
Much of the debate on stress focuses on male workers. But according to another survey this week almost half of women admit to shouting at friends, family and workmates to deal with stress while others resort to alcohol and junk food.
In a poll of women aged 20 to 45, 45% confessed to taking the stress in their daily lives out on those closest to them. The Omnibus survey Don't Let Stress Stop You also revealed some worrying habits among younger women. In the 20-24 age group, almost a quarter (23%) admitted to getting drunk regularly to cope with stress.
When it comes to advice, however, stress consultants might get little change out of the companies they approach with tales of lost productivity and low morale. Yet another survey this week revealed many employers believe workers use stress as an excuse to take time off. Fifty one per cent of personnel managers believe that more than half the days employers lose to claims of stress are "not genuine".

domain: sociology


Foreign fans arriving in Budapest to watch the UEFA European League final engaged in a brawl near the stadium, Budapest police said on its website on Wednesday afternoon. Police arriving at the scene took seven people into custody, police.hu said. In the brawl three people were injured, two of whom, a Spanish and a Swedish national, were taken to hospital. Legal proceedings have been launched against several Polish nationals. Meanwhile, police took into custody two other Polish nationals who assaulted a Spanish and an Italian fan in central Budapest. Legal proceedings have been also launched against them, the police website said.


text:
Carousel Cakes Blue Velvet Cake
My Blue Heaven
"Gayle fell hard for this blue velvet cake with cream cheese icing and sugar snowflakes. Just add coffee, milk, or a flute of Champagne."—Oprah
Printed from Oprah.com on Friday, March 7, 2014
© 2010 OWN, LLC. All Rights Reserved.

domain: food


text:
Articulation’s show at Portals Gallery in Duncan BC is fast approaching. Members' works are arriving on the Island in various containers, designing surface trails by land and sea and hopefully, nothing is lost in the between.
The show opens March 26th at the Island Savings Centre, 2687 James Street, Duncan. Pencil it in if you are in the area up to and including April 18th.
|Flotsam detail, by Amanda Onchulenko|
|Verdant by Ingrid Lincoln|


text:
S.F. Office Building Planned
An Atlanta-based developer plans to build a $100 million office building on a vacant lot south of Market Street in San Francisco.
Cousins Properties, a publicly held real estate investment trust, disclosed in a federal filing that it has joined with an unidentified partner to buy the 0.6-acre property at the southeast corner of Mission and Second streets. The price was not disclosed.
Formerly occupied by several run-down commercial buildings, the property has remained vacant for several years.
It is zoned for office use up to a maximum of 350,000 square feet.
Peter Tartikoff, chief financial officer of Cousins, said the partners haven't decided how tall the building would be.
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Tartikoff said no tenants have been lined up, and that construction probably won't begin before the middle of next year.
"We're very excited about developing the property, but at this point it is premature to say more," he said.
Cousins, with annual revenues of around $90 million, develops, manages and leases commercial properties mainly in the Southeast.
However, it has lately begun moving into California in a big way.
It is buying properties in Los Angeles County and San Diego, where it plans to develop shopping centers costing $65 million and $50 million respectively.

domain: finance


text:
You don’t have to dig deep to realize how accepting SWIMM are of disappointing news on their forthcoming sophomore LP, Best Comedown Ever—after all, it’s right there in the title. The latest single from the collection is a perfect summary of that attitude, though, with “No Ties” utilizing soulful guitar, sparkling production, and a hint of club energy to soundtrack “an attempt to reverse-engineer the end of a relationship to find the exact moment the magic dies, with a result of finding appreciation in the ephemera of the whole love thing,” as vocalist Chris Hess puts it.
Digging into the moment that sparked the idea for the instrumental, he continues: “My ex-girlfriend and I had this ritual during quarantine of smoking a gratuitous amount of weed and watching The Bachelorette. On the evening that Marton sent me a snippet of what would become ‘No Ties,’ we had taken edibles, so I have this lovely memory of laying on her living room carpet and listening to Marton’s guitar hook over and over again in headphones, while she and her roommate giggled to The Bachelorette. I’m fairly certain I was stuffing my face with banana bread she had made—so yeah, radical core memory.”
He also shares that the track is the most equally collaborative among the outfit’s discography, with all four current members contributing to its unique sheen. “This song makes me really happy because it is an absolute collaboration between the four of us,” Hess notes. “It’s a cool feeling to love your band and be in awe of their facility. The way they create and see music blows my mind… It feels like I can enjoy it as much as if I wasn’t in the band. I know what it’s like to try to make music without feeling inspired, and this song got us really excited to make music again.”
Check out a lyric video for the track below.


text:
Perhentian Underwater Challenge @ Pulau Perhentian, Terengganummw_event
Perhentian Island, a world-renowned tourist destination, is set to draw both local and international visitors at this time as it presents underwater photography competition off the island’s coasts, exciting traditional games, beach soccer and volleyball. Earth awareness programme such as “clean the beach” activity, will also be conducted.
|Date / Time||–|
|Location||Pulau Perhentian, Terengganu, Malaysia
Perhentian Island, Terengganu
|Organiser||Terengganu State Government / Terengganu Tourism Action Council|
|Contact No.||609 626 2946|

domain: geography


More great random fun jumper videos at Music City Skydiving. MCS will be open, weather permitting, until December 18th. We hope to see everyone out … [Read more...] about More fun jumper video over Nashville at MCS
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Adventure travel TV show from covers skydiving in Nashville The show, Tennessee Crossroads, covers tourism and outdoor activities all around … [Read more...] about Skydiving in Nashville covered by TV at MCS
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Music City Skydiving will be going on Live interview today at 5:30 pm CST on News Talk 101.5 in Jackson, Tennessee to give away a tandem skydive. The … [Read more...] about Music City Skydiving gives away a tandem skydive on News Talk 101.5


On the market for an iPhone? Here's a breakdown of all the currently shipping iPhones from Apple.
Apple's iPad-Centric Event to Take Place on October 22
People familiar with Apple's plans tell AllThingsD that the company will hold its next invitation-only event on Tuesday October 22. The focal point of the gathering will the latest updates to the company’s iPad line, but new Mac Pro and OS X Mavericks will likely get some stage time as well, I'm told.Apple's fifth-generation iPad will take on an iPad mini-style design, resulting in a thinner, lighter tablet with smaller side bezels. It's expected to feature a 64-bit A7 processor and an improved camera.
Apple's iPad mini is expected to include the same 64-bit A7 chip along with a Retina display and an 8-megapixel camera. According to recent rumors, the iPad mini could be in short supply and may not see widespread availability until 2014.
Update: The Loop's Jim Dalrymple has seconded the October 22 date with one of his famous "Yep" confirmations.