text: Reality check.  
  
  The old 'walk a mile in their shoes' paradigm.  I've been lucky and haven't had to do the 'walk' but am old enough to have heard the 'talk' about the reality versus the actuality.  
  
  If you listen to 'real people' instead of relying on what you think you 'know' any 'help' you provide might actually help instead of just assuaging your conscience.